Crossdresser Heaven

My boyfriend is a crossdresser, what do I do?

You’re likely feeling a bit shocked – after all, this is unlikely to be something you expected when you entered the relationship. Your boyfriend was probably wracked with fear when you first found out, and it’s likely he didn’t tell you himself because he feared that you wouldn’t accept his crossdressing. He may be both nervous and eager to share more details with you. Don’t let him go faster than you feel comfortable with. After all, he has been dealing with this for years and you only just found out.

You shouldn’t fear that you’re in this alone – It is surprisingly common for men to crossdress, at least occasionally. Some estimates say that roughly 5% of men are transgendered. There are many organizations that help wives and girlfriends, I recommend Tri Ess as a great place to start. They offer a supportive environment in which you can share your situation with other woman who are going through the same thing.

It could also be that you’re thinking about this a bit too much – if you have fun together when he’s crossdressing, go with it. Don’t feel like you need to conform to an outdated set of societal norms!

A great resource is a book written by Peggy Rudd called ‘My Husband Wears My Clothes’. I’ve included a link below. This book was written by a woman who’s husband is a crossdresser. Peggy provides insight, comfort and support for any woman who finds out that her beloved is a crosdresser.



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About the Author

Vanessa Law is a women enjoying the freedom to be who she is every moment of her life! She blogs about the transgender journey at Please comment below and tell me what you think!

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  1. Shannon says:

    My boyfriend came out that he was a crossdresser near the beginning of our relationship. I was open to it and thought it would bring us closer. He had been in a relationship for 15 years with the mother of his kids, and she did this for him. After finding out that he had cheated on me several times with her (because she was more accepting I suppose), I found it hard to do when he’d request it. I’ve always been more of a submissive girl, wanting a more dominant manly man. I do love him so much, but often wonder if I’m really what he needs. He’s asked to have a 3some with another man, and we followed through with it. He tells me he enjoys dressing up because it makes him feel sexy. I notice a big change in him whenever he’s looking fem. The way he walks, talks, and even looks at me completely changes. I feel so awkward at times. I have to play a role acting as if it’s turning me on, when in my mind, I just want to run for the door or make him stop. He means everything to me and his happiness is so important. I wonder if my discomfort should be addressed or I should leave him? Bringing another man into the bedroom was difficult. I only want one. I’m worried that maybe he finds me boring, or might be bisexual. It’s exciting having a man that is different from most, and I consider myself lucky. I just want the uneasiness to go away. Any suggestions are appreciated. We’ve been together 8+ years now.

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