Be Encouraged by What You Learn Crossdressing

At the start of every yoga class we’re urged to set an intention for the practice. The intention is set as something to grasp onto when the practice gets tough. When your muscles are aching and sweat is dripping down your forehead you can come back to your intention for strength and motivation.

Recently I made my second trip to an advanced yoga practice. The first one had been a miserable experience. Overwhelmed and unable to follow along with the instructor I spent most of the class lying on my mat. It had taken a few months before I braved the advanced class again, yet the memory of my failure was still in my mind.

I knew that the class was going to be just as hard, and I would feel overwhelmed, tired and frustrated. So I chose my intention carefully. This practice I was going to focus on one thought:

Be Encouraged By What You Learn

Be encouraged by learning, not by perfection. Even if I try a pose and fail, my muscles become stronger, I learn more about the technique. Even if I’m too tired to stand up, I watch others and learn from them.

Throughout the practice I felt encouraged by my frustrations. I felt encouraged when I couldn’t do a pose. I felt encouraged when my muscles ached and my body quivered. I felt encouraged by what I was learning in every moment.

Crossdress and Be Encouraged

Sometimes crossdressing is like the most difficult yoga practice. You’re frustrated because you can’t seem to get your makeup right. Your clothes don’t fit properly, you struggle to walk in heels and you ladder your stockings. Every step you take as a crossdresser seems manly, clumsy and awkward. You may even have people laugh at you, or stare with intense interest. Your feet might be hurting, sweat ruining your makeup and the teller calls you, ‘sir’.

Despite being excited at the prospect of a wonderful day spent en femme you end your day in despair. Cursing your transgendered misfortune.

But Be Encouraged By What You Learn

It’s easy to get caught in the perfection trap. Always striving for perfect, yet never achieving it. Each failure chipping away at your pride until you barely feel like wearing anything at all. Don’t let your own judgments stop you from crossdressing.

Wear those clothes, do your makeup, put on that wig. Do your feminine best, and be encouraged by what you learn. Even if all you learn is how ill suited that red sweater is for your figure, have fun being awfully gorgeous.

We’re all just practicing our femininity, some of us have been at it a while longer, that’s all.

Other Transgender Posts

• Why do men cross dress? (218)
• Are You Ashamed Of Being a Crossdresser? (88)
• I married a cross dresser (62)
• Going Out Crossdressed For The First Time (52)
• Living between the man I am and the girl I want to be (42)

She’s chosen to write under a pseudonym, as you’ll see. I know she’d love to hear from you about her article. Perhaps if we get enough comments I can convince her to write another article So please take a moment to comment after reading the article – and be beautiful!

Crossdresser Skin Tone

Have you ever seen someone wearing an amazing color blouse that made them look fantastic? This then led you to promptly go and buy something similar and the result was less than desirable. The problem could be your skin tone.

Skin tone is broadly classified into cool and warm tones. To determine what skin tone you are try these following tests:

The Vein Test

This is the most widely used test. Look at the underside of your arm in natural light. If your veins appear bluish you are cool toned, if they appear greenish you are warm toned. If you have a mixture of blue and green veins you are probably neutral. Consider yourself lucky.

The Gold/Silver Test

Stand in front of a mirror in natural light. Hold up a piece of silver and gold jewelry or fabric to your face one at a time and examine. If the silver makes your face light up, you are most likely cool toned. If the gold makes you look fresh and alive, you are probably warm toned.

While the above tests can act as guidelines, genetics are also important. Your skin, hair and eye color can assist you in determining whether you are warm or cool toned. It should be noted that there may be exceptions to this rule.

Warms tend to have a golden or apricot undertone. Their hair tends to have hints of orange, yellow, red or gold. Eye color tends to be amber, dark brown, hazel, or green.

Cool skin often has a pink or rosy undertone. Their hair often contains blue, blue-violet, silver, drab, and ash undertones. Eye color tends to be light blue, gray-green, blue green, turquoise, gray-blue, black or cool brown.

