Archives: March 2009

An Exciting New Voice in The Christian Crossdressing Community

For about as long as I can remember there are two aspects that have been an enduring part of my life. Even though they make strange bed fellows, my fascination with women’s clothes and my love for Jesus Christ have been constant companions to me. I’ve shared some of my thoughts on  Christianity and Crossdressing already on this blog, though I feel as though I’ve yet to scratch the surface on such an expansive topic.

I’m blessed that readers of Crossdresser Heaven are from all walks of life, of different nationalities, races and creeds. In particular I know that many of you don’t ascribe to the Christian faith. You may be of another faith, or you may have been treated poorly in the past by those claiming the true knowledge of Christianity. I realize that at the mention of Jesus you may be tempted to leave and never come back. I understand how you feel.

I assure you that both Vicki and myself welcome contrary thoughts and opinions – even if we disagree it’s our sharing and conversation that will shape us into more informed, more compassionate people. In particular I welcome those of other faiths who would like to share their trails and breakthroughs. I know that will be a blessing to many, and encourage you to use the comment section liberally (if you’ll pardon the pun…). If you’re still not convinced then at least stay for the crossdressing tips and crossdresser success stories :)

Okay, I’m almost done with the long introduction.

It’s with great pleasure that I introduce you to the first official columnist on Crossdresser Heaven. A sincere and loving Christian lady who has offered to share her inspired (and sometimes verbose :) ) thoughts on Crossdressing and Christianity. She will be sharing her thoughts on a regular basis in her new column Vicki’s Inspirations for Crossdressing Christians. Look for them right here on Sunday mornings and I’m sure that her words will be a blessing to you.

Meet Vicki – A Christian Crossdresser and Our Newest Columnist

vicki-christian-crossdresser

Vicki

When Vanessa asked me if I wanted to try and write a regular column for Crossdresser Heaven, I knew right away that I had to. For a couple of years now, I have felt that God has been calling me to serve Him in some way to the crossdresser community. Well, the call is much larger than that, to encompass not only CD’s but also any and all in the LGBTG world. I feel strongly that God may even be asking me to explore becoming a Pastor and then utilizing that to help serve those needs. But right now, I am doing a lot of discerning prayer, and exploring Scripture, current Christian thought and journals, and asking others to pray for me that the way might become clear. I am also maintaining a prayer journal, that may contain seeds for a future book, or maybe future sermons. Who knows, while the end is still a little bit off in the distance, I feel firmly that the path I am now on is the right one.

Out of those journals I had shared a meditation I had done, with Vanessa, and asked her to either post it for me, or help me with getting it on my own blog. She immediately offered me the chance to write this column. It seemed that God had opened another mile of the path and I wholeheartedly agreed to commit to this. GULP, as they say. But I know in my heart that there is a need for CD’s and our LG and B as well as TG brothers and sisters to hear that God not only loves us as we are, but wants us to use our unique talents and perspectives to help others in His world. So I begin this endeavor, not sure where it may end, but firm in the belief that God does have Her hand in this and that God’s Will be done.

So now a brief bio and it is hard to know what to leave in and what to leave out. I’ve been told that I may be a bit verbose and must adjust my style for the typical blog reader’s attention span, myself included in that company. I’ll try. I’ve been dressing since I was 13 and to say why would require more space than I have here. Hopefully in my columns more of my personal story and how I got here will emerge. I am now 53 and the divorced father of two wonderful young men, who are not aware of their father’s other side, or if they are, choose not to bring it up. I think if you ask my ex wife and myself we’d both say that the dressing was not the primary cause of our marital difficulties, but in my refusal to give it up and her genuine distaste for it, were symptoms of some deeper issues in the marriage that probably would have led us to some quietly bitter and unfulfilled years together in old age. At this point I would also say we both would agree, we are both better for the breakup. I am now with a woman that not only loves me for who I am, but encourages me, helps me with dressing, makeup, deportment and other feminine mysteries, and quite honestly without whose help, I would not be where I am today, starting this column, and excited for the possibilities of living out life as my complete self.

