Welcome to Crossdresser Heaven, a safe and welcoming place for everyone in the crossdresser community.
Join Crossdresser Heaven today to participate in the forums.
For as long as I can remember, I have been fascinated with certain women's clothing. I think it really started in junior high school. A friend of mine would always dress in heels or boots, a tight-fitting leather jacket, sometimes leather pants or a skirt. I was already attracted to her, but I was always captivated by her attire. I always wondered what it would feel like to wear such clothes and boots.
I've had those feelings and curiosities for my entire life. There were times when I would think about buying myself a pair of boots that I could wear around the house and just enjoy without anyone knowing. However, I would quickly dismiss it and go on with whatever I was doing at the time. This happened several times over the last few years.
However, something changed within me after my mom passed away from cancer. I feel that as a method of coping with the loss, I finally acknowledged and embraced my feminine side. I actually went through with my original idea of buying a pair of boots to wear and enjoy at home. Once I put them on, it felt so natural and so right. I had very little trouble in adapting to walking in high heels. I still am working on wearing them for long periods, however, it's getting easier.
After purchasing my first pair of boots, I wanted more. I would buy more pairs of boots. I started looking at other things as well. I've bought several pairs of leggings, a skirt, several dresses, and a pair of leather pants. When I change into any of these, I feel more at home with myself than I ever have in the past. I love the feeling of a pair of hose on my legs and a nice dress to pair with whatever boots I choose to wear.
About a month ago, I came out as a crossdresser to a select few of my friends and both of my sisters. The support I have received from them has been incredible. I was also so happy that I could share my outfits with someone and talk about it with them. Additionally, a few weeks ago, I finally went out in public partially dressed. I met my sister and my niece for brunch and I wore my boots. I had my pants tucked into my boots and it felt great to be out in public. If anyone was staring at me weirdly, I didn't notice, nor did I care.
I have also been getting my nails done regularly now. I no longer care what people at work think of me. My friends at work compliment me on them and support me. Sometimes, some of the guys will make a comment which I will probably nonchalantly blow off or ignore, or they ask me about them and I tell them the truth: I have long nails because I want to have long nails.
I realized I would need a name for this new persona. I chose my first name when I first started dressing a few months ago. It was pretty easy to pick. I am a fan of pro wrestling and my current favorite wrestler's ring name is Charlotte. She is everything that I was attracted to as a man: Tall, blonde, blue eyes. So, that name seemed to fit with me. My last name, I chose as I was joining this community here at CDH. I thought for a while and chose the last name of a fictional character that also happened to be one of my lifelong heroes.
However, I am still so new to this so I have yet to complete my look. I do not have a wig, nor do I really know anything about the proper application of makeup yet. I have looked at YouTube videos and felt a bit overwhelmed. However, after further study of these instructional videos and some trial and error, I will eventually get there. That is one of the obstacles I hoped to overcome by joining CDH. I hope to get to know all of the ladies here. I hope this gives you all an insight into Charlotte Kirk and how I began my journey. I just wish I had begun it sooner as most of you who probably share the same wish!
- Did you have a particular girl in junior high school or high school who wore sexy clothing and boots who served as an inspiration for you to one day do the same?
- Have you perfected the art of makeup application yet? And if so, how did you do it?
- Do you wish you would have started full up cross dressing from top to bottom with the wigs, makeup, clothing, and footwear much earlier in life than you actually did? And at about what age would you have started your full up cross dressing if you could go back in time and start your full up cross dressing from top to bottom - makeup and all?
Thank you girls for taking the time to read my article. Now, if you have some time to spare, could you send in either a response to my article or to one or more of the questions I've posed to you above?
Sincerely, Charlotte
However, after further study of these instructional videos and some trial and error, I will eventually get there. That is one of the obstacles I hoped to overcome by joining CDH.
Having a goal to do better and the enthusiasm to reach it ensures that you can do it.
Lots of members can help you to resolve problems.
Hi Charlotte,
Great article. You are so lucky, Please enjoy your life and be safe!
Hugs,
K B
Thanks Karen. I do enjoy this side of myself. I just wish that I could enjoy it more often than I do.
Charlotte,
I loved reading your inspirational article this morning. Weather you know it or not, it is a huge success story. Having come out with your family and work place, your list 1 - 3 will be accomplished relatively easily over the next few months. I am sure the females in your family would love to give you a make over one weekend.
Then of course you have the resources of CDH & TGH only a click away!
I hope you favor us with another insperational article soon!
Huggs,
Samantha 🙂
Dear Charlotte,
Thank you for a lovely article. As for your questions, I will try an answer them honestly.