I am an exception to the genetic rule. My natural hair color is drab brown and I have green eyes with flecks of hazel. Yet my skin tone is definitely cool.

Why is this Important?

A Crossdresser's Color Pallette

Choosing the correct color based on your skin tone is an important part of looking your best. This applies to cosmetics, clothes and even hair color [if shopping for wigs or having highlights or tinting done]. Wearing the wrong hue can take your skin from looking radiant and glowing to appearing tired, drained and even unhealthy.

Warm tones

These will look their best in earthy hues either muted or crisp: Think yellows, oranges, bronzes, gold, peaches, brick reds, earthy greens, mocha browns and ivory. Yellow based colors makes your complexion sparkle. You also look better in ivory than pure white and black worn close to the face can make you appear washed out.

Makeup and hair color: Foundation is yellow based. Hair colors that have a warm overtone will look more natural on you. To complement your skin go for golden to dark browns, rich warm auburns as well as red and golden highlights. Avoid the following hair colors; ash, blues, purples and whites.

Cool tones

Both sexes will look stunning in rich jewel tones such as vibrant emerald green, royal or icy blues, rosy pinks, silvers, plums, magentas, blue-based reds and pure white. Blue based colors look best. You look better in pure white than ivory and you can easily wear black.

Makeup and hair color: Foundation is pink based. These people can wear shades of ash browns, cool blondes such as platinum, blue-blacks and unnatural colors like mahogany, burgundy and fire engine red can also be worn by this shade as well. Avoid tinting your hair in any of the following colors: orange, some reds, bronze, yellow or gold.

Neutral tones look amazing in any color though often they tend to pull towards cool or warm due to personal preferences.

Color Seasons – Winter, Spring, Summer and Autumn - are used to break down cool and warm colors further.  Summer and Winter are “cool” seasons; Spring and Autumn are “warm” seasons.

Now it’s time to play and compare different colors and tones against your skin. Some will look terrible, others okay and some will make you look as if you have just stepped out a fashion magazine. It is okay to wear some colors that don’t look 100% on you [since who of us can afford to totally revamp our closet?] Just keep these for bottoms and wear a top that complements your skin color.

Go and have some fun now that there is a change of seasons and fashions.

Xena

Other Transgender Posts

• Why do men cross dress? (218)
• Are You Ashamed Of Being a Crossdresser? (88)
• I married a cross dresser (62)
• Going Out Crossdressed For The First Time (52)
• Living between the man I am and the girl I want to be (42)

Cross-dresser hair tips

Did you look like a cyclone warning the first time you tried to do your hair? Of all the mysterious things about womanhood, the secret to a good hair style is perhaps the most elusive for crossdressers. Many of us enjoy long hair just once a month, and often without the nurturing guidance young girls get while growing up.

If you wash your hair twice a week you’re already above average for a guy. Never mind conditioners, blow drying, styling gels, mousse and a bag full of other hair essentials. So where does the confused crossdresser get started?

Find Your Crossdressing Hair Style

The first thing to decide is whether you’ll be wearing a wig or styling your own hair. For some, genes have already made the choice for them. Some things to consider:

Advantages of wearing a wig while crossdressing

If you opt for a wig you’ll find three wonderful things. Firstly, your hair can be as long as you want right away without waiting months and years for it to grow. Wigs are also better for those who crossdress part time, and need to be fully male the rest of the time (dress codes at work, for example).  The final advantage to wearing a wig is variation – you can have a blonde bob one day, and long brunette curls the next day.

Advantages of crossdressing with your own hair

For the last few months I’ve been growing out my hair – I’m recovering from my wig phase . Going natural has it’s own advantages. Firstly, there’s no need to worry about your hair flying off. Getting your hair styled in a salon is tremendous fun – my trips to the salon count among my favorite few hours in the month. If you’re sensitive to the heat your own hair is much cooler than wearing a wig.

