Are You like Cinderella Too?

Thank you Lisa for a wonderful article. I am looking forward to a night out but don't believe that will happen for a while. I'm 6.1 also and have only been in the sunshine as Bree 4 times. Bree is more on the terror side when out but still exciting. I had a full blown panic attack in the ladies restroom at a rest stop in Illinois. (Not so panicked that I couldn't grab a selfie though). I believe the confidence will come in time. After I get rid of the nagging doubts I am looking forward to the beautiful person that is Bree.
Huggs GF...keep writing.

Bree

Hi Lisa,

Thought provoking Article. Thank you for writing it. I can feel your inner struggle in your words. I can understand the alone time as Lisa being your best time.

My first night out was in 1995. I was terrified before leaving the safety of the makeup artist Salon into the busy parking lot walking to my car parked in the multi level parking garage; however the terror was matched with excitement. I never felt more alive. I wore 4" inch heels, mini skirt, black pantyhose and a white top. I'm 6'2"...I guess I wasn't trying to blend in. I got to the tgirl venue and experienced euphoria, friendship,...me! I have had road bumps on the way but once I was out, I, me, could never go back in. I have had the greatest experiences of my life as me since then. My glass slipper....is inside me...my soul, my mind, my self. I've grown so much since then...evolved, became......me.

Thank you for the great article. I have ventured out as Paula a few times. The thrill of riding in the elevator with other people and being treated as a lady was increadable. The joy and exitment of that first night still overwhelms me. The sales clerks chatting with me and commenting on my necklace, my nails, being called Ma'am. I know GG's hate it but I love it.
so i guess the glass slipper for me is the memory. The more i dress out in public the less special it feels, that first time was such a high and so much prep and thought went into it.

Love
Paula

Great article Lisa. I wish I could provide a great experience out of the closet, but right now the door is stuck. However, I do experience that rush of endorphins when crossdressing. Interestingly enough, I felt that high after my last makeover for the rest of the night. Partly because the artist was so successful in making look so real that I finally believed in the possibilities that I did not have after my very first makeover. Yes, I hope someday we can get out and feel like ourselves. Baby steps I guess for us girlfriend. Great job.

Hugs

Abby

Thanks Lisa for sharing that Beautiful and deeply moving article your girlfriend
Kelly Ann❤

Just a wonderful article Lisa. Thank you so much for sharing with us all. Inner peace with who I am, after so many years knowing I’m a dresser, yet that alludes me. I still have many moments of shame. That is my issue, can’t seem to get over this bit of shame I feel. It’s so hard.
Anyhow, thanks for sharing dear.

❤️❤️❤️ brianna

Hi Lisa, it's Scarlett and finally getting around to answer your question about finding my glass slipper. I found my glass slipper about two weeks before my wife and I moved into this dream home of ours about two and a half years ago. It was then, I decided to sit my wife down and have "The Talk" about my thrill of cross dressing. And it took me several years to get up the balls to have that awkward feeling talk with her. I've written a well read article about "The Talk" and how you should have it and what to say during this talk with your wife or SO concerning your thrill of cross dressing that started for most of us when we were very young boys - I started at age 9 and I'm 65 now.

I took my wife all of the way back to that very first day I discovered two drawers of the most sexiest black lingerie I had ever seen in my young life. The family was going to be away for at least three more hours so I found those gorgeous items while snooping around in my mom and dad's off limits bedroom. I'll spare you all of the details of my first thrill of cross dressing that went on for at least two hours that day.

Anyway, back to having that talk with my wife, she new about my cross dressing by finding those items you discussed above behind after a day of dressing up as Scarlett and it always seemed at the end of my cross dressing sessions I was always rush, rush, rushing around to put everything back in it's place. And on numerous occasions, my wife would find a skirt, top, dress, a pair of hose or tight that just kinda blended in with the chair or couch or bed I would lay the items over. I would usually have things scattered in every room all over the house from cross dressing all day and it was a real challenge to find it all and put it all back in its place when Scarlett time was over. After a while, instead of walking up to me and asking me if certain items belonged to me, she would politely and respectfully fold things neatly up and put them on the bed in the spare bedroom where I hid most all of Scarlett's things.

During the talk with my wife I covered everything from that very first day up through the days of dressing and not dressing due to demands of job and school and raising a former wife and two boys. I was also the head coach of their baseball teams and just simple not only didn't have the time for Scarlett but even lost the urge to be Scarlett.

I covered the purges with her, I showed her photographs of Scarlett's fifty greatest hits I had posted on line. She felt extremely awkward while looking at the photos. I think she felt a little jealous of Scarlett and may have felt Scarlett was prettier and sexier than she was. She held back the questions about my thrill of cross dressing I felt she needed answers to so I offered up the questions and answer to her. The typical ones like "Are you gay" "Do you find men attractive when you are dressed up as Scarlett" "How long did you keep this a secret from me before I starting finding your feminine items througout the house?" Did you think I would divorce you or call for some sort of separation because of your thrill of cross dressing?" "How many people have you shared your thrill of cross dressing with?" "Does anyone on your side of the family know you've been doing this since you were a child?" "Where do we go from here with your cross dressing?" "Can't you stop and do you find a need to cross dress for as long as you possible can?" "Why do you feel a need to dress up in lady's clothing?"; "Do you get a level of excitement when you dress up as Scarlett and why?" "Do you take photos of you dressed up as Scarlett?"

