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For most of my early years up through college and the military I pretty much kept my hair very short. Even though I was occasionally dressing up I was very closeted and had bought an inexpensive wig just to compliment whatever I decided to actually dress up with.
By then I was married and was working jobs that were not conducive to having long hair, so I kept it short. Eventually I had an office-type job that was very liberal and could care less about hair length so I took advantage and decided to let it grow out and, to my surprise, it grew very straight, thick, and very fast. Before long, my hair was lush and down to my shoulders. Taking advantage of this opportunity I also began to dress up in earnest. My dressing became more than a desire; it became an obsession!
My wife, at first, was not bothered much by my occasional dressing and never objected to my hair length which, by then, went past my waist. Wearing it that long meant I had to figure out how to wear it up so it wouldn't be in the way all the time so mostly it was gathered up on top of my head in a bun or a long ponytail down my back.
At first I thought taking care of my hair would be problematic. It turns out all I needed to do, besides washing and conditioning, was brush it and leave it alone. Eventually I thought I should try and see if I could have it styled which turned out to be a challenge. A stylist worked on it a few times and, while I liked waves and curls she commented on how stubborn my hair was to style. My hair was stubborn and bobby pins, barrettes and other clips wouldn't stay in. I really couldn't afford the bi-weekly visits to the salon so I pretty much asked my wife to give me a monthly trim and keep the length down to my shoulders. Eventually I found ways to tame my hair and have it behave.
Raising my hair has caused a few stories, however.
During the time I started to let it grow my older brother teased me quite a bit. I was defensive about it but that didn't stop him, of course. He ran a car repair shop and I worked there for a summer helping out. My hair was almost to my shoulders by this time and I think I was wearing just a headband to hold it in place. One day he had me crawl under a car, for what reason I've forgotten. To do the job I had to get on a "creeper", one of those low-slung, 4-wheeled carts used by mechanics to access under a car without jacking it up. You can probably guess what happened. Getting under was fine, but getting back out was when the drama started. Rolling back out some of my hair got trapped in one of the wheels! Rolling back and forth only made it worse. I knew yelling for help would only make my brother laugh and tease me even more than usual so I did the only thing I could think of and yanked my head up far enough to rip a sizeable amount of hair out and it coiled in the wheel. I didn't say anything and acted normal as I rolled out. What choice did I have? While my brother was occupied elsewhere I managed to remove the evidence and nothing was ever said but my scalp paid a costly price. I lost about an inch and a half diameter hunk of hair! After that I also had a few occasions of catching my blowing loose hair in the wind while rolling up my car window but I wised up and was always able to rescue myself from losing any more hair.
One year my wife and I decided to see if my hair would dread up, just for fun. She made small braids in my hair and I wore it like that for a couple months but decided I didn't like it and asked her to un-braid it. It was a warm summer day so we went outside and it took about an hour to remove the rubber bands and untwist the braids. As I shook my head around to help my hair free itself we felt a very strong and sudden shaking in the ground. An earthquake! We stood there, amazed, as we watched the trees and utility poles sway while we tried to stay upright. It was over in, maybe, a minute or two. As we were trying to gather our wits we heard a voice coming from a house across an alley behind and above us. "You okay down there?" the neighbor asked. We both sort of laughed and made some trite comments like "Oh yeah!" and "That was a big one!" It wasn't till after we went back into our house that I looked in the mirror and I realized my hair, now totally unbraided, was standing out in all directions all over my head, like a cartoon character. It was then that I realized why the neighbors seemed so concerned. They already knew I wore my hair long and straight, so they must have thought the earthquake scared the bejesus out of me from fright.
There is one very odd thing that my hair does by itself. I enjoy finger-combing my hair when it is down but occasionally I will feel a thick spot, like a snag, near the bottom of a single strand. When I singled out this one hair I looked through a microscope and found that one hair tied itself into a knot about an inch or two from the bottom. I had no idea what caused it but I did a little research and subsequently found that this happens to others. Some say that split ends can be the culprit but I rarely have those. Or it is a result of having curly, coily hair but my hair is very straight. I have come to not worry about how and why it happens, I just clip off the knot above the knot.
Remarkably I have noticed only a few gray hairs appearing now and then but I just ignore them. My hair does what it wants and I have very little control over it.
Thanks for taking the time to read my hair raising article! Please take a few minutes to either send in a comment to my article or an answer to one or more of my questions posed to you below:
- When you dress up in full up femme mode, do you wear a wig or use your own natural hair?
- How many wigs do you own in your selections of wigs?
- What color and length of hair do you think is the best fit for you while you’re getting your total girl on?
I look forward to your comments or answers to my questions.
Most sincerely, Mary
Nearly twenty years I wore long hair just below my shoulders. It was fun playing with curlers to get a natural wave for different looks. I loved putting it up in a high ponytail when out and sometimes a bun . Dog ears,braids,updos and styles I saw in models in magazines. It was a lot of work but enjoyed it till I started going grey and wanted something more age appropriate in a ladys style. Yea I have stories too about hair getting caught in things like earring getting tangled and hair clips falling out but no big thing. Every girl should experience it. I still have wigs for different looks and experiences both short and long as well as hairpieces and extensions. It really. helps if you boyfriend is a hair stylist too lol.