For this post I’ll provide a few crossdresser hair tips for those going natural. Look here for more information about how to wear a wig.

Crossdresser Hair Tips

Wash your hair a few times a week with a high quality shampoo. Many of the grocery store brands will leave your hair oily, or strip off too much oil. Personally, I use Nioxin, which you can find at Costco, in your favorite salon or online. Try not to wash too often, otherwise you’ll deprive your hair of natural oils.

Condition your hair every time you shampoo. 2 in 1 hair products are faster to use, but less gentle on your hair. Again use a high quality salon brand like Nioxin, their conditioner is the best I’ve ever used. It has a light mint scent and causes your scalp to tingle all over while conditioning. It’s also okay to use conditioner when you haven’t washed your hair.

Condition the ends of your hair. Don’t pour all the conditioner on your scalp, that will leave your hair heavy and give you the ‘drowned rat’ look. Definitely not sexy! Use most of the conditioner on the ends of your hair, which is most susceptible to split ends and drying out.

Don’t brush your hair when it’s wet. That tugging sensation you feel as you try to brush out your knots is hair being removed from your head. Pulling out your hair is not a good look.

We’ll leave the styling tips for a future post. If you have a crossdresser hair care tip you’d like to share, please leave a comment below and let the other ladies know what has worked for you.

Hugs,
Vanessa

Other Transgender Posts

• Why do men cross dress? (218)
• Are You Ashamed Of Being a Crossdresser? (88)
• I married a cross dresser (62)
• Going Out Crossdressed For The First Time (52)
• Living between the man I am and the girl I want to be (42)

Concealers come in creams, sticks, or liquids. Regardless of formula, the key is to find a shade with the same undertone as your skin. The days of white raccoon eyes have gone out with the 80’s.

I find cream concealers easier to work with. With your middle or ring finger (never your index finger), very lightly smooth a small amount under the eyes or over discoloration. Dab on blemishes. The warmth of your finger will soften the cream and help it go on easily. Don’t worry about blending just yet because you’ll do that as you work foundation over your skin.

Some cosmetic companies offer a green tint to neutralize ruddiness or purple to minimize a sallow complexion. They do help, but don’t go overboard. A little goes a long way.

The multitude of foundation colors and formulas can seem overwhelming. I’ll keep it simple. If you have oily skin, look for a liquid in an oil-free formula. If you’re dry, a cream might be more to your liking. Normal or combination skin can go with a liquid formula for normal skin. Unless you work in the theatre, stay away from “pancake” makeup or too heavy an application. Instead of covering flaws, it just makes people want to take a trowel to your face.

Foundations are also affected by weather. During hot, humid summers you may prefer a sheer liquid, preferably with sunscreen. In dry, cold months, when your skin gets tight, a cream can feel better. Remember to also adjust your moisturizer.

The hardest part about foundation is finding the right shade. The idea is not to change your skin tone, but to work with it. Find three shades that look similar to your skin color. Dip a Q tip into the first color. Draw a strip vertically near the jaw line. With fresh Q tips, do the same with the other two shades. The strip that disappears is the color that best matches your skin. If none of them disappear, try three more. *This is important; once you’ve stripped your face, walk outdoors with a mirror to see which one matches the best. Florescent lights change the look of foundation.

Hint: if you wear Porcelain or Ivory, you probably look like a geisha. Most of us, with the exception of Nicole Kidman, have more color in our skin, especially in sunnier regions of the country.

Most formulas dry quickly, so instead of dabbing foundation around the entire face and then spreading it around, work one area of the face at a time. Don’t rub it in. Use the middle or ring finger to smooth it over the skin, like spreading icing. Makeup sponges work well. Wet the sponge first so that it does not soak up and waste too much foundation. Foundation brushes are nice for blending along the hairline and under eyes, but can take too much time with overall application.

