For as long as I can remember, I have been fascinated with certain women’s clothing. I think it really started in junior high school. A friend of mine would always dress in heels or boots, a tight-fitting leather jacket, sometimes leather pants or a skirt. I was already attracted to her, but I was always captivated by her attire. I always wondered what it would feel like to wear such clothes and boots.
I’ve had those feelings and curiosities for my entire life. There were times when I would think about buying myself a pair of boots that I could wear around the house and just enjoy without anyone knowing. However, I would quickly dismiss it and go on with whatever I was doing at the time. This happened several times over the last few years.
However, something changed within me after my mom passed away from cancer. I feel that as a method of coping with the loss, I finally acknowledged and embraced my feminine side. I actually went through with my original idea of buying a pair of boots to wear and enjoy at home. Once I put them on, it felt so natural and so right. I had very little trouble in adapting to walking in high heels. I still am working on wearing them for long periods, however, it’s getting easier.
After purchasing my first pair of boots, I wanted more. I would buy more pairs of boots. I started looking at other things as well. I’ve bought several pairs of leggings, a skirt, several dresses, and a pair of leather pants. When I change into any of these, I feel more at home with myself than I ever have in the past. I love the feeling of a pair of hose on my legs and a nice dress to pair with whatever boots I choose to wear.
About a month ago, I came out as a crossdresser to a select few of my friends and both of my sisters. The support I have received from them has been incredible. I was also so happy that I could share my outfits with someone and talk about it with them. Additionally, a few weeks ago, I finally went out in public partially dressed. I met my sister and my niece for brunch and I wore my boots. I had my pants tucked into my boots and it felt great to be out in public. If anyone was staring at me weirdly, I didn’t notice, nor did I care.
I have also been getting my nails done regularly now. I no longer care what people at work think of me. My friends at work compliment me on them and support me. Sometimes, some of the guys will make a comment which I will probably nonchalantly blow off or ignore, or they ask me about them and I tell them the truth: I have long nails because I want to have long nails.
I realized I would need a name for this new persona. I chose my first name when I first started dressing a few months ago. It was pretty easy to pick. I am a fan of pro wrestling and my current favorite wrestler’s ring name is Charlotte. She is everything that I was attracted to as a man: Tall, blonde, blue eyes. So, that name seemed to fit with me. My last name, I chose as I was joining this community here at CDH. I thought for a while and chose the last name of a fictional character that also happened to be one of my lifelong heroes.
However, I am still so new to this so I have yet to complete my look. I do not have a wig, nor do I really know anything about the proper application of makeup yet. I have looked at YouTube videos and felt a bit overwhelmed. However, after further study of these instructional videos and some trial and error, I will eventually get there. That is one of the obstacles I hoped to overcome by joining CDH. I hope to get to know all of the ladies here. I hope this gives you all an insight into Charlotte Kirk and how I began my journey. I just wish I had begun it sooner as most of you who probably share the same wish!
- Did you have a particular girl in junior high school or high school who wore sexy clothing and boots who served as an inspiration for you to one day do the same?
- Have you perfected the art of makeup application yet? And if so, how did you do it?
- Do you wish you would have started full up cross dressing from top to bottom with the wigs, makeup, clothing, and footwear much earlier in life than you actually did? And at about what age would you have started your full up cross dressing if you could go back in time and start your full up cross dressing from top to bottom – makeup and all?
Thank you girls for taking the time to read my article. Now, if you have some time to spare, could you send in either a response to my article or to one or more of the questions I’ve posed to you above?