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Thank you for sharing. indeed most of us are truly torn individuals. I too am. especially the part about "OK with my male life, yet wanting more"...
God, Alice you sound so much like me. I want so much to at least be en femme full time but at 75 I can’t really pass. And I can’t afford the surgery. My family is grown up and out of college and knows about my dressing. Though I not sure she realizes the extent I would like to go to.
I wish you success on your journey and please let us know how you get on!
Hugs
Leslie