Take foundation to just under the jaw line. If you did a good job matching color, you won’t need to take it down the neck. Foundation on the neck just makes a mess on your clothes. My neck tans, but my face only freckles. I pick a foundation closer to my neck color, thereby avoiding that mask look. This is why it is best to test your foundation close to the jaw line.

Set foundation with a translucent, loose powder. If you are a lady of color, you’ll need powder with some pigment. Most loose powders only come in fair, medium and dark. Blend two colors to get the right shade.

Use a velour powder pad to press loose powder into foundation. Then dust excess with a large brush. This method wastes less powder. Wash pads with soap and water, and air dried.

Some foundations come in cream/powder compacts. There is no need to set with loose powder. Carry one for touch ups. If you use the sponge applicator, be sure to wash it regularly. Same with your pads in pressed powder compacts.

Newest on the market are mineral foundations. They are highly pigmented powders, applied with a special brush. They can take a little practice. The key is to moisturize well before applying, otherwise it will look splotchy. Mineral foundations feel light on the skin, but give good coverage.

Hope this helps. Next time, I’ll cover eyes.

Christina Evans
Makeup101byevans@yahoo.com
www.linkedin.com/in/makeup101byevans

Related Crossdressing Posts

• Tools of the Trade (3)
• Crossdressing Makeup – The Basics (0)
• 3 Transgender Makeup Secrets you won’t learn at home! (11)
• Makeup mistakes crossdressers can’t afford to make (4)
• Crossdressing Makeup Tips – The order to put on makeup for cross dressers (12)

It’s Sunday morning as I’m writing this. After spending most of Saturday reading in the park I’m now fully dressed and sitting at home in front of my computer with an itch to go somewhere. I feel, quite literally, all dressed up with nowhere to go.

I’d like to go somewhere, but feel as though anywhere I go will only be to share Vanessa with the world. I had thought about going to church. It’s too late in the day now, and I’m not sure I could go without causing a stir anyway. I’ll need to ponder this one for a while – I would like to make church as Vanessa a regular occurrence (come as you are…).

Shopping came to mind – it’ always seems to. I know I’ve spent too much money the last few weeks (I bought two great workout pants from Lucy, replenished my makeup supply and did electrolysis every week last month), and know that I wouldn’t be able to go to the store without buying something. Staying away from shopping centers is probably best for my budget.

So as much as I would like to go out today, I feel as though I’m stuck in my crossdresser closet. *sigh* Since I’m here I might as well make the best of it.

How Big Is Your Crossdresser Closet?

My comfort with crossdressing in public seems to wax and wane. When I first started out, just getting dressed in the privacy of my own apartment was a break through. Complete with breastforms, makeup and the necessary jewelry to accent my look I felt liberated.

Eventually I found the courage to join a crossdressing club, and once a month I would spend an evening dressed with other crossdressers. I felt as though I had finally come out the crossdressing closet. Looking back I realize that I had merely found a larger closet, but I can’t deny how fulfilling the experience was, and how edifying the experience is for others.

When I was most comfortable crossdressing in public I would regularly go to trans-friendly clubs, and occasionally go out as Vanessa during the day. Even then, I always had to dig deep to find the courage. Before I would go out a hundred reasons would go through my head as to why I should stay home.

Today I’m comfortable presenting as a more feminine man in public, whether it’s wearing subtle makeup, nail polish or feminine cut jeans and shirts. I’m a bit uncomfortable going out fully dressed as Vanessa, though I’ll do it occasionally. Every time I go out I have a wonderful time, and return home wondering why I ever had second thoughts.

Other Transgender Posts

• Why do men cross dress? (218)
• Are You Ashamed Of Being a Crossdresser? (88)
• I married a cross dresser (62)
• Going Out Crossdressed For The First Time (52)
• Living between the man I am and the girl I want to be (42)

Foundation

Makeup application begins with concealer, foundation, and powder. Unless you are using a mineral powder foundation, the concealer and foundation can be applied with your finger-not your hand. Use the middle or ring finger to gently smooth on concealer or foundation. The index finger pulls too much on the skin.

