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Many crossdressers choose to keep their thrilling feminine hobby or lifestyle a secret. Why? The LGBT community have their rights, and cross dressers are under the "transgender umbrella" so why are some of us afraid of admitting that we’re a cross dresser? It can be for different reasons. We choose to keep it secret because cross dressers are misunderstood people, or perhaps we have kept it secret for so long, that we have a feeling of “guilt” and are afraid to reveal that we cross dress to family and friends. In any case, if we decide to reveal that we cross dress to family and friends, it can be a great risk because if it goes bad, it can make your relationship with them worse instead of better. However, based upon my experience, there is a way to make it work. Here is my true story and advice…
My elderly father lives with me, and I’m his family caregiver. I kept being a cross dresser secret from my “Daddy” for over two years! This was not easy. I could only dress up as a woman and walk around freely in the comfort of my own home when he either went to town, or he went to sleep at night. How I finally decided to reveal “Revel” and that I’m a cross dresser was clever. There’s only one day (or night) of the year that you can dress up as anything you want, and not be judged - Halloween! So on Halloween night this year, I strongly felt it was “now or never” and I dressed up as sexy “Revel the Devil Girl” and made him close his eyes before I walked out in front of him. Then when I said out loud in my feminine voice “open your eyes for a surprise” he opened them and he was amazed! At first, he was a little shocked, but then he finally spoke and explained to me that I looked great! I thanked him, and gave him a big smile. Then he took a picture of me posing. When I felt comfortable enough, I explained to him that I’ve been cross dressing for quite some time - over two years since July 2018. He told me that he was “all for it” and was 100% supportive! I also modeled two more outfits for him as well. One was an orange dress, and the other was a shirt and a dark pink pleated skirt. My Daddy not only helped give me life, but he gave me the greatest gift of all…acceptance. So I gave him a kiss on his cheek and thanked him for being so kind. Halloween 2020 was the BEST Halloween I ever had! It will be a cherished memory forever!
We now have total respect for one another. He used to be a photographer at weddings. Now that he’s retired, he sometimes enjoys taking pictures of his daughter Revel (me) posing and modeling. Then after looking at the pictures together, we share some ideas back and forth. He taught me that "variety is the spice of life" and he once told me the best thing he likes about my place is Revel! Our bond is inseparable. This has made my life easier for me to be a cross dresser freely in the comfort of my own home. We have good clean fun together. I realize I’m in a distinct minority of crossdressers, but based upon my experience, it’s all about the right timing to make acceptance work.
So remember my cross dressing sisters, if you ever want to reveal to your family or friends that you’re a cross dresser, I strongly advise to wait until Halloween. It’s the safest time to dress up as a woman and not be judged. It may be worth the wait! I hope that you take my advice into consideration and if you decide to take the risk on Halloween, I wish you the best of luck! My Daddy and I both feel that crossdressers are very kind and beautiful people, and we hope that our true story is helpful to the cross dressing community. If you enjoyed my article, please leave a kind comment below or send me a private message. Or take the time to answer one or more of the questions I’ve posed to you below:
- Who was the first member of your immediate family did you disclose the fact you were a cross dresser and how did they react and what did they say?
- If it wasn’t a family member you first told about your thrill of cross dressing, who was it and were they accepting and supportive or just the opposite?
- How many of you cross dressers have a supportive wife or SO and what are their limits placed on your ability to cross dress, if any?
Thanks for taking the time to read my article girls!
Sincerely, Revel
Scarlett's edited version:
Revel, I couldn't wait. It was very informative and well written. You were quite creative to use Halloween as an opportunity. I'm sooo happy for you that your Daddy was so accepting! Now that you have revealed he is a photographer, I expect to see more photos in your profile, especially the one of you in your Halloween costume! By looking at the formatting of your article, I would expect Scarlett was your editor, yes? She's excellent! (To hedge my bet, if not her, the editing was excellent too). Now that you are an accomplished author, are planning future articles? Again, great job girlfriend! -Hugs, Marian xoxoxo
My first comment!
Thank you Marian for the kind comment about my article.
I prefer to keep my pictures private, but I will consider adding more photos in my profile. You are correct about Scarlett. She really is an excellent editor, and a wonderful sister! I will also consider writing another article in the future. Time will tell.
I'm glad that you enjoyed reading my article on Christmas Eve. Now that I think about it, my name "Revel" has the word "eve" in it!
