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Thank you for sharing Erica. Great story, inspirational and from the hearth. My take away is be true to yourself which will lead honest and meaningful conversations.
A beautifully written article Erika - and so relatable! I too experienced a post Keystone debriefing, but it was far more conversational and matter of fact than I ever could have imagined just two short years ago. She even stated that she may like to attend in the future, if only for the gala - whoda thunk it! Perhaps we both will have newbie attending wives next time!
@krisburton Thanks Kris. That is simply beautiful that she is even considering that. Will be nice to meet her. Mine on the othe hand will be happy to support me from a distance.
Thanks Erika, I will see if I can steer her that way. Any Podcasts you favor over others?
@sheryl321 the one my wife got good information from was the Fox and the Phoenix. Shame shame shame is a good epeisode that explain why we hide it. There are a few with SOs being interviewed. Which give good truthful information. Dont have to listen in order or anything like that.
Wow! This is such a good story. Thank you for sharing with us. I can relate to so much of what you've written. My wife is also accepting and supportive, but that doesn't mean it hasn't been a long journey with ebbs and flows. Trust has to be built and that takes time.
Im so happy you find it relatable. You bring up a good point with this being a long journey. I feel like I have been in this for so long and its actually only been just over two years. I am looking forward to the next steps. With an aim to build that trust.
Erika,
It is wonderful that you shared this experience. I had a similar series of conversations after returning from keystone last year, with a 'good enough' but not quite as touching conclusion. The exact ending notwithstanding, affirming-as you did- the pride I feel in who I am and that I hold for others, and the irreplaceability of the friends who I could not have come to know any other way, was what changed the direction of things and helped us get to a place we could both live with if not be perfectly content. Your article illustrates that the best way to stand up for yourself is not making it just about yourself, but about everyone.
Jill
@jrm3702 im so happy you find yourself in a place with your SO that you are both happy with. Not an easy place to get to.
I feel ya, girl.
Erika, sorry I didn't read your post before. It was very well written and I found it very moving. Thank you for telling your story. I am sure it helped everyone who read it.
@terrim No worries Terri. Thanks for the kind words. Im kind of blown away by reactions.
Erika,
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences. Your article touched me in many ways. I really appreciate your insight.
Jaiylyn
Great article Erika. As an accepting SO, I can relate to much of the thought process that your wife has. We love our hubby's and that over-rides all else, however, that doesn't mean everything is always easy and we don't still have our insecurities as well. We have talked about going to Keystone, since we live on the east coast and would be drive-able, however, it is somewhat cost prohibitive at this point. Maybe next year we will take a closer look, sounds fun!
@jb Nancy thank you so much for your reply. I am glad that you confirmed a lot of what I was experiencing. Definitely not an easy journey. Keystone is wonderful. Hope you two can make it.
I wish I could give you a SUPER LIKE. Such a positive story.
Cas
@loneleycd Cassie I will take it as a Super Like. Thanks appreciate that a lot.
What a great article erika! I'm so happy for you both and so proud of you! You're right this life is not the easiest thing in the world to navigate so anytime your on the same page as your s.o. I consider it a win!
@alexkokokline thanks for that Alex. Yes felt very much like a win and a big step forward. Hopefully our SOs will talk if not meet one day.
...Dearest Erika,
You are everything I wish I could be....a true hero....as for me, I am no longer married. I guess I'll say "happily divorced" and for other reasons than dressing. Though I have friends and family, they are unaware and I am unwilling to notify them. I do admire you and how you've handled your domestic situation especially after your latest 'retreat'.
Stay Well, Keep Safe, God Bless, and Continue to Enjoy what you love doing.
Sincerely and With Love,
Thea
PS...nothing like the ride home after an experience of you magnitude...Ya just didn't want it to end...
@theapat Thea you ae too kind. I thank you for your generous words. Know the happily divorced feeling too. No need to notify friends and family if its not going to make your life easier. The majority of my friends and famil will never know. And thats ok. Absolutely agree with the ride home. Well wishes to you and yours.
Erika, thank you for this article. I have had many conversations with my wife and I try to keep the lines of communication open.
@shadowqueen thanks for reading it. Yes im finding that is a very important part of the journey. And its seems to get easier the more its done.
Erika thank you for sharing your article it was truly amazing glad you and the wife worked or hopefully working things out that is hard spot to talk about and understand unfortunately mine wants nothing to do or hear of what I do so not sure where that will lead we shall see but truly thank you shine for sharing
@erinboo its a constant conversation and one which can lead to multiple conclusions. I so hope yours leads to happiness and contentment. And that is why I love CDH. Plenty of shoulders to cry on and help lift us up. Best wishes.
@erikabell I truly understand for me it’s been talks from why do you want to be a women are going to transform are you gay this is not normal then she calmed down and always it but takes no part in it I’m happy and content when able to this has been an amazing site for the short time I been here truly wish you and the so the best truly
Thank you for sharing your story, and the advice and encouragement. It must not have been easy to do this.
@catharineec its certainly not easy. But all the things truly worth doing are not easy. Thanks for reading it.
