I lived a life of being a celebate.I became very outspoken at 13yrs of age when i had to decide that “THIS IS MY LIFE ” and i was not going to make my parents happy or anybody .It was a case of going MAD ,DIE within or just exist  or GET UP AND STAND ON MY GROUND FOR WHO I AM .This is the way i came to the world .God made us in his image and likeness as the bible says but not the physical part but the soul.God cant be male and female if you interprete the bible.

Though ,did make both male and female ,he didnt create “FREAKS “.
Genetically ,our body can go haywire.I remember ,a photo when i was 3 yrs old .It was on christmas day .I took my girl dress out of me and undressed my 2yr old brother .I WORE HIS CLOTHES WHICH I STILL REMEMBER THE COLOURS but i cant remember what colour  the dress look like.I made a bam bam hairdo for him ,handed my teddy bear and took his flash gordon type car of red ,green and white and played with it .Everyone came laughing as i recall still clear in my head at 52 and took photos.It wasnt easy growing up but at 13,for the first time in my life i knew there was someone just like me.He had a sex change and became a girl .She was a hollywood actress named christine .I became Chris then and today ,i am called Christiaan Knight by deed poll.

Ever since then ,i had more battles and each time ,i grew stronger and developed an outspoken ,brave personality.And my only friend i had was my dog and she would sit with me and we would gaze at the stars as i would talk to GOD.God was my strength and is still today my GOD ,MY FRIEND.He answered my specific pray ,when i prayed and asked him “WHY DID U CREATE ME THIS WAY “.I CANT HAVE A NORMAL LIFE NOR CAN i SERVE YOU AS A PRIEST ” .SO U GIVE ME SOMEONE WHO WILL LOVE ME FOR WHo I AM  UNCONDITIONALLY and my prayers were specific.He lead me to my wife.It wasnt easy as it was a long distance relationship.Her parents couldnt accept our relationship as she was a hetrosexual and so am i but im invisible.God made man and woman ,i am not disputing .God did say man must not lie with man and visa versa.But he didnt say anything about transgender .As a matter of fact,he said in Isaiah ,i cant remember which chapter but he said concerning Eunuchs that it is not their fault.I take it that he is refering to transgender and those who are born different.
A God of LOVE will never create babies with 2 sex organs ,a limb growing out of the stomach nor conjoin twins.These are biological defects and so why cant i be a genetic misfit.I am telling you the truth as God is my witness.There are many suicide transgenders.Life is made so difficult.We have no rights to our spouse ,no medical insurance ,no civil rights for marriage in many countries and yet why would a healthy ,mentally sound person would want to mutilate their bodies .And what about risk factors .taking hormones and other complications.KNOWing all this ,i had my surgery and took out what was so obvious and i didnt have any surgery done below due to complications that may arise in future .I would love to  be wholesome but sex was not important .I AM NOW PEACEFUL and one with myself.So ,i do hope ,all christian pastors and self proclaimed executioners ,dont have blood in your hands thinking you are speaking for God and quoting bible verses.
After 21yrs of knowing my wife and 18yrs in a relationship of which 13yrs ,we were married in UK and later moving to her home country Malaysia,the pressure of bureaucratic red tape ,drove us apart and christian influence on my wife that said our marriage of 13yrs is a sin ,she separated with me .This was in 2009 on valentines day.I could get angry with God but i couldnt be angry with him.He gave me what i asked knowing the outcome well ahead. Today ,i still live with my ex wife as i still love her and she is going out with a toyboy who is half her age AND PRETENDS THAT its ok.But she as a christian woman ,i believe it is a bigger sin but not to her cos he is a MAN.I was her only love and she was a virgin when i met her and she was faithful and most loving .We were inseparable until my nightmare started when she left the catholic church and went into the penticostal church.Christian people destroyed my marriage and ruined my life.I am not angry with her anymore nor with christians. I went through great depressions and overcome them with God by my side .U see dear friend ,the world can reject me ,but if i dont have God on my side ,i would be totally lost.My family have been a source of strength .At first it was hard for them but i have always been ME since birth and it wasnt hard for them to accept .At work ,i had a normal working life even before my change .I WORE TROUSERS AND I WASNT PREPARED TO DRESS LIKE A DOLL.

Today ,i thank God for the life i had with my wife and now accepting that this world is never meant for me ,i have began a journey of selflessness.I am more spiritual now than ever before.Perhaps ,this has been my true purpose in life chosen to serve God for greater glory for him.I cant give my heart to anyone though at times i am lonely and just want to share my life with doing things like my wife and i used to do .Simple things like baking a cake together ,she does all the work and i do the beating.Now ,i see myself in the future to  serve God by helping others who are in most need of love.I do hope this will clear the confusion .Its not about sex its about one of gender identity.One is preference and the is other ,innate.Today ,christians have become like the Sadducee and pharishess.I thank you for hearing my story.GOD BLESS

God gave me my gender. I’m blessed (cursed?) to have two, and to experience life as both a man and a woman. Despite all the hardships, I believe this was the life journey I was meant to take. I have learnt much and grown tremendously as a person.

Africa has many issues. It breaks my heart when I see gay people tortured and maimed. I weep when I hear about ‘corrective rape’ even in the most developed country in Africa, South Africa. Africa has it’s share of hate, poverty and desperation. There are also many in Africa suffering from gender dysphoria (I hear there cries for help often on this website).

To your comment about money for sex change being used to help people in Africa, you should also tell the person who bought a $2m house, or the family that lives on junk food and requires $100K in surgeries because they didn’t care for their diabetes, or the smoker who burns $100s a month and requires expensive care for their lung cancer. We all have a choice how we invest our money, but aligning our inner and outer gender is the difference between life and death for many.

I urge you to consider your own generosity before you judge others.

God gave me my gender. I’m blessed (cursed?) to have two, and to experience life as both a man and a woman. Despite all the hardships, I believe this was the life journey I was meant to take. I have learnt much and grown tremendously as a person.

Africa has many issues. It breaks my heart when I see gay people tortured and maimed. I weep when I hear about ‘corrective rape’ even in the most developed country in Africa, South Africa. Africa has it’s share of hate, poverty and desperation. There are also many in Africa suffering from gender dysphoria (I hear there cries for help often on this website).

To your comment about money for sex change being used to help people in Africa, you should also tell the person who bought a $2m house, or the family that lives on junk food and requires $100K in surgeries because they didn’t care for their diabetes, or the smoker who burns $100s a month and requires expensive care for their lung cancer. We all have a choice how we invest our money, but aligning our inner and outer gender is the difference between life and death for many.

I urge you to consider your own generosity before you judge others.

Excerpt from Psalm 139.

Really America, what’s going on with you guys? Maybe you need to visit Africa to get in tune again with what’s important and what’s not. That sex change you pay for would do wonders for some impoverished kids down here…

God bless.

Excerpt from Psalm 139.

Really America, what’s going on with you guys? Maybe you need to visit Africa to get in tune again with what’s important and what’s not. That sex change you pay for would do wonders for some impoverished kids down here…

God bless.