Leeds First Friday, a Real World Adventure - Part Two

In this part, I’ll try to convey my thoughts and feelings, so the reader might vicariously enjoy even a little of what we did.  Again, it’s naturally written from my perspective but with help from my co-attendees and firm friends, Liz, Fiona (Fluff) and Ellie.

In Part 1 I described how Allie has gone from the unmanifest to the manifest.  But now it's only right that she gets some time for herself in the outside world. Sounds easy, doesn't it?  QED, a done deal, surely?  But not without a lot of self-doubt and nervousness as the big excursion approached.

Saturday 28th September: The nerves are beginning to make their presence known. I can feel them calling for attention but if I start listening now, I’ll cancel the whole thing by Monday!

Wednesday pm 2nd October: Despite my best efforts, I can no longer pretend this isn’t happening and am now experiencing some mild to noticeable terror.

Thursday 3rd October: The last chance to back out before getting on the train ...

Thursday afternoon: I made it! Booked in and got to my hotel room ... only to hear that Fiona, Ellie and Liz were in traffic and wouldn’t be here until 6:30pm. Hmmmmph.

Actually, now I'd arrived, there was no point in wasting precious Allie time so, after making a cup of tea, I took off my drab clothes, told them to relax until Saturday morning when they’d next be needed, and changed into one of the three dresses I’d brought.

I spent the next hour or so applying some makeup and tormenting myself with trying to fit and style one of the two wigs I had. I got a few messages from Ellie, updating me with their progress in driving from Norfolk, before there was a knock at the door and there she was – my co-attendees and informal support team had arrived!

A few hours later, after my companions had time to settle in and change, we decided to have dinner in the Thai restaurant next door to the hotel first. So, this was it, no backing out now, Allie was going public! We entered the restaurant and the girl at the desk welcomed us with “Hello, ladies, have you booked? No, not a problem, follow me!” We were shown to our table and seated. If there was even one eye batted, I didn’t notice. Everyone was really friendly and accepting.

After dinner we went up to a couple of the bars we’ll likely visit tomorrow, Fibre and The End, and ended up in The Bridge on the way back.  In Fibre there were a couple of young girls who treated us like long lost friends. This happened on the big night too, in each bar we were engaged in conversation by young girls. (Well, conversation is maybe a slight exaggeration, the music volume necessitated shouting in each other’ ears and still not hearing much of what was said!). I mentioned the conversations to Ellie and she confirmed my own thoughts that, as crossdressers, we are seen as not-threatening.

Not wanting to spoil ourselves for the Friday, we returned to our hotel at around 1am. The ice had been broken, I had been out fully en femme and the sky did not crash down on me. For those that have been out fully dressed, my feelings need no description. For the others who have yet to do it, I’ll simply throw some words down and you can create your own picture: Relieved, Validated, Faith in humanity restored, Absolutely ECSTATIC!!!

And so to Friday. We went down to breakfast, I was the only one of us wearing a dress and Fluff did mention this, asking if I felt self-conscious about it. “No, actually, this feels quite normal.” After breakfast, my friends were going into town for a little sight-seeing and shopping but I declined as I had not slept well so I’d try and grab another few hours as it was going to be a much later finish that night. I returned to my room and that’s when the enormity of what I’d done hit me, without warning! I’ve never, to my knowledge, had a panic attack but this is the best way I can think of to describe it. A hot shower and several cups of tea dispelled it fairly quickly though, and I was soon choosing my outfit for the evening.

We had booked a 'Makeup and Go' for each of us with the wonderful Tracey and her equally skillful partner, Toni, in a “room” she had rented for the purpose, her own studio being in Leicester. The room turned out to be a self-contained flat with kitchen/living room, bedroom and bathroom.  Everyone who has written about Tracey and Toni is right, they’re lovely people, and this made it more like a visit to friends, including cups of tea and coffee and a large vodka shot each! Liz and I were also treated to a complimentary styling of our hair. I was given a mirror to check Tracey’s work and was, for once, speechless. She had taken my 69 year old self and transformed me ... into a not-unattractive woman! After much chat and laughter, we bid our farewells, until later when we would see both of them again at The End bar, where Toni does a House DJ set.

We took our gorgeous selves into Bibi’s for pizza, where, once again, no eyes were batted or turned and we were, throughout, addressed as ladies. Once served with drinks, we raised our glasses to friends who couldn’t join us - this time. That’s what’s in the photo at the top of the article. Here also was the setting for another first for Allie, a visit to the Ladies toilet. Two girls at the mirror were chatting and having a laugh, but absolutely not at our expense.

Suitably sustained, we made our way to The End bar to catch Toni’s set. Although on the loud side for my super-hearing, the atmosphere was brilliant and the clientele included dozens of crossdressers and/or trans girls. As might be expected in a bar that was “jumping”, there were one or two accidental bumps, swiftly followed by profuse apologies, such was the politeness and camaraderie evident in every bar we visited.

When Toni’s set finished we headed back to the hotel for more comfortable footwear and a quick refresh. From the hotel we made our way to Fibre, the bar we had visited the previous night. It was much busier on the Friday of course but we had little trouble acquiring more beverages. I have to say, I was surprised at the size of the venues, I had expected big places but they were actually quite small, which made for more close-proximity encounters. One resulted in Liz being crashed into and sustaining some pain to her foot, again more profuse apologies. I remember saying to Fluff, “I’m sure there must be worse places to stand but I haven’t found any yet!”.   Thankfully, we found four seats at a high bench table and were able to take the weight off our feet. It was at this table that another accidental bump saw Fiona, Ellie and I enjoy a cooling splash of G&T on our knees and legs. More apologies, graciously accepted and no more thought of.

We eventually left Fibre to visit Smokestack (but no lightning), a self-proclaimed “Speakeasy bar”, playing sixties soul music, oh that sweet soul music. If we had come here first I would not have left. Aaahhhhhh, this was bliss! My heart rate dropped by 30 bpm. What a superb way to end the night!

Then, as suddenly as it began, my first public outing drew to a close just before 3am as we headed back to the hotel. The last thing I wanted to do was to take off the makeup that had really transformed me into Allie. I even had compliments from young girls, the last one being on our way back, “You’re really pretty”. I thanked the girl and laughed but I could have cried with happiness, that’s another first to chalk up.  Throughout our visit to Leeds First Friday, we met lovely people and we saw no trouble. Thank you LFF, we’ll definitely be coming back!