Merry Christmas Eve, sisters! ♥️
Revel
My first comment!
Thank you Marian for the kind comment about my article.
I prefer to keep my pictures private, but I will consider adding more photos in my profile. You are correct about Scarlett. She really is an excellent editor, and a wonderful sister! I will also consider writing another article in the future. Time will tell.
I'm glad that you enjoyed reading my article on Christmas Eve. Now that I think about it, my name "Revel" has the word "eve" in it!
Merry Christmas Eve, sisters! ♥️
Revel
That was a good way to show yourself Revel. So far I have told 2 of my 4 brothers. With the covid as an excuse I let my hair grow out and in Sept. and had it colored to cover the gray. In Oct I went to one brothers house, when I got there I pulled a hood over my head and after we said hi I uncovered my hair and showed him my pierced ears. Then I told him the whole thing , that I CD. He was ok with it. I told him I couldn't stop him from telling everyone but he said he wouldn't tell anyone except maybe for his son. He would let me break the news myself.
A couple weeks later I told my 39 yo niece with the same reaction. Then in early Nov I told my 2nd brother only this time I dressed in fem. I wore black flats with ankle high nylons, distressed jeans with flowers embroidered on the pockets, a flowery top ( breast forms included ) and a little make up including lipstick. When I got there I pulled up my hooded sweatshirt and my covid mask and did pretty much the same thing. But first I opened this conversation by asking how he dealt with his son who came out as trans about 3 years ago. After he said she has to be who she is I took off my mask and the hood on my sweat shirt and asked him what he thought. He said that I have to do what I need to do. He then called upstairs and called his now daughter and we had a nice conversation for almost half an hour.
So now I have 2 brothers to go and I hope all goes as well as the others.
Sandy
Revel, thanks for such a great article!
I have gone through the gamut of guilt and shame of being what I am since I discovered my fondness for wearing women's clothes about age 12. I'm 67 now and just recently fully accepted my gender fluid nature as not being something to be ashamed of.
My wife has always known about my fondness for borrowing her bra's from time to time, I had my own panties for a long time, then one time she told me I should have my own bras too. Now I have about 5 times as many as she does!
No one else in my family knows, though I very much want to tell my adult children, but my wife doesn't want me to, so I keep it secret from them. All of our closest older generation folks have passed on now, and neither of us have any siblings, so there is not really any other family to tell.
The circle of people in the know outside of the family slowly widens, and I have not had an a bad reaction. I'm pretty sure my Mom would have been accepting, but I was still very closeted when she passed on, very suddenly in the early 90's. She had told me that she wished she could have had another child, but a daughter. She had often told me about the pretty dresses she would have made and bought for her daughter.
I now wish I could have introduced Amy to her. The other thing is I strongly suspect she would have had some idea for names and it would've been nice to select one of her choice.
This time of year always brings bittersweet feelings, as Dec 25 was my Mom's birthday.
My wife puts very little limits of my dressing, other than she doesn't want family or close friends to know. So, since our youngest is now living with us for a while again, my dressing is limited. Otherwise, like you and your Dad, this has brought us closer together, we shop for clothes together, in person and on line, and she says she enjoys the "fashion show" when I've got several new things!
Amy
Thank you Amy for commenting that my article was great. This meant a lot to me because great is better than good! Thank you for sharing your experience as well.
I'm glad to know that you no longer feel guilt or shame. Congratulations, girl! It's always a comforting thought that the one you live with accepts you, and that you have plenty of bras! Even with your wife putting limits on your dressing, it's nice to know that it has brought you closer together.
I have lived with my Daddy all my life, and dread the day when he will pass away. I'm sorry to hear about your Mother who passed away. Keep in mind that she did have a daughter (you being Amy) in a certain sense. I plan on revealing to my Mommy that she has a daughter named Revel.
All the best.
Revel
Thank you sister.
My Mother never spends Halloween with me anymore so I'm going to be very cautious about this. I plan on asking her how she feels about crossdressers BEFORE revealing anything. My Daddy will be present, and will explain to her how he's 100% supportive of me being a CD so in theory, she will have acceptance in her heart as well.
Yes! The cover photo of the Devil Girl is sexy and classy. When I dress up as a Devil Girl (my favorite costume) I look pretty sexy too! 🙂
Thank you sister.