So how am I doing on space Vanessa? [Ed: I think our combined verbosity used up all the allotted space for this article two paragraphs ago :) ] OK, quickly, I have a Bachelor’s degree in History from the University of Washington and have done some post grad work, but that was years ago. I live in Seattle, though as of yet, Vanessa and I have not met face to face. I work full time in drab and devote whatever free time I have to dressing and exploring my Spiritual path and now writing about it. I am a lifetime Lutheran but am currently between church homes. I am excited to be beginning this and pray that comfort be given, that I make some new friends and acquaintances, and this. In other churches that I have been a member, I led the occasional Bible Study and assisted in a new member program by facilitating small group discussions around Scripture. Despite the fact that I was the nominal leader, it never failed to amaze me that I took so much more from others than I ever brought to the table. I hope it is the same here, I invite discussion, I invite questions and criticisms, and I invite us to share our joys, our sorrows, our hidden from all but God concerns, so that we may learn and grow, but mostly so that we can lift each other up in prayer. I have found that one of the greatest privileges of my life is to be able to pray for another child of God.

In Christ’s Name
Vicki

Steve’s Transgender Success Story – To Desert Storm and Back

I’ve retitled this week’s crossdressing success story since it involves people who both identify with two different places on the transgender spectrum.

If you have a story to share you’d like to share with the readers of Crossdresser Heaven, please email me at vanessalaw@crossdresserheaven.com and let me know you’d like me to share with others. If you identify anywhere else on the gender spectrum (transgender, transsexual, etc.) you are also welcome to submit a story. Readers of Crossdresser Heaven are at many places on their journey through gender self-discovery. I know that I would personally love to hear from more ladies who have found a different answer to their gender questions.  Please include:

  • Your femme name
  • A brief introduction (1-2 sentences about where you live, how old you are and such)
  • Your story (if you go over 700 words I’m going to edit you down :) )
  • Optional – A photo of you (no nudity please)

Meet Steve

Steve is a 50 year old cross dresser who lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest (Washington State).

Steve’s Transgender Success Story

I remember I was about 12 years old trying on some of Mom’s old swimsuits I found one day. Then I can remember being about 14 when I got an pair of my sister’s panties.   Little yellow polka dot ones of yellow nylon/white dots.

I used to spend a lot of time looking at women’s underwear pictures in newspaper ads and Sears Catalog and such before I finally got up the nerve to buy some granny panties. This was when I was 15 or 16, and I can tell you I did not like those as much and threw them away. The next time I got panties was when I was 18 and ordered some from a department store. They were white bikini panties, that I then started buying regularly from department stores – the boxed Playtext panties. This went on for several years – I would buy them from department stores by filling out the order form and waiting for delivery (Ed: Ahh, the Internet is such a blessing for the modern crossdresser)

When I got married I told my first wife and she hid all my men’s underwear to force me to give up panties.  Alas I had to throw them all away, I was in the military and could not wear them 24/7. That did not last long and I went through several buy and purge cycles before finally getting a divorce and being able to keep my underwear. I got remarried few years later (you would think I would learn) and told her up front. The marriage lasted a couple of years and when I wanted to wear woman’s jeans we got a divorce. She said I was not “Man Enough”.

Anyway when I retired from the Military I decided to wear what I wanted.   I kept both men’s and women’s underwear.  I met my partner at local Crossdress Social Club meeting.  She was Pre Op Transsexual and we got married after she had the operation. I have been wearing panties and women’s clothes (jeans, some shirts) since then. Heck, I don’t own any men’s underwear or jeans.   Lane Bryant “Right Fit” are my favorite jeans.

I tried the whole dress up thing – Wig, dress, heels and such.  It just was not me.  I’ve been out in public dressed (to dinner with a group), but I realize that I’m a guy who likes to wear woman’s clothes.

I now have a very supportive wife and live quite happily.  I do the housework (I got hurt in Military during Desert Storm and get VA Disability, SSA and CRDP Pay) so I can do what I want and have enough money to live.


Steve – thank you for sharing your story. It may take a while, but we can all find love and acceptance if we look hard enough.

How To Make Your Nails Look Fabulous!

One of the fastest way to tell if someone is just pretending at womanhood is to look at their hands. A woman’s hands are small, delicate, and well kept. In stark contrast to a man’s, which are usually large, rough and dirty. Even crossdressers often do no more than hastily slap on a coat of nail polish before walking out the door.

