Categories: Crossdresser How To

2 Crossdressing Mistakes We All Make

Categories: Crossdresser How To
Comments: 6 Comments
Published on: August 28, 2010
Two Crossdressing Mistakes

Two Crossdressing Mistakes We All Make

I gazed around the room. Every lady was well put together – to an individual her outfit was coordinated and appropriate to her build. Her makeup was subtly and carefully applied. Her hair styled with the love of a salon owner. These ladies had clearly learned how to crossdress, they had avoided the most common crossdressing mistakes and then some.

Yet as I looked at many of these lovely ladies I couldn’t help thinking “man in a dress”. That thought stunned me – these women could all be role models in the crossdressing community. They had cultivated their appearance and would be the envy of any just beginning their crossdressing journey. It also made me pensive – if that thought so quickly entered my mind, and I admired their appearance so, surely I’ll be read even more quickly? In fact, what hope is there for any of us to pass as a woman?

After mulling it over for a few days I finally figured it out – these ladies made 2 crossdressing mistakes. Mistakes we all make.

Crossdressing Deportment School?

Men are relaxed to the extreme. When they sit they spread out, taking as much space as they need to fully relax every body part. When they walk they take up space, and they slouch. Their shoulders stoop over as if finally bending to years carrying the heavy load of masculinity. Woman don’t slouch – woman sit and stand up straight. Watch woman next time you’re out shopping, and compare their posture with the men you see. If you can catch a multi-gendered checkout line the difference will be immediately obvious.

Now “stand up straight” might bring to mind a relative you know who is in the military. There’s nothing feminine about standing to attention as if preparing to salute the president. To get a more feminine posture you need to think “in and up”. Roll your shoulders back and gently drop them. Pull your elbows in and lift your torso up as if you’re  a puppet on a string, with the string coming through the crown of your head. Lean slightly forward and then soften your posture. To make good posture a part of your daily routine I highly recommend taking up yoga – many of the poses will help undo years of bad habits that gives us all the inevitable slumping forward.

The first mistake these lovely ladies made was to slouch.

Life’s Not That Bad, Is It?

It was clear all the ladies were deep in concentration – learning the latest tips on how to present in a more feminine manner. Their brows were furrowed, their lips pressed together in a contemplative frown, and their face pulled down as if they were wrestling with the information presented. It was also clear that this look was working against their desires to pass as a woman. For most men their face “at rest” is in a slight frown, yet most woman have a more radiant, open and uplifted face. This can prove quite a challenge for transgender woman, since most of the time we don’t think about what our face is doing until we express an emotion.

What can we do about our propensity to frown? Find something joyful in every moment, and let your joy show. That’s much more effective than plastering a fake smile on your face – and as a bonus you’ll feel better too :)

Do you want to avoid other crossdressing mistakes?

If you want to hone your feminine presentation I highly recommend you purchase the ultimate crossdressing guide. And practice practice practice! You’ve spent years hiding your true self, and it will take time to break through all the masculine walls you’ve built around yourself.

With love and blessings,
Vanessa

Be Encouraged By What You Learn

Be Encouraged by What You Learn Crossdressing

Be Encouraged by What You Learn Crossdressing

At the start of every yoga class we’re urged to set an intention for the practice. The intention is set as something to grasp onto when the practice gets tough. When your muscles are aching and sweat is dripping down your forehead you can come back to your intention for strength and motivation.

Recently I made my second trip to an advanced yoga practice. The first one had been a miserable experience. Overwhelmed and unable to follow along with the instructor I spent most of the class lying on my mat. It had taken a few months before I braved the advanced class again, yet the memory of my failure was still in my mind.

I knew that the class was going to be just as hard, and I would feel overwhelmed, tired and frustrated. So I chose my intention carefully. This practice I was going to focus on one thought:

Be Encouraged By What You Learn

Be encouraged by learning, not by perfection. Even if I try a pose and fail, my muscles become stronger, I learn more about the technique. Even if I’m too tired to stand up, I watch others and learn from them.