Sponge applicators are okay, but they tend to absorb more foundation than you need. Dampen the sponge first to eliminate that problem. Sponges also breed bacteria, so either use a new sponge with each application, or wash it with soap and water after each use.

Foundation brushes are nice for smoothing out foundation and concealer around the eyes. For the full face, they can be time consuming. Foundation brushes are flat with a curved top and wedged bristles.

Powder

For applying powder, big, fluffy brushes are fun, but they can waste product. I recommend a cosmetic foam pad. Press pad lightly into powder, tap off excess, and then press powder onto face. I usually start under the eyes to keep concealer from creasing, and then work my way around the face until powder disappears. Use that big, fluffy brush to dust away any excess. The pads are large enough to use a different half and/or side with each application. Once both sides have been used, wash with soap and water. They last for ages, but it doesn’t hurt to toss them out after six months.

Blush

Most of us think of blush brushes as smaller versions of a powder brush. Like a powder brush, I find they waste too much product and you end up with apple cheeks. The brush I use is a larger, fluffier version of the foundation brush. Instead of rubbing the top of the brush into your blush, place the side of the brush on the blush palate and give it a little wiggle. The wedged bristles pick up just enough blush. With a light touch, brush over the cheekbone in a comma stroke from the corner of the eyes towards the nose.

For a more dramatic look, use the same technique layering color on. It is easier to add color than trying to take it off. In case, you do apply too much, no worries. Simply take your big, fluffy powder brush and make large circles over the blush. This will soften the color and eliminate any lines of demarcation.

Eye Shadow

Next, the eyes. Find a small version of the foundation brush-flat, with curved top and wedged bristles. With this brush, apply a light-colored shadow from the lashes all the way up to the brow. Next find a small round brush that is cut in such a way that the top comes to a point. That point should fit into the eye crease. Apply a darker shade in the crease. (I’ll have a whole article on eye makeup at a later date.)

Must haves: powder pad, powder brush, blush brush, and two eye shadow brushes. Also needed in your makeup bag: cotton pads (100% cotton), Q-tips, sponge applicators (usually come with eye shadows), and an oil-free eye makeup remover. NEVER use Vaseline or baby oil on eyes.

Nice to haves: foundation brush, brow brush or comb, eyelash curler (if you have the patience), and a small angled brush for detail work around the eyes. I rarely, if ever use a lip brush, but they are useful for dabbing on a touch of gloss.

Hope this helps. Thanks for all the great questions.

Christina Evans, Makeup Artist, Phoenix, AZ
Email Makeup101byevans@yahoo.com with your beauty questions or to book an appointment

—
Christina, these are great tips! When starting out I made the mistake of applying blush with the a large fluffy brush. As light as I would apply the makeup I couldn’t figure out why I always looked like a clown. Now I use four types of brushes every day. The Flawless Application Face Brush for foundation and bronzer; the Soft Focus Shadow Brush for blush (much better control when applying blush! No more clown cheeks); the Concealer Brush for applying concealer; and the Double Ended Shaping Brush for applying eye shadow. I’m eagerly looking forward to your series on eye makeup. I’m reasonably adept at applying mineral eye shadow, but completely flummoxed as to use the sponge applicators that come with other eye shadows.

Thanks for sharing your tips with us. Dear readers, please send Christina your questions, or better yet – book an appointment with her if you’re near Phoenix!

Related Crossdressing Posts

• Flaws? What Flaws? (5)
• Crossdressing Makeup – The Basics (0)
• 3 Transgender Makeup Secrets you won’t learn at home! (11)
• Makeup mistakes crossdressers can’t afford to make (4)
• Crossdressing Makeup Tips – The order to put on makeup for cross dressers (12)

Skincare should not be an expensive, complicated regimen. The objective of department store sales associates is to sale you as much stuff as possible. So that clutter of products on the counter can seem overwhelming.