My Mother never spends Halloween with me anymore so I'm going to be very cautious about this. I plan on asking her how she feels about crossdressers BEFORE revealing anything. My Daddy will be present, and will explain to her how he's 100% supportive of me being a CD so in theory, she will have acceptance in her heart as well.
Yes! The cover photo of the Devil Girl is sexy and classy. When I dress up as a Devil Girl (my favorite costume) I look pretty sexy too! 🙂
Thank you Amy for commenting that my article was great. This meant a lot to me because great is better than good! Thank you for sharing your experience as well.
I'm glad to know that you no longer feel guilt or shame. Congratulations, girl! It's always a comforting thought that the one you live with accepts you, and that you have plenty of bras! Even with your wife putting limits on your dressing, it's nice to know that it has brought you closer together.
I have lived with my Daddy all my life, and dread the day when he will pass away. I'm sorry to hear about your Mother who passed away. Keep in mind that she did have a daughter (you being Amy) in a certain sense. I plan on revealing to my Mommy that she has a daughter named Revel.
All the best.
Revel
Revel, thanks for such a great article!
I have gone through the gamut of guilt and shame of being what I am since I discovered my fondness for wearing women's clothes about age 12. I'm 67 now and just recently fully accepted my gender fluid nature as not being something to be ashamed of.
My wife has always known about my fondness for borrowing her bra's from time to time, I had my own panties for a long time, then one time she told me I should have my own bras too. Now I have about 5 times as many as she does!
No one else in my family knows, though I very much want to tell my adult children, but my wife doesn't want me to, so I keep it secret from them. All of our closest older generation folks have passed on now, and neither of us have any siblings, so there is not really any other family to tell.
The circle of people in the know outside of the family slowly widens, and I have not had an a bad reaction. I'm pretty sure my Mom would have been accepting, but I was still very closeted when she passed on, very suddenly in the early 90's. She had told me that she wished she could have had another child, but a daughter. She had often told me about the pretty dresses she would have made and bought for her daughter.
I now wish I could have introduced Amy to her. The other thing is I strongly suspect she would have had some idea for names and it would've been nice to select one of her choice.
This time of year always brings bittersweet feelings, as Dec 25 was my Mom's birthday.
My wife puts very little limits of my dressing, other than she doesn't want family or close friends to know. So, since our youngest is now living with us for a while again, my dressing is limited. Otherwise, like you and your Dad, this has brought us closer together, we shop for clothes together, in person and on line, and she says she enjoys the "fashion show" when I've got several new things!
Amy
An absolutely beautiful event! Every now & then, a girl finds acceptance with her father, & it is life changing! My time came early (I was a pre-teen). Both of my parents were very accepting. My paternal grandmother knew before I did!
She bought me the most beautiful dresses, did my hair & makeup, & took me out to lunch with her lady friends, who thought I was a darling little girl.
I wish all girls could have that kind of acceptance.
Revel, bless your daddy. He is a good man. 🙂
Thank you Bobbi for the kind comment and sharing your experience. Yes, it was life changing, and that's a really good way to put it! In fact, my Daddy and I get along even better now.
I'm glad to know that your family showed kindness and acceptance, and you and I both wish that all girls could have that kind of acceptance.
Yes, my Daddy is a good man. I read him your compliment, and he wanted me to thank you. 🙂
Revel
Thank you Bobbi for the kind comment and sharing your experience. Yes, it was life changing, and that's a really good way to put it! In fact, my Daddy and I get along even better now.
I'm glad to know that your family showed kindness and acceptance, and you and I both wish that all girls could have that kind of acceptance.
Yes, my Daddy is a good man. I read him your compliment, and he wanted me to thank you. 🙂
Revel
An absolutely beautiful event! Every now & then, a girl finds acceptance with her father, & it is life changing! My time came early (I was a pre-teen). Both of my parents were very accepting. My paternal grandmother knew before I did!
She bought me the most beautiful dresses, did my hair & makeup, & took me out to lunch with her lady friends, who thought I was a darling little girl.
I wish all girls could have that kind of acceptance.
Revel, bless your daddy. He is a good man. 🙂
Hello Revel,
I loved your story and my wife and I talked about me doing it this past Halloween as well. I didn’t go through with it but she was ok if I had made the decision to do so ! Now I may not have came out to my friends that night that I had been a crossdresser for years now but I think it could have been a start.
So to answer your other questions I’ve told my wife which was about 5 years ago now. Of course she had all the text book questions but after a few long talks she has been supportive and understanding for the most part. For me it was a chance I had to take telling her about my other side even though she had known about my love for pantyhose since we first starting dating.