Throughout the practice I felt encouraged by my frustrations. I felt encouraged when I couldn’t do a pose. I felt encouraged when my muscles ached and my body quivered. I felt encouraged by what I was learning in every moment.

Crossdress and Be Encouraged

Sometimes crossdressing is like the most difficult yoga practice. You’re frustrated because you can’t seem to get your makeup right. Your clothes don’t fit properly, you struggle to walk in heels and you ladder your stockings. Every step you take as a crossdresser seems manly, clumsy and awkward. You may even have people laugh at you, or stare with intense interest. Your feet might be hurting, sweat ruining your makeup and the teller calls you, ‘sir’.

Despite being excited at the prospect of a wonderful day spent en femme you end your day in despair. Cursing your transgendered misfortune.

But Be Encouraged By What You Learn

It’s easy to get caught in the perfection trap. Always striving for perfect, yet never achieving it. Each failure chipping away at your pride until you barely feel like wearing anything at all. Don’t let your own judgments stop you from crossdressing.

Wear those clothes, do your makeup, put on that wig. Do your feminine best, and be encouraged by what you learn. Even if all you learn is how ill suited that red sweater is for your figure, have fun being awfully gorgeous.

We’re all just practicing our femininity, some of us have been at it a while longer, that’s all.

Cool or Warm Skin Tone

Comments: 10 Comments
Published on: September 12, 2009

You ladies are in for a treat today! After a few months of cajoling my beautiful wife agreed to write an article for Crossdresser Heaven. Not only does she bring all the insights of gained growing up as a girl, she has an uncanny knack for choosing great colors! Perfect for today’s topic.

She’s chosen to write under a pseudonym, as you’ll see. I know she’d love to hear from you about her article. Perhaps if we get enough comments I can convince her to write another article :) So please take a moment to comment after reading the article – and be beautiful!

Crossdresser Skin Tone

Have you ever seen someone wearing an amazing color blouse that made them look fantastic? This then led you to promptly go and buy something similar and the result was less than desirable. The problem could be your skin tone.

Skin tone is broadly classified into cool and warm tones. To determine what skin tone you are try these following tests:

The Vein Test

This is the most widely used test. Look at the underside of your arm in natural light. If your veins appear bluish you are cool toned, if they appear greenish you are warm toned. If you have a mixture of blue and green veins you are probably neutral. Consider yourself lucky.

The Gold/Silver Test

Stand in front of a mirror in natural light. Hold up a piece of silver and gold jewelry or fabric to your face one at a time and examine. If the silver makes your face light up, you are most likely cool toned. If the gold makes you look fresh and alive, you are probably warm toned.

While the above tests can act as guidelines, genetics are also important. Your skin, hair and eye color can assist you in determining whether you are warm or cool toned. It should be noted that there may be exceptions to this rule.

Warms tend to have a golden or apricot undertone. Their hair tends to have hints of orange, yellow, red or gold. Eye color tends to be amber, dark brown, hazel, or green.

Cool skin often has a pink or rosy undertone. Their hair often contains blue, blue-violet, silver, drab, and ash undertones. Eye color tends to be light blue, gray-green, blue green, turquoise, gray-blue, black or cool brown.

I am an exception to the genetic rule. My natural hair color is drab brown and I have green eyes with flecks of hazel. Yet my skin tone is definitely cool.

Why is this Important?

A Crossdressers Color Pallette

A Crossdresser's Color Pallette

Choosing the correct color based on your skin tone is an important part of looking your best. This applies to cosmetics, clothes and even hair color [if shopping for wigs or having highlights or tinting done]. Wearing the wrong hue can take your skin from looking radiant and glowing to appearing tired, drained and even unhealthy.

Warm tones

These will look their best in earthy hues either muted or crisp: Think yellows, oranges, bronzes, gold, peaches, brick reds, earthy greens, mocha browns and ivory. Yellow based colors makes your complexion sparkle. You also look better in ivory than pure white and black worn close to the face can make you appear washed out.