You already get up every morning to wash your face and brush your teeth. What if a good skincare routine involved just two more steps, would you do it?

Step 1: Use a facial cleanser made for your skin type. Oily-skinned individuals prefer gel and foam cleansers for that squeaky clean feel, but they don’t dry out the skin like bar soap can. Dry-skinned individuals prefer creamy-type cleansers, which leave a just moisturized feel to the skin.

For those who aren’t sure where you fall, here’s a clue. Oily people know they’re oily. Dry people know they’re dry. If you’re not sure-a little dry on the cheeks, a little oily on the forehead and nose-you have combination skin. Most people do. I have yet to find that elusive “normal skin-type” person. For those with combination skin, the type of cleanser you choose is a matter of personal preference. Try different types until you find one you like. And don’t spend tons of money. Grocery store brands are fine. The only no-no is bar soap. It is too waxy and contains deodorants and other chemicals not made for the face.

For those still battling acne, find a cleanser with an anti-bacterial ingredient, like triclosan or salicylic acid. My favorite is Bath and Body Works Antibacterial Hand Soap. It’s sometimes on sale 4 for $10.00. Buy the gel. The creamy cleanser burns the eyes.

Step 2: Most people have no idea why they should use a toner, so they don’t. Toners wipe away any residue from your makeup and cleanser. They can soothe irritated skin. But most importantly, they help your skin absorb moisture. Skin is like a sponge. When a sponge is damp it absorbs spills easier. If your face is damp, it absorbs the moisturizer better.

It is best to stay away from astringents, even with oily skin. They have too much alcohol and are drying. People with oily or acne-prone skin do everything to dry it out. Problem with that is skin needs moisture. By drying it out, the oil glands work harder to compensate; thereby, causing the skin to become oilier.

My favorite toner is good, old fashioned Witch Hazel. It’s a natural astringent that won’t dry out your skin. Look for it in the first aid section of your neighborhood pharmacy, next to alcohol and hydrogen peroxide. And it’s cheap.

Step 3: Daytime and nighttime moisturizers do two different things, so yes, you need both. Daytime moisturizers act like a protective shield over the skin, keeping out debris, while locking in moisture. Daytime moisturizers absolutely, positively, without exception should have an SPF 15. If your moisturizer has less than 15 or none at all, apply the moisturizer then a sunscreen.

SPF 15 is a total block. Higher than that is just marketing. The difference in protection between SPF 15 and SPF 50 is only about 1-2%, but the additional chemicals can be double.

When you are at rest, the body repairs itself. Nighttime moisturizers increase the process by penetrating the skin to firm and smooth fine lines. In the past, moisturizers could only help stop further damage from happening. New technologies help active ingredients penetrate deeper into the skin, actually repairing damaged skin. (If you are a sun goddess or smoker, no amount of moisturizer will repair the damage.)

You don’t have to spend lots of money. Oil of Olay and L’Oreal are just as good as anything you might spend $80-100 for in department stores. The key is consistency. Cleanse, tone, and moisturize, every morning and every night. Three basic steps to better skin.

So what is all that other stuff for: eye creams, exfoliants, masks, makeup removers, and more? I’ll touch on that next time. So stay tuned.

Christina Evans
Makeup101byevans@yahoo.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/makeup101byevans

—
Vanessa here – Christina, thank you for your first article on a skin care routine. I concur completely, skin care is one of the most important aspect of looking good. Dermalogica is a mid-range skin care line that I enjoy using. I use Dermalogica Special Cleansing Gel to cleanse and Dermalogica Multi-Active Toner for my toner. I normally don’t wear sunscreen, but rely on the sunscreen in my mineral makeup instead.

Related Crossdressing Posts

• How To Look Like A Woman – A Cross Dresser Skin Care Routine (2)