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We slowly become aware that it will come to the surface eventually. We know this now, right? Sometimes, we were aware in our earliest memories. Sometimes, in our adolescence or in early adulthood - those private thoughts and feelings that we push aside because we cannot process them or understand them. Besides, it will go away and we will go on our life’s journey - continuing to ignore this feeling. We know that if we were to acknowledge it in any way, it would confirm that the inner core of who you are is bad. This is how I interpreted it growing up in my time. The relentless thoughts and feelings that only lead to more guilt and a shame-based identity. We have come so far in the last couple of decades in acceptance of others, but we all know there is still a long way to go. It’s absolutely amazing to me now that we can get on YouTube or our computers and find all the information we want on makeup application, or every detail of how to present yourself as female - even voice training. It’s wonderful and I am so glad for the generations behind me.
So here is where I would ultimately love to see us go, but first, I want to tell you of a life-changing moment that happened when I was in my early twenties. By the time I had come home from the Navy in 1972, I had become aware that not only were there so many more people like us, but there was a way to actually transition to female. OMG! When I found that out my heart began pounding and I began sweating. I questioned myself: is this real? OMG, OMG! I want this! But at that time, once again, there was nowhere to go and no one to talk to. So, on with life and holding your secret inside. But then, one day I saw an article in a magazine with a few excellent pictures of a businessman carrying his briefcase across a busy intersection in a large city. They talked about him being such a young, successful businessman during the day, but in the evenings and on weekends he became this beautiful woman. The following couple pages showed his transformation. She was stunning! So that was it - that was when I knew I could live both lives. So going forward, for all of us, I could see a time where not only can we have this wonderful website and all that it does in so many ways, but also there will be so much more understanding and acceptance of trans people. Imagine if we could post pictures freely; this is who I am at my workplace, this is who I am as a father, this is who I am in my neighborhood and with friends, and this is what my hobbies are. And this is me as Rochelle. And it would be so commonplace, so ordinary and so accepted in society that we can go on about our lives. Maybe it’s a dream right now, but I think it could be a reality in the future.
Nice article Rochelle, it would be great if there was more acceptance, there has been a lot of progress. It’s so maddening when some are working hard to take steps backwards..
Hi Rochelle, thanks for sharing your article with us. You're so right, it was much different growing up back then and wondering if you were the only one who felt this way. I had a similar reaction to seeing my first transvestite (as we were called back then) when I saw Jim Bailey on The Ed Sullivan Show. What??? A man dressed as a woman, and being open and out about it??? Wow, maybe there was a way forward. And from that point on, even though I still wondered why I was this way, I knew now that I wasn't the only one who felt like this, which helped.
So yes, slowly things are changing and getting better for us. I really believe this.
My dream, too, Rochelle.
My dream, too, Rochelle.
While in an absolutely ideal world, I would live full time as a woman, the idea of being able to move seamlessly between the conventional/expected male (as needed) and the woman (as preferred) still represents a tremendous gain over the alternative of hiding, denial and repression.
While in an absolutely ideal world, I would live full time as a woman, the idea of being able to move seamlessly between the conventional/expected male (as needed) and the woman (as preferred) still represents a tremendous gain over the alternative of hiding, denial and repression.
Hi Rochelle, yes, we don't know what somewhere is wearing underneath, or the traumas they deal with. Yes we can move freely about more so than in the past, but some caution is needed. A supportive partner can help you, and you need to work with them too formulate a plan on ndressing, places visited etc.
A thoughtful article Rochelle. Best Wishes
Jane
Thank you Jane for your comments. I am fortunate having a supportive wife that we can and do talk about all the aspects of Crossdressing.
Thank you Jane for your comments. I am fortunate having a supportive wife that we can and do talk about all the aspects of Crossdressing.
Hi Rochelle, yes, we don't know what somewhere is wearing underneath, or the traumas they deal with. Yes we can move freely about more so than in the past, but some caution is needed. A supportive partner can help you, and you need to work with them too formulate a plan on ndressing, places visited etc.
A thoughtful article Rochelle. Best Wishes
Jane
Thanks Rochelle, Back in 72 I had absolutely no idea about what was going on. Thankfully things are better now but we still have a ways to go. Happy Pride Month, Marg
It’s quite an interesting journey isn’t it! Your bio is so interesting to me. Just another validation for us, the 2 percenters. So glad you have found acceptance and peace. And the bathing suit looks great on you!
It’s quite an interesting journey isn’t it! Your bio is so interesting to me. Just another validation for us, the 2 percenters. So glad you have found acceptance and peace. And the bathing suit looks great on you!
Thank you Rochelle for the kind comments. We certainly are part of a unique club!
Thank you Rochelle for the kind comments. We certainly are part of a unique club!
Thanks Rochelle, Back in 72 I had absolutely no idea about what was going on. Thankfully things are better now but we still have a ways to go. Happy Pride Month, Marg
Rochelle, thank you for your inciteful article.
I do hope that we are accepted for our true selves.. time will tell..
Rochelle, thank you for your inciteful article.
I do hope that we are accepted for our true selves.. time will tell..
Hi Rochelle
Well done on such a good article. I realised in about 1974 at 8 years old I had these thoughts about wearing dresses etc. I kept putting them to the back of my head wondering what was happening to me. Then some years later at 14 I finally caved in and tried on some female clothing. It was like the weight of the world came flooding out of me. Afterwards I felt awful thinking what is wrong with me. I’m sure you all know exactly what I felt and mean.
The biggest issue was not being able to have access to any information about this. Unlike now as we know you can obtain so much information about it.
Anyway, really enjoyed reading it and the various replies.
Steph x
Thank you Steph for the compliment on the article. Who new we would have to struggle an entire lifetime pushing it away and feel so bad inside. And I don’t know how many times I have gotten so angry with myself. It’s kinda funny, now I ask a different question; why do I feel so good when I simply put on a dress?
Thank you Steph for the compliment on the article. Who new we would have to struggle an entire lifetime pushing it away and feel so bad inside. And I don’t know how many times I have gotten so angry with myself. It’s kinda funny, now I ask a different question; why do I feel so good when I simply put on a dress?
Hi Rochelle
Well done on such a good article. I realised in about 1974 at 8 years old I had these thoughts about wearing dresses etc. I kept putting them to the back of my head wondering what was happening to me. Then some years later at 14 I finally caved in and tried on some female clothing. It was like the weight of the world came flooding out of me. Afterwards I felt awful thinking what is wrong with me. I’m sure you all know exactly what I felt and mean.
The biggest issue was not being able to have access to any information about this. Unlike now as we know you can obtain so much information about it.
Anyway, really enjoyed reading it and the various replies.
Steph x