Makeup and hair color: Foundation is yellow based. Hair colors that have a warm overtone will look more natural on you. To complement your skin go for golden to dark browns, rich warm auburns as well as red and golden highlights. Avoid the following hair colors; ash, blues, purples and whites.

Cool tones

Both sexes will look stunning in rich jewel tones such as vibrant emerald green, royal or icy blues, rosy pinks, silvers, plums, magentas, blue-based reds and pure white. Blue based colors look best. You look better in pure white than ivory and you can easily wear black.

Makeup and hair color: Foundation is pink based. These people can wear shades of ash browns, cool blondes such as platinum, blue-blacks and unnatural colors like mahogany, burgundy and fire engine red can also be worn by this shade as well. Avoid tinting your hair in any of the following colors: orange, some reds, bronze, yellow or gold.

Neutral tones look amazing in any color though often they tend to pull towards cool or warm due to personal preferences.

Color Seasons – Winter, Spring, Summer and Autumn - are used to break down cool and warm colors further.  Summer and Winter are “cool” seasons; Spring and Autumn are “warm” seasons.

Now it’s time to play and compare different colors and tones against your skin. Some will look terrible, others okay and some will make you look as if you have just stepped out a fashion magazine. It is okay to wear some colors that don’t look 100% on you [since who of us can afford to totally revamp our closet?] Just keep these for bottoms and wear a top that complements your skin color.

Go and have some fun now that there is a change of seasons and fashions.

Xena

Hair is the Hardest for Crossdressers to Get Right

Comments: 9 Comments
Published on: September 8, 2009
Cross-dresser hair tips

Cross-dresser hair tips

Did you look like a cyclone warning the first time you tried to do your hair? Of all the mysterious things about womanhood, the secret to a good hair style is perhaps the most elusive for crossdressers. Many of us enjoy long hair just once a month, and often without the nurturing guidance young girls get while growing up.

If you wash your hair twice a week you’re already above average for a guy. Never mind conditioners, blow drying, styling gels, mousse and a bag full of other hair essentials. So where does the confused crossdresser get started?

Find Your Crossdressing Hair Style

The first thing to decide is whether you’ll be wearing a wig or styling your own hair. For some, genes have already made the choice for them. Some things to consider:

Advantages of wearing a wig while crossdressing

If you opt for a wig you’ll find three wonderful things. Firstly, your hair can be as long as you want right away without waiting months and years for it to grow. Wigs are also better for those who crossdress part time, and need to be fully male the rest of the time (dress codes at work, for example).  The final advantage to wearing a wig is variation – you can have a blonde bob one day, and long brunette curls the next day.

Advantages of crossdressing with your own hair

For the last few months I’ve been growing out my hair – I’m recovering from my wig phase :) . Going natural has it’s own advantages. Firstly, there’s no need to worry about your hair flying off. Getting your hair styled in a salon is tremendous fun – my trips to the salon count among my favorite few hours in the month. If you’re sensitive to the heat your own hair is much cooler than wearing a wig.

For this post I’ll provide a few crossdresser hair tips for those going natural. Look here for more information about how to wear a wig.

Crossdresser Hair Tips

Wash your hair a few times a week with a high quality shampoo. Many of the grocery store brands will leave your hair oily, or strip off too much oil. Personally, I use Nioxin, which you can find at Costco, in your favorite salon or online. Try not to wash too often, otherwise you’ll deprive your hair of natural oils.

Condition your hair every time you shampoo. 2 in 1 hair products are faster to use, but less gentle on your hair. Again use a high quality salon brand like Nioxin, their conditioner is the best I’ve ever used. It has a light mint scent and causes your scalp to tingle all over while conditioning. It’s also okay to use conditioner when you haven’t washed your hair.

Condition the ends of your hair. Don’t pour all the conditioner on your scalp, that will leave your hair heavy and give you the ‘drowned rat’ look. Definitely not sexy! Use most of the conditioner on the ends of your hair, which is most susceptible to split ends and drying out.