There’s not much we can do about the size and shape of our hands, but there is still a lot else we can do to enhance our femininity. There are two mistakes crossdressers often make with their hands and nails.

Crossdresser Hand Care

Cross dresser's well manicured nails

Beautifully manicured nails

Firstly, your average transgendered girl doesn’t take care of her hands. If your hands are rough and calloused I’m talking to you. With a few changes you can dramatically improve the appearance of your hands. Start by moisturizing your hands regularly using a moisturizer such as Dove Nourishing Moisture Beauty Hand Cream. I moisturize my hands a few times a day when they start to feel dry. If you’re not able to keep a moisturizer with you during the day, moisturize once when you wake up (after showering), and once before you go to bed.

If your hands still feel rough you can use an exfoliating scrub a few times a week, such as this One Minute Manicure Spa Treatment. This will help remove any dead skin that has built up, and start to work on smoothing your calluses.

Now that you’re on the road to smooth and beautiful hands don’t waste all your effort in the yard this weekend. We all have chores that need to be done, and some of them involve heavy lifting and rough outdoor work. Don’t forget to wear gloves to preserve your feminine appearance!

Nail Polish and Cross Dressers

Nail polish has a seductive feminine allure for cross dressers. Many times this allure is satisfied by a quick dash of nail polish. It may feel good, but unless you’re well practiced your nails will look messy and distinctly unfeminine. Not all of us can create the salon-manicured look, but with practice and by following a few simple steps your nails can accentuate your female appearance.

Clean your nails: Water and soap work well :)
File your nails: Use a nail file to gently round your nails. This will take some practice to do with your off hand.
Apply basecoat: A basecoat (such as OPI Natural Nail Base Coat) will help nourish and strengthen your nails, and at the same time provide a smooth surface for the nail color to bond to.
Apply your favorite color nail polish: It’s best to apply two thin coats, rather than a single thick coat. Start from the center of your nail and work outwards.
Apply topcoat: A top coat will add shine to your nails, and prevent them from chipping. Stay away from 2-in-1 base coat and top coats, rather use a dedicated top coat such as OPI Rapidry Topcoat.  The base coat and top coat are designed to do separate things, and neither will be done well with a mixed formula.
Let your nails dry: Don’t rush it. Your nails will need at least 15 minutes before they’re dry enough for tasks like driving. Wait longer if you plan to wash dishes or change clothes otherwise you’ll smudge your nail polish.

Add some practice and patience and you’re well on your way to beautifully manicured hands without the salon cost!


For more great crossdressing tips download this top rated crossdressing guide.

Where do I Find Crossdressing Support?

The Internet has allowed crossdressers from across the world to take the first step out the closet without leaving the house. There are so many resources and communities available online that even the most timid transgender need not live a life alone in fear. If you’re new to the transgender community I highly recommend you look around the site, you can find an overview of transgender resources here.

Yet humans are naturally social creatures. Even with all the information available online and friends just a facebook away we long for the comfort and companionship of others. Others who understand us, others who love us, and others who will give us support through our crossdressing journey.

Crossdressing Support…Please?

In search of a crossdressing support group

In search of a crossdressing support group

I’m often asked in email for details on local clubs that support crossdressers. The Tri-Ess chapter list is usually a great place to start, but Tri-Ess is just one organization. There are many other organizations that do a great job supporting crossdressers, transsexuals and anyone involved in the transgender community.

While I know of a few places in Seattle, I must admit that I’m at a loss for pretty much the rest of the world. Even if I had intimate knowledge of every crossdressing support group in the USA, I’ve heard a rumor that there are actually a lot of people who don’t live here – funny that :)

I don’t want any crossdresser to suffer alone because they didn’t have a group to reach out to. I’d like to create a comprehensive resource that includes information about transgender support groups from all around the world. But I can’t do this without your your help!

Share Local Crossdresser Support Groups

Please send me details about any crossdresser support groups you know about  by email to vanessalaw@crossdresserheaven.com

Within a few weeks I’ll devote a section of Crossdresser Heaven specifically to helping you find local crossdresser support groups in your area. Please only send me groups that offer support in person, whether it’s meetings, outings or other support activities. And include:

  • Name of the group
  • City, State and Country where they meet
  • Website address (if available)
  • Email
  • Contact name and number
  • Any other notes that would be helpful (e.g. if the group is dedicated to supporting wives of crossdressers)

Thank you for helping a sister reach out and find acceptance. I look forward to hearing from you.