I wrestle with letting it grow or not. I would love it longer and since my hair is really thick, I think I could get away with it. However, I have a bob and a long wig as my go to pieces.
I wrestle with letting it grow or not. I would love it longer and since my hair is really thick, I think I could get away with it. However, I have a bob and a long wig as my go to pieces.
I now am in my early 60's and thankfully I still have a full head of thick hair. I've traditionally not kept it short but also not long either. It's all gray now and have thought once I retire, 11 months, to start growing it out. Always wanted to get it done in a salon and that might be something I do when I no longer have to go to work.
I now am in my early 60's and thankfully I still have a full head of thick hair. I've traditionally not kept it short but also not long either. It's all gray now and have thought once I retire, 11 months, to start growing it out. Always wanted to get it done in a salon and that might be something I do when I no longer have to go to work.
Used to keep mine short...and then the 'rona shut everything down...like my favorite little coffee/book store and the quaint mom and pop barber I would visit every other weekend. Sadly those places won't be back and I refused to go to one of popular box stores that conveniently stayed open through it all. Well, now my hair is back down to my waist and I'm pretty much enjoying having long hair again!
Used to keep mine short...and then the 'rona shut everything down...like my favorite little coffee/book store and the quaint mom and pop barber I would visit every other weekend. Sadly those places won't be back and I refused to go to one of popular box stores that conveniently stayed open through it all. Well, now my hair is back down to my waist and I'm pretty much enjoying having long hair again!
Mary,
I have let my hair grow longer than it ever has. At 64, it is gray. And very thin on top. I’ve always had very thick wavy hair. I could almost pull off the look my avatar has, except for the thin neck. Mine is 17” and only looks proportional because of my huge head. I’m really wondering what kind of hairstyle can overcome that.
Gwyn
Mary,
I have let my hair grow longer than it ever has. At 64, it is gray. And very thin on top. I’ve always had very thick wavy hair. I could almost pull off the look my avatar has, except for the thin neck. Mine is 17” and only looks proportional because of my huge head. I’m really wondering what kind of hairstyle can overcome that.
Gwyn
I love your hair. I have started to grow mine out as I have not found a wig that is authentic enough. I've grown it down to just above the shoulder but it seems to have stopped there. I am going to try a bunch of concoctions that have been proven to make hair grow faster, thicker, stronger. (done a lot of research on this!) Still, I will need MORE hair. This is where the extensions will come in. Real hair extensions are expensive but they will look REAL. / Thanks for the stories! I kinda 'felt' it when the creeper ran over your hair. Thank goodness you love your long hair so much that you wouldn't let that get in the way! That would have been me! I know I don't have to tell you how lucky you are. You don't seem to be someone who would just cut it becasue you needed a change either. Very Admirable. Claudia
I love your hair. I have started to grow mine out as I have not found a wig that is authentic enough. I've grown it down to just above the shoulder but it seems to have stopped there. I am going to try a bunch of concoctions that have been proven to make hair grow faster, thicker, stronger. (done a lot of research on this!) Still, I will need MORE hair. This is where the extensions will come in. Real hair extensions are expensive but they will look REAL. / Thanks for the stories! I kinda 'felt' it when the creeper ran over your hair. Thank goodness you love your long hair so much that you wouldn't let that get in the way! That would have been me! I know I don't have to tell you how lucky you are. You don't seem to be someone who would just cut it becasue you needed a change either. Very Admirable. Claudia
Hi Mary. I have not worn my wig in over a year as my hair is now past my shoulders. When I let my hair down I think it gives my face a feminine look just because of how the hair frames my face. I have colored it twice now, mostly to cover the gray. Not ready for the mostly gray head of hair. Thinking of the next hair coloring to go with something further from my natural color. Probably not going to do any major styling specially if it takes a lot of time to keep up.
. . .Cassie
Hi Mary. I have not worn my wig in over a year as my hair is now past my shoulders. When I let my hair down I think it gives my face a feminine look just because of how the hair frames my face. I have colored it twice now, mostly to cover the gray. Not ready for the mostly gray head of hair. Thinking of the next hair coloring to go with something further from my natural color. Probably not going to do any major styling specially if it takes a lot of time to keep up.
. . .Cassie
I have never worn my hair long, even when in the late 60's and 70's when it was fashionable for a young man to grow his hair out to some extent than another. Mostly it was two things, my conservative family, and this was a biggie for me to, I was always wanting to be somewhat counter culture to what my peers were doing. I know many guys grew their hair out to be counter the their parents, but if the "in crowd" was doing a certain thing, I often did the opposite.
Now I'd love to grow my hair long, but it is now very thin and wouldn't make for a nice look anymore. When I was young I had thick and lustrous nearly black hair which my Mom was always jealous of, as mine was so much nicer than hers!
So of course I were a wig when I dress up thoroughly, and always when I go out.
Thanks for a great article!
Amy