Don’t brush your hair when it’s wet. That tugging sensation you feel as you try to brush out your knots is hair being removed from your head. Pulling out your hair is not a good look.

We’ll leave the styling tips for a future post. If you have a crossdresser hair care tip you’d like to share, please leave a comment below and let the other ladies know what has worked for you.

Hugs,
Vanessa

Flaws? What Flaws?

Concealer and foundation cover discoloration, even out skin tones, and smooth skin’s surface. There is a multitude of formulas and colors to choose from, which can get very confusing.

Concealers come in creams, sticks, or liquids. Regardless of formula, the key is to find a shade with the same undertone as your skin. The days of white raccoon eyes have gone out with the 80’s.

I find cream concealers easier to work with. With your middle or ring finger (never your index finger), very lightly smooth a small amount under the eyes or over discoloration. Dab on blemishes. The warmth of your finger will soften the cream and help it go on easily. Don’t worry about blending just yet because you’ll do that as you work foundation over your skin.

Some cosmetic companies offer a green tint to neutralize ruddiness or purple to minimize a sallow complexion. They do help, but don’t go overboard. A little goes a long way.

The multitude of foundation colors and formulas can seem overwhelming. I’ll keep it simple. If you have oily skin, look for a liquid in an oil-free formula. If you’re dry, a cream might be more to your liking. Normal or combination skin can go with a liquid formula for normal skin. Unless you work in the theatre, stay away from “pancake” makeup or too heavy an application. Instead of covering flaws, it just makes people want to take a trowel to your face.

Foundations are also affected by weather. During hot, humid summers you may prefer a sheer liquid, preferably with sunscreen. In dry, cold months, when your skin gets tight, a cream can feel better. Remember to also adjust your moisturizer.

The hardest part about foundation is finding the right shade. The idea is not to change your skin tone, but to work with it. Find three shades that look similar to your skin color. Dip a Q tip into the first color. Draw a strip vertically near the jaw line. With fresh Q tips, do the same with the other two shades. The strip that disappears is the color that best matches your skin. If none of them disappear, try three more. *This is important; once you’ve stripped your face, walk outdoors with a mirror to see which one matches the best. Florescent lights change the look of foundation.

Hint: if you wear Porcelain or Ivory, you probably look like a geisha. Most of us, with the exception of Nicole Kidman, have more color in our skin, especially in sunnier regions of the country.

Most formulas dry quickly, so instead of dabbing foundation around the entire face and then spreading it around, work one area of the face at a time. Don’t rub it in. Use the middle or ring finger to smooth it over the skin, like spreading icing. Makeup sponges work well. Wet the sponge first so that it does not soak up and waste too much foundation. Foundation brushes are nice for blending along the hairline and under eyes, but can take too much time with overall application.

Take foundation to just under the jaw line. If you did a good job matching color, you won’t need to take it down the neck. Foundation on the neck just makes a mess on your clothes. My neck tans, but my face only freckles. I pick a foundation closer to my neck color, thereby avoiding that mask look. This is why it is best to test your foundation close to the jaw line.

Set foundation with a translucent, loose powder. If you are a lady of color, you’ll need powder with some pigment. Most loose powders only come in fair, medium and dark. Blend two colors to get the right shade.

Use a velour powder pad to press loose powder into foundation. Then dust excess with a large brush. This method wastes less powder. Wash pads with soap and water, and air dried.

Some foundations come in cream/powder compacts. There is no need to set with loose powder. Carry one for touch ups. If you use the sponge applicator, be sure to wash it regularly. Same with your pads in pressed powder compacts.

Newest on the market are mineral foundations. They are highly pigmented powders, applied with a special brush. They can take a little practice. The key is to moisturize well before applying, otherwise it will look splotchy. Mineral foundations feel light on the skin, but give good coverage.

Hope this helps. Next time, I’ll cover eyes.

Christina Evans
Makeup101byevans@yahoo.com
www.linkedin.com/in/makeup101byevans

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