JamieGhee's Crossdressing Success Story – Out The Closet And Into A Ball Gown!

Greetings Dear Readers, this week we have a story from a very special lady who went out en femme for the first time ever a few months ago. Of all the crossdressing success stories I must confess that the two stories that bring the most joy to my heart are those where our fearless heroine engages in a first of epic proportions – venturing out en femme for the first time, or telling their special someone about the woman inside.

Meet JamieGhee

I am JamieGhee, and have been cross dressing since forever. I have never been out en femme, and went to my first event, “Beauty and the Beach,” in Rehobeth Beach, Delaware.

JamieGhee’s Crossdressing Success Story

As I am waiting for check-in time, I am back to experiencing that excitement mixed with anxiety that I have had since I first signed up to be here-back in March. It is now the day before Halloween. All those months of waiting and wondering, and now I’m finally here! The trunk of my car is packed to the top with suit bags, suitcases, four pairs of shoes, three wigs, makeup and a jewelry box. I don’t know if I have brought too much or not enough.

An hour before the first gathering of the evening, I find myself rushing around my room, getting a little frantic as I try to sort out what to wear. I have chosen to bring “age appropriate” clothing, being 64 years old after all. My first choice is a dark red, ankle length skirt with a white, puffy sleeved blouse. With makeup done, I put on my hair and slip into black pumps with three inch heels, my most comfortable shoes. Then there’s this totally new thing, a purse, and what goes in it? Then finally, there she is, reflected back in the full length mirror. The image smiles a little, and oh my gosh, this is it!

I have determined in advance, from the advice on Ms. VickiRene’s website, to smile and greet everyone I encounter. I have no illusions that I “pass,” and I know I’m not by nature an outgoing person. I am determined to do the best that I can, and not to run away from myself either. I step into the hall and tingle with excitement and anticipation. I do my best feminine walk (from the hips, girl!), and arrive at the dining room. Suddenly, my eyes go “macro,” as I try to take in everything I see. There is a large room filling with some of the most beautiful people I have ever seen, and nearly all of them, except the genetic women, are just like me. I cannot keep myself from smiling.

The next morning, another-first-time-in-my-life, being dressed en femme to start the day. Although not a morning person, I arrive at the dining room already smiling. Later in the afternoon I decide on another never-done-that-before thing-fingernail polish, on my own, grown-long nails. This starts out being a minor disaster, and I am asking myself, how hard can this be?

By dinner, my jaw muscles ache from smiling, but I am describing my experience to anyone who asks as, fantastic. This is Friday, the evening for one’s best dress, and for something called the Princess Promenade. I wear an evening dress, which is a light peach color, and has an elegant flow to it. When I return to the dining room for the event, I find it is now filled with really beautiful people. Those who want to enter the promenade line up, and at this point I find myself thinking the unthinkable-would I actually want to do that? Won’t I look foolish, at my age? Then I find myself doing the unthinkable, and joining the line to be escorted into the spotlight and introduced. At that point my eyes go out of focus, I forget everything I know about how to walk, how to stand, and feel that I shuffle off into the darkness after my 15 seconds in the spotlight. But I did it!

Saturday morning brings the announcement of the Princess and her court, then a group photo on the boardwalk. In the evening is the talent show after dinner. Though not something I would ordinarily find entertaining, I seem to have a different mood in my black evening dress and four inch heels. And all too soon it is all over.

Back home, I find a certain joy, and in some odd way I am proud of myself for presenting the person who is JamieGhee for the first time, for bringing her out from the deepest part of her closet. I met so many beautiful people. For all that I wasn’t-like passable-there is so much that I was, for myself, perhaps for others.


If you have a story to share you’d like to share with the readers of Crossdresser Heaven, please email me at vanessalaw@crossdresserheaven.com and let me know you’d like me to share with others. Please include:

  • Your femme name
  • A brief introduction (1-2 sentences about where you live, how old you are and such)
  • Your story (if you go over 700 words I’m going to edit you down :) )
  • Optional – A photo of you (no nudity please)

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