1. I knew I had a girl inside that really should have been me already five or six years old, so long before sexuality came into the picture. My role models were rather the timid and girly girls in class. I started to wear my mother's skirts and dresses in secret at twelve.
2. I do not think you ever master makeup, as there are steadily new things to learn. I never had a problem with basic makeup. Growing up with three younger sisters had learnt me everything about how to NOT do it. And after all alot of it is quite self explanatory. Later on I had a few lessons and a half day class at an evening study centre.
3. The simple answer is I would have started living full time as a girl as early as possible. Now the first time i was seriously thinking about it was for a school function at 16, but it would be another 33 years before Marianne stepped out in the open to claim her right to be.
Thank you such a wonderful article. It speaks to many of the thoughts I had accepting myself as a CD. Boots are definitely a major part of my outfits (which is why I love the fall so much)! I have always been fascinated by them and like you, it feels wonderful to wear a cute pair.
Hugs,
Natalie
I can't wait for fall and winter to get here. They are so short in Texas, so I will be wearing boots every for every possible second.
Charlotte you have the same taste as my own. I am a 24/ and drag queen. I don't own any guy clothing and haven't for years. I've been out since I was 17, I'm much older now with regrets of coming out as both gay and a cd/queen. You're reminded me of when I was young and first starting messing around with my sister's things at I thing around 9. My inspiration was my sister's and a couple of they're friends. I had 5 sister's and only a mother so I had allot of options when it came to shoes, boots, clothing, makeup and everything else I needed. My next up in age from me always wore the leather skirts, dresses, hotpants, boots, very high heels, jackets etc. I didn't know it at the time but I found out later her second income was from being a stripper so she had all the clothes shoes and boots to make her stand out. I became co-owner of those things I guess you could say. Later after I came out she free willingly gave me allot of her stuff. So good story and welcome to Cross Dresser Heaven. I think you will like it here. Jackie Wild.
Hi Charlotte.
Is your picture in the article you? If so, you NAILED it girl!!!
To answer your questions:
1) The girls that I went to high school with (early 70's) definately got me interested in girl's fashion with their mini skirts and boots.
2) Will ANY of us ever perfect our makeup and looks? The jury is out on that one.
3) I think I started my dressing at just the right age (early 20's).
Thanks, Joni. I wish the picture was me. But, that is how I wish to see myself dressed.
Dear Charlotte
Love your honesty about how you feel and finally decided to go to the public ....that take lot of courage and self esteem ,,,I wish I had this type of courage ,,,,wish you the best of luck to the beautiful lady you are
Hi Charlotte I love your Article You are so brave and so fortunate to have a very loving supportive family of sisters. I did have a junior high girl friend that was my inspiration. She was just so pretty with long wavy blond hair. I remember she would role her skirt up at the waist to expose those beautiful long legs I was so envious of her beauty. I still remember her today. I really did not get good at my make up until i joined a private club for trans and CDs.. The board members would invite make up sales woman like Mary Kay and others to our meetings to help us with application. I am sure it was well worth their effort. I did start cross dressing out in public at a very young age too young now that i think about it I was about sixteen and could pass for older when fully dressed. I borrowed the ID from a older sister of a friend of mine that i met at while out visiting a local gay night club. I learned at a very young age that the trans world is a world in itself. It can be exciting but can be very dangerous if you do not surround your self with the right people. I left that trans world when i was in my late teens after a tragic accident that took life of my dear friend. I do miss her even today. She was like so many here trying to figure out how best to express her self without intruding or upsetting others at the same time having fun as any young person should do while learning how to survive societies rules. Some times we forget that being a young trans person is a very difficult way to begin this wonderful gift of life.. Places like CDH and her members can help those figure it out with safety and support.It does not matter at what age you recognized that you gender identity needed to be addressed.It only matters that it can be done in a safe, supportive enviroment. Then it is up to us how best to express it full time all the time or some times in private. We all fall under the same umbrella. Thank you for your article Luv Stephanie
Thank you for posting this, Charlotte. It's a great article and hopefully I can follow your example.
Loved that article Charlotte awesome hugs
Hi there. I was a slow starter in crossdressing. I didn't really start until later in life. I really got going in it in my 60s. Yes that late. Now I'm going whole hog, so to speak! Top to bottom and I have invested in a lot of girl clothes. Way more than I have guy clothes. And I do love it. Makeup yes is a challenge but I am learning with the help of friends. It does take time and work but getting better. Also I take a lot of pix in my girl room of my outfits to see what works. It is always a work in progress but it is fun. Going out in public now with other girlfriends and it is great fun. Enjoy and keep moving forward.
