Welcome to Crossdresser Heaven, a safe and welcoming place for everyone in the crossdresser community.
Join Crossdresser Heaven today to participate in the forums.
One of my favorite words in the English language - Freedom!
This one word truly sums up my deepest core values all in two syllables.
One of my favorite questions was asked by Mr Shakespeare, a name you may be familiar with. The question is famous, To Be? Or not to be? When I heard this question I chose and choose To Be, even though I had no idea then, what exactly that meant, but it felt right. Nowadays it still has its challenges and still feels right, so I continue expand on that.
I have however, like many others, worn a yoke of shame and guilt around my neck for the most of my life. A yoke made of self-loathing beliefs and habits of thinking.
Beliefs like, something must be wrong with me because this way of decorating my body feels more natural and fun for me; I am so different from other people there must be a wire off on my hard drive someplace, and allowing this part of me to emerge and be seen, will certainly be the death of me.
None of these imagined ideas are truths, they are simply ideas repeated long enough, that hey, sort of crystallize into beliefs; believing they are true about us, but they are simply habitual ways of thinking. Judging it as good or bad, like we have the right and authority to judge anything accept our own choices.
I was having a conversation with a good friend not long ago, as he leaned against the big truck he drove, wearing greasy and dirt covered overalls smelling of diesel and old grease. This friend is a large, good ole redneck hard working Saskatchewan farmer, hands like dinner plates, and a heart of gold, an honorable and genuine good guy.
"Ya know Char", he said, "the only difference between your stuff and some other folks stuff, is that yours shows up on the outside, but I’ve lived here all my life and trust me, everybody’s got something going on, we just don’t see it as easy as we see yours".
The part of me that has emerged over the last couple of years, I have begun to truly embrace and support and making it visibly clear to others. Not so long ago I had only felt shame and guilt, even admitting this part of my spirit might exist. This belief above all other beliefs I held, was the most self-condemning and self-destructive belief of all.
This belief summed up in a single word, the complete opposite, and the essence of my deepest core desire and value was Freedom!
I had allowed this belief to hold me back from realizing many of my dreams. What habitual, self-disparaging belief do you subscribe to? Is it the one that immobilizes you at times? Then it’s time for a change my friend! We make changes to last, when we have had enough of the way things are currently being experienced; individually and collectively.
This week, notice it, that stinky belief. Accept that you are an eternal being, created as perfectly as every other living creature on the planet, including the planet, exactly as you are meant To Be. You are perfection exactly as you have been created, allowing the emergence of your Being, who says - no thank you to any self-limiting or self-judging thoughts, regardless of our opinion or idea.
No matter who you think are, it is only an opinion that makes it a good or not good quality, characteristic or anything.
It is one thing to review thought and action, then make some adjustments to increase performance of our body and increase the quality of our experience; it is entirely another to identify ‘self’ with these false ideas by forming ‘I Am’ judgments and beliefs.
This week, tune that inner ear in to the frequency of the question, what do I believe that keeps me from having my amazing life?
Identify it for what it is, an idea, an opinion, and chose to dismiss it in that moment. Deep breath - what I choose to believe is . . . (fill in the blank with your empowering new idea) . . . Repetition and commitment to practice is a real challenge and not always easy as our old belief fights for its survival. Continuous practice in supporting yourself To Be, will soon have this simple idea becoming the new belief, life will be forever changed in a positive and self-supporting way for each of us. My path to Freedom has been carefully thought through and imagined into becoming my life experience; I am so grateful for this adventure.
Thank you for reading Your Weekly Reset and thank you for being exactly who you are!
Namasté
Char
Char;
Thanks again for such an interesting and insightful article.
After hiding away for so long, I am on the same journey as you, perhaps not as far as you are, but on the same highway.
That is, I accept my rather dual, gender fluid, (here I go with labels, lol), nature, and don't fight it, so now I plan to enjoy this wonderful diversity that life has given me. Instead of hiding away, dressing when I can, or giving in when I can't fight any longer, then putting it all away in shame, I now embrace it!
Amy
Ah Char- as always you are right on point. As I wrote in https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/sometimes-she-screams-krista-pm-to-cyn-about-title/ , Like the mythical Tommy in the rock opera by the Who, the soft whisper is becoming a scream-“I’m free And freedom tastes of reality”! (I may need to write a media review article on that song).
Cyn
Ah Char- as always you are right on point. As I wrote in https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/sometimes-she-screams-krista-pm-to-cyn-about-title/ , Like the mythical Tommy in the rock opera by the Who, the soft whisper is becoming a scream-“I’m free And freedom tastes of reality”! (I may need to write a media review article on that song).
Cyn
Ahhh -Freedom--the trouble is Freedom takes Money--As someone who has accepted that I've lost some friends & family because of showing my fem side--I'm now fine with all that-The trouble is--I need to work so as to keep a roof over my head & with work I Have to be male & keep it secret from my Co-Workers-- Anti discrimination laws mean little to most workers--I would lose my job faster than you can say "Dress Up"--Lawsuits take time & money-- (mabe you win-mabe you don't) -- I guess I'll just keep buying a few lottery tickets every week-
Ahhh -Freedom--the trouble is Freedom takes Money--As someone who has accepted that I've lost some friends & family because of showing my fem side--I'm now fine with all that-The trouble is--I need to work so as to keep a roof over my head & with work I Have to be male & keep it secret from my Co-Workers-- Anti discrimination laws mean little to most workers--I would lose my job faster than you can say "Dress Up"--Lawsuits take time & money-- (mabe you win-mabe you don't) -- I guess I'll just keep buying a few lottery tickets every week-