I went through every question I thought she should asked and offered up the answers to everyone of them as well! It was about a three hour session with me doing about 90 percent of the talking and then I just told her I was tired of feeling guilty, shameful, and embarrassed about my need to dress up as a girl and didn't want to continue on with having those feelings anymore. I told her I wanted everything out in the open and continued conversations and possilby us being able to shop together for women's clothing. And I finally asked her with all of this storage space in all of these spacious closets in our new dream home we were about to move into, if I could bring most all of Scarlett's things out in the open and start storing them in some of our closets in our new home.

When she didn't hesitate and she said, "Yes, I'll have no problem with that at all now that I have a complete understanding how important the feminine side of you is to your happiness and mental well being and the fact that I will always remain the first and most important love of your's!"

At that time, Lisa, is the moment I finally found my glass slipper! All of the feelings of guilt, shame, embarrassment, and secretly having to try and hide it all from my Sexy Redhead, my soul mate forever, and the total love of my life finally came to an end and her acceptance of my thrill of cross dressing and the constant weight of those awful feelings noted above with anxiety added in there as well, I could finally become Scarlett through and through without having to deal anymore with any negative thoughts I felt towards the need to be Scarlett as well as "Handsome Husband" to my wife.

I love both sides of my life now and I'm at total ease with the world and my wife in regards to my thrill of cross dressing and making the total transition from "Handsome Husband" to "Pretty, Cute, Sexy, and Classy Scarlett! And I don't have feelings of coming down off that pink cloud high when I have to transition back into "Handsome Husband" mode. That really never had much effect on me because I felt as comfortable and as confident with myself in either mode quite frankly. But now I knew I didn't ever have to feel uncomfortable ever again about when it was time to get my total girl on as Scarlett the following week. It just gave me something really special to look forward to now rather than being scared and having my wife walk in unexpectedly two hours early from work with no warning at all and catch me in full up Scarlett mode like she did a few years back! Now we have open lines of communication where I tell her if I'm going to dress up as Scarlett on a particular day and she will call me and give me a two hour heads up before she arrives at the house to give me plenty of time to get into her preferred "Handsome Husband" mode of me! So there's absolutely no more shock, no more surprises, and total calm and bliss when I get my total girl on as Scarlett. I wouldn't want to be Scarlett 24/7 anyway. After I take my makeup off with those Neutrogena makeup remover towelettes and then get in the shower and take a soft scrungy thingy to wash the rest of the makeup off, my face needs a two day break from the makeup application and removal process to start feeling totally healthy on my face again and ready for another Scarelett session. I honestly don't know how girls, ladies, women do it every single day and night! If I had to do it on a constant daily and nightly basis, my face would be shredded in two weeks time! Their faces must be a heck of a lot tougher than mine for sure!

Are there certain acceptable limits placed on me by my Sexy Redhead in regards to my cross dressing - You Bet! However, they are few and extremely acceptable to me and very easy to adhere to and have been discussed with girls on this site at great length many times before. And the level of acceptance from my wife from the day of "The Talk" up until this very day has grown exponentially since that talk over two and a half years ago.

I can shop for things for Scarlett the same time I'm helping my Sexy Redhead pick out items for her! We can even check out separately though the same cashier at each and every store now without any embarrassing feelings from me or from her. She even picks sexy items off the the racks now she thinks would look super on Scarlett! I never ever thought I would see that day coming! Starting yesterday, I can now show her as many photos of Scarlett as I want and her not be embarrassed or me not be embarrassed. There seems to be a sense of pride from both of us about how well I can make a full transition from handsome guy mode to pretty girl mode. She's happy about my membership and willingness to help other girls on this site become the best possible cross dressers they can possibly become. She and I both realize that God has me on this site for a very important reason and that is to help as many of these girls on this site as possible overcome these overwhelming feelings of shame, guilt, secrecy, embarrassment, etc., etc., etc., and let them all now that cross dressing is healthy for one's soul, mind, and overall well being. It's OK to cross dress! It's fun to shop for lady's footwear and clothing! It's much more normal behavior, we've found out by being a member of this site and others like it. And so many cross dressers, unfortunately, will always have to stay deep in a closet about their huge secret for maybe as long as they live which would be extremely unfortunate! Heck, just a few years ago, I thought I was going to have to stay deep in that closet about my thrill of cross dressing and the need to become Scarlett on a regular basis. I'm so happy and thrilled I'll never ever have to go back in that closet again because of the unconditional and never ending love my Sexy Redhead will always have for both me and the feminine side of me. I honestly think being a girl helps me be able to relate to her and other women as well because of that feminine side of me which I will continue to nourish and grow over the coming years.