Now since then I did come out to my oldest sister and again she accepted it with open arms and loves me just the same. Thanks again for your lovely story and I’m happy you and your father are enjoying life as one should want.
Thanks Ashley,
Thank you Ashley for the kind comment about my article being lovely. A lot of time and thought went into it, and it's nice to know that my sisters here at CDH are enjoying it. 🙂
It's always a comforting thought when your spouse or loved ones have acceptance in their heart. This is the key to make everything work smoothly. Now that your wife and oldest sister are so kind and supportive, you may have a fun Halloween next year!
All the best.
Revel
Thank you Ashley for the kind comment about my article being lovely. A lot of time and thought went into it, and it's nice to know that my sisters here at CDH are enjoying it. 🙂
It's always a comforting thought when your spouse or loved ones have acceptance in their heart. This is the key to make everything work smoothly. Now that your wife and oldest sister are so kind and supportive, you may have a fun Halloween next year!
All the best.
Revel
Hello Revel,
I loved your story and my wife and I talked about me doing it this past Halloween as well. I didn’t go through with it but she was ok if I had made the decision to do so ! Now I may not have came out to my friends that night that I had been a crossdresser for years now but I think it could have been a start.
So to answer your other questions I’ve told my wife which was about 5 years ago now. Of course she had all the text book questions but after a few long talks she has been supportive and understanding for the most part. For me it was a chance I had to take telling her about my other side even though she had known about my love for pantyhose since we first starting dating.
Now since then I did come out to my oldest sister and again she accepted it with open arms and loves me just the same. Thanks again for your lovely story and I’m happy you and your father are enjoying life as one should want.
Thanks Ashley,
You’ve certainly had a unique experience Rev, the stuff legends are made of! I’m sure glad it’s been a positive experience.
Thank you, girlfriend! Not only I had a positive experience with my Daddy, but here at Crossdresser Heaven as well. I'm so glad that I decided to join last month, and write this article to share with my sisters.
XOXO Rev
Thank you, girlfriend! Not only I had a positive experience with my Daddy, but here at Crossdresser Heaven as well. I'm so glad that I decided to join last month, and write this article to share with my sisters.
XOXO Rev
You’ve certainly had a unique experience Rev, the stuff legends are made of! I’m sure glad it’s been a positive experience.
Hi Rev, I really loved reading and hearing about your experience. It's so nice to hear of sisters who have had a positive experience sharing their passion with close friends and relatives. Thank you for writing this article.
I totally agree with you, K!
Being a crossdresser isn't easy when you have to keep your passion a secret, or worse, when getting caught. However, when family and friends accept your passion, it makes things much easier and better. It creates a positive feeling. I'm glad that you enjoyed my article. Thanks for the comment, girlfriend!
XOXO Rev
I totally agree with you, K!
Being a crossdresser isn't easy when you have to keep your passion a secret, or worse, when getting caught. However, when family and friends accept your passion, it makes things much easier and better. It creates a positive feeling. I'm glad that you enjoyed my article. Thanks for the comment, girlfriend!
XOXO Rev
Hi Rev, I really loved reading and hearing about your experience. It's so nice to hear of sisters who have had a positive experience sharing their passion with close friends and relatives. Thank you for writing this article.
Revel, you have a pure heart and such a kind soul. I'm proud to be one of your sisters.
Thank you for writing such a nice, inspiring piece and sharing your story!
..You are right, that is a clever 'reveal' Not exactly manipulating people, but shaping them to you will and yet, still getting the result you want all in a socially acceptable form! haha! Nice job! 😉
x
Thanks Kitty! Another kind comment from another sister in the UK!
I do my best and I'm touched by your kind words. Yes, it was clever in a socially acceptable form. UK girls are so articulate! I love it. 🙂
XOXO Revel
Thanks Kitty! Another kind comment from another sister in the UK!
I do my best and I'm touched by your kind words. Yes, it was clever in a socially acceptable form. UK girls are so articulate! I love it. 🙂
XOXO Revel
Revel, you have a pure heart and such a kind soul. I'm proud to be one of your sisters.
Thank you for writing such a nice, inspiring piece and sharing your story!
..You are right, that is a clever 'reveal' Not exactly manipulating people, but shaping them to you will and yet, still getting the result you want all in a socially acceptable form! haha! Nice job! 😉
x
