A Wife's Crossdressing Success Story

This week I am truly honored to hear from Amy. This is the first time that a genetically born woman has shared her crossdressing success story on Crossdresser Heaven. Amy’s story is a blessing to all of us, and shows us that love’s embrace can strengthen even with – and sometimes because of –  crossdressing.

If you’d like to share you crossdressing success story, please take a moment to submit your story. I’d especially like to encourage wives and girlfriends of crossdressers to share their successes. Even if you’re still struggling with your loved one’s crossdressing your small successes will bring encouragement to many others who are walking the same journey.

Meet Amy

Hello, I’m Amy; I’m a 36-year old female who lives in a small town in Georgia.

Amy’s Crossdressing Success Story – A Wife’s Perspective

I don’t know if I can publish a story being a female, but I am so inspired by all of your stories that I had to tell mine. I met my husband about 5 years ago at a pizza restaurant where we both worked at the time. I had identified myself as a lesbian for 10 years, but hadn’t found the right woman. I had had two boyfriends, both of whom validated my reasons for choosing the lesbian lifestyle, even bearing a child from one of them.

But this one, 9 years younger than me, there was just something about him I couldn’t put my finger on, but I knew I had to have him. I heard was a preacher’s son and had a good reputation, unlike the last one who’d left me and my son 5 years earlier. Anyway, we hit it off and dated for 4 years before getting married. I always felt like he was more of a woman in bed, which naturally I liked, having been a lesbian before.

Now I had a kid, plus living in the Bible belt is not easy when you’re not living the “straight” and narrow, so I no longer had the desire to seek out a woman. So he was perfect, the best of both worlds. Little did I know just how perfect.

I knew he liked wearing my tank top I once put on him, but I thought it was no big deal since it never came up again. Later I found out that he was attracted to me from day one, having listened to my lesbian escapades. It seemed a part of him identified with/wanted to be one of those women. This might sound strange, but one night 3 years into our relationship, I heard in a dream or vision from a beautiful goddess (crazy, I know) telling me that I needed to tell him that it was ok to wear women’s clothes; that it was an ancient part of him that would be very healing if he would just allow it to happen.

I told him this, but he said nothing and I forgot about it. It wasn’t until our wedding night that I experienced the full extent of my husband’s desire to cross dress. We went and bought lingerie that I was hoping he would especially love on me. It seemed he cared more about himself wearing the clothes than me. I was actually jealous of a robe!

This was such a downer for me on our honeymoon. But how could I have known? We hadn’t been able to live together during our engagement, between his conservative background, and my not wanting to shack up only to be abandoned again. And he’s quite shy about such things.

Well, I am happy to say after nearly 2 years we have adjusted and grown together, and through a lot of communication and encouragement have created a beautiful relationship that is like no other. Thanks to Vanessa’s website, Vicki’s wise words for Christian Cross Dressers, and all the CD stories, I have come to understand why my husband feels the way he does; it even endears me to him more.

The stories have made me cry at times. One day I saw on Oprah a transgendered man (woman now) and her wife who would shop for jewelry together, and something about their story, their kinship made me cry as well. It wasn’t tears of sadness, but more of a cleansing and a relieving. It felt like, “Yes, that is it”, like a resounding truth.

Now I dress him up all the time. Occasionally he will put something on, but he is more passive and the thrill for him is someone else doing it to him. I no longer see his desire to wear women’s clothes as taking away from me. In fact, I think this has strengthened me to be more, to explore my masculine side, my dominating side (grin), and now I play video games with him and fix things around the house.

I’ve even explained to my 11 year old son that his step dad feels good in women’s clothes, and he was ok with that. He actually said it explained a lot and seemed relieved to now know the truth. (I’m sure he’s noticed him wearing my jeans and pj’s from time to time.)

My dream is for us to move to a place where he could be comfortable to be himself, be it in women’s clothes or makeup or even transitioning to transgendered. This whole experience has taught me that gender is a very complex thing and that we all have a varying degrees of masculinity and femininity in us.

It has taught me to question, what makes us a man or a woman? Doesn’t our Creator create us to express ourselves the way we want? Isn’t there a feminine aspect to our Creator that he/she wants to shine through us? What would the world be like if we were more free to express both male and female sides of us, or just one if that’s what gives us joy? I think it would be an infinitely better world.


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Amelia walkerHaylie SJoanna KnightKayla CLaura Recent comment authors
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Bon bon
Bon bon

Love how your understanding and compassion have made your marriage more binding.as for me my wife and nextdoor neighbor knows how I feel when I get home and just get the days tension off me . I do that by the way of feeling the soft side of me by putting on soft and frilly atar.my neighbor loves it when I visit her .


This design is wicked! You most certainly know how to keep
a reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos,
I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job.
I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it.
Too cool!


My lovely wife knew of my crossdressing before we were married. She does not participate or encourage me in any way. I keep my body and legs smooth shaven; and would love for my wife to encourage me; even better, order me to wear sheer nylons on a regular basis for her inspection, seeing as I keep my legs so feminine. She could even tease me about my crossdressing; calling me her feminine, husband “bitch”. Thus; I would enjoy a dominant side to her nature. I would so much wish that she could accept and encourage my feminine side and… Read more »


I am living this same exact truth : ) I identified as lesbian before I met my husband. I now identify as bisexual and just a few months ago found out that he enjoys drag and that he too is bi… It was definitely an adjustment. It was scary for me at first. I felt lied to and I felt the same jealousy of the clothing that you describe. But after spending one whole day with him in drag. I saw something beautiful happen between us and I love him more than I ever thought I could. I get the… Read more »


Hey therr i totally love ur post. Therr was a few times i saw myself transformed like a woman in my mirror and loved the results than wanted to see Vannessa thats my name luke urs. Omg then i really felt the feme in me i started doin it more often. But i was very satisfied.


How uplifting! Especially since I just read a depressing article, written from the wife’s perspective, about how her husband came out to her as trans and she just couldn’t bring herself to accept it. She even said there was something sad about tights on male legs and she wasn’t happy about her husband wearing women’s jeans–like, big deal. So he had to move out. This woman seemed very conservative, so kudos to Amy for going against the grain in the Bible belt and not only accepting her husband’s​ female side, but embracing it! I find it wonderful that she appreciates… Read more »

Kayla C
Managing Ambassador

Thanks for sharing your story! I am so happy for you and your husband. It is great that you accept each other completely. I believe that is the way love should be in a relationship.

Joanna Knight

Amy , You and your man / woman have opened my eyes and mind! I’m a 55 year old crossdresser and I have only come out to 2 vary close friends in my real world ! I have opened up to others on here And I never knew that there was so many like me in this world. I’m happier when I’m dressed as a woman I just cant live as a woman full time because I have not told my family that I love being dressed as a woman. I just don’t know how they would take it! I… Read more »

Haylie S

I shared with my wife that I crossdress, but only after she found my stash of clothes. But since coming out to her things have never been better. One, now I can do it in front of her and it helps keep me happy. Two, now I got someone to go panty or clothes shopping with. I hope everybody can have a accepting wife as mine. It really helps out.

Amelia walker

Many years ago my sister asked my wife how she would feel if she found out I was a transvestite (my sister being a confirmed homophobe) to which my wife just laughed and said “As if”. Rolling the years. forward, I outed my self to her about 6 months ago. As I told her she put her head down and was silent,when she lifted her head she said slowly “after all these years why didn’t you tell me,didn’t you trust me?”. Since then we have had a great time going shopping together, looking at clothes and make up and just… Read more »

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