So Lisa, I've found that glass slipper you seem to be still looking for and now you might understand why I had to wait a few days to send you in an answer to your question about when will I or when will Lisa finally find our glass slipper. I've been so very blessed to have found mine and I hope on day you can truly find your's as well!

Love ya girl friend and thanks for waiting and reminding me to send in my answer. I knew it was going to take quite a few words just to summarize things without covering every single possble detail regarding the full answer to your question. That would have taken a full novel to do!

XOXOXOXO Scarlett

" Is it an issue of not coming to an inner peace with who I am on the inside? "

BINGO - YOU need to accept YOU for who you are! I came to that realization (with the help of my counselor) about 4 years ago. Now I am fine and know Cyn is a big part of what makes me the person I am and I LIKE that person.
Cyn

Hi Lisa i really enjoyed reading your article. It very well written an easy understood. I am not sure when I stopped seeing the man in drag i hated that image, I think the image changed when i started accepting who i am. I only see a woman that needs to lose a few pounds and what ever excess weight needs to be shifted from waist to lower part. I need a whole lot of work that is for sure. but that is ok with me most woman feel the same way. My slipper is now right were i left it. In my closet along with all my other clothes. I think my closet is now 50 50 and male clothes slowly losing space. My wife is watching closely she does make a comment when things do not look good on me or something is not presentable. I guess she is waiting to see how far i will go. We really do no talk about it . Kinda strange. I am sure there will be discussions coming soon because i have decided to start HRT to help with mental health and stop hair line receding any more than it has. I still feel that euphoria most days. Some times i forget that every thing i have on is female clothing, No one seems to notice or has not said any thing. I do not dress as feminine as i would like but that day will come i am sure. What was a little different for me was i belonged to a private club for CDs and trans people. My wife knew about club and even attended some of the meetings and events. She enjoyed members and really took the time to understand. It was me that ended it. I went into denial I just hate my self, I could not handle it. I left the club and my glass slippers there for others to use. We could get dressed and store our clothing at the club if we chose. I got to experience going out once or twice a week with other members to night clubs and planned restaurants. They knew we were coming and every one made us feel welcome. We did spend a lot of money that did help, sorry for rambling. Acceptance of one.s self and support from your SO allows you to leave your slipper were you can find and wear it the next day.I think that is it. Luv Stephanie

Great article! I get an amazing euphoric thrill from dressing, but it’s in private. I know myself well enough that my hardwired genetics would freeze up Susie like ice with self-consciousness in public, or even around another person. What I get from it will always be best in private. Part of it is the fantasy is never questioned in private. There is nothing to contradict how I feel and what I see of myself when I’m dressed. But add a mirror and I deflate. I don’t live up to how I wish I looked. So – no mirrors when I dress. And no one to see me as I actually appear dressed, which doesn’t live up to what I want to look like. Having to talk in a girl voice, which I can’t pull off to my satisfaction, would shatter it as well.

Thanks Lisa Great article, for me when I look in the mirror with in drab or dressed I just seem to see the the women within, I have past the stage of seeing a man in drag or even a man anymore, and the strange thing about this is that I am still very much in the closet
thank you for your article I loved reading it
Hugs Paula

Hi Lisa
I wanted to offer some encouragement to you but,
your article connects with me on a deeper level.
I'll explain. I live in Japan.
This year, I joined my first musical theater production.
Guess what-it was 'Cinderella'. I auditioned for a female role but, I ended up being cast as a guy. At least I passed the audition. This was big stuff, we had a music director, a choreographer and a dance teacher. We were well into rehearsals. Then the virus happened. We continued rehearsals for a while. Then the decision came down. The production is postponed. We were told, booking a theater here is a yearlong process. As of now the production is for May 2021. I also perform with Tokyo Closet Ball-check us on youtube. But basically everything here is cancelled. If there is one thing I have learned and would recommend, it's this-however you perceive yourself, it's interacting with other people which defines who you are socially. You can stand in front of a mirror all day. It doesn't begin to compare to a guy giving you 'the look'-or more-in a club. It doesn't compare with a girls' night out. You can pay for technical lessons on how to present your feminine self. But the fact is, someone saying 'i'm okay with that' is not enough. You have to know how to deal with a drunk guy hitting on you. You have to know that, well it's a bad neighborhood and i'm alone. I'll walk until I can get a taxi. No, actually you won't. Girls don't do that. All those things shape your personality. I hope my comments are helpful, best of luck.

Great piece.
For me, the feeling never really goes away.
The painted toes, smooth legs (etc) , the public (and private) photos. And the thought of, “next time!”
Thoughts of what can happen while I’m out en femme are reoccurring day dreams!

Well written LIsa. I know what you mean about the afterglow or euphoria from endorphins . A lot of chemistry involved and not just psychological.