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Here’s a little story about my very first trip to a make-up store as a male.
I slowly walked past the store I wanted to enter. It was a high-end makeup store full of people, so I kept going to the food court and had a coffee and relaxed for a little bit hoping the place would be much less crowded on my next attempt to enter the shop. After finishing my coffee, I went back to the store. It was still full of people. Just because it’s a Saturday afternoon and the mall was packed full of shoppers, doesn’t mean the store I wanted to enter had to be busy! This time, I made a quick pass by the shop and turned around and headed back to the coffee shop for another coffee. Fortunately, I like coffee.
There I sat with coffee in hand again. Well not really in hand but rather in a paper cup. I was feeling sorry for myself for not having the backbone to go into the store, be it busy or not. I started thinking about what I could say to one of the salesgirls when old chicken little me finally got the balls up to enter the store. “Hi,” I could say to the salesperson. “I’m here to pick up some stuff for my wife.” Wrong. The salesgirl would see through that fabrication in an instant. So I thought, “Hi, I’m here to pick up some makeup for my girlfriend. Her birthday is coming up next week.” Double wrong. I’m sure they’ve heard that one at least a million times and I’d blow that cover story the instant they asked me what type and color makeup she wore. “I know,” I said to myself. “I’ll tell her the truth and hope she doesn't laugh me out of the store.” Ha-ha, like I’m going to say that. Yeah, like I’m going to tell here right from the get to that I’m a cross dresser and I’m in there to get some help purchasing makeup for myself! Then, in the middle of a brainstorm, the little idea light flashed on, and I had it. “My wife’s birthday is coming up,” which is not stretching that little fabrication too much, “and I would like to look around.” An oldy but a goody but still not sure if I was going to use that line either.
By this time, my coffee was cold, but I finished it anyway. Inspired by the power of my last thought, I got up and made my way to the store for the third and final time. Heaven forbid someone I know would be in that makeup store or see me entering the makeup store from the main hallway of the mall!
There I was, standing a few feet away from the store, looking in and seeing a crowd of people still in there. “It’s now or never,” I said to myself, adding, “You can do this,” so I finally got my courage up and just walked right in and immediately froze in my tracks.
Talk about a different environment! There had to be at least a gazillion different products on display. The store must have been extra warm as my face felt like it was on fire. I felt embarrassed to be in that store by myself without my wife. Especially while in there shopping for makeup for myself instead of makeup for my cross dressing self! I’d wager my face was so red that it would have made a firetruck look pale! Then the nightmare hit me. One of the salesgirls, early ’20s I would guess, walked right up to me and said, “Hi there I’m April, can I help you find something you’re looking for?” I am embarrassed to say I must have looked like the proverbial deer in headlights and was still a shade or two of red as I said absolutely nothing! After I started to breathe again, I realized that a vocal exchange of information was required at this point, so I replied in a shakingly timid voice, “Hi.” I’m sure a glass broke somewhere as I said that single word in such a high voice.
April, who was just as sweet as she could be started asking me a few questions, most of which I could not answer as this makeup stuff was all so new to me. I think she realized rather quickly who I was in the store shopping for. April had a warm, friendly smile on her face and said to follow her and let’s get started with some foundation makeup for you. Within a matter of minutes, she had me so relaxed that I was sitting up in one of their chairs as she was applying some samples of makeup to my face! People were passing by in the mall corridor right by the window and plenty of shoppers were still in the store. But by this point in time, I didn’t care. It was just full speed ahead with my makeup artist named April who really knew what she was talking about and doing!
Nobody paid the slightest bit of attention to a guy sitting in a chair having makeup applied! Absolutely nobody! It was just as if a girl was sitting in that chair having makeup applied!
And that is just the message I’m trying to drive home today in this article. Nobody cares in today’s world if a guy is in a makeup shop shopping for makeup! And if somebody does look at you funny or says something a little weird or inconsiderate, don’t be angry or embarrassed. Just be relaxed and comfortable in your own skin. We are living our lives to the fullest, while anyone that would comment negatively or rudely is living a sheltered and most likely dull life. Perhaps that’s the way they want to live. We want to be free and explore our feminine sides and feelings and be open to express ourselves freely these days!
So, when it comes time to starting your journey into the wide world of makeup, don’t be nervous or scared on your first visit to a makeup shop dressed as a male shopping for your own makeup. Walk right in like there like you own the place and enjoy the pampering you’re going to receive from the salesgirls. After today, I’m absolutely positive there are friendly, helpful, and extremely polite salespeople like April working in all these makeup stores who help cross dressers out on a more than regular basis. So just relax! Trust me, you’re not the first cross dresser they’ve helped find just the right makeup for you and you’re definitely not going to be the last as well!
There is one thing to remember. Have lots of money or a credit card or two if you’re going into a high-end makeup store as this one because you’re probably going to need it! I came out with a pre-makeup moisturizer, a foundation, and a filler for my lines and ended up spending over a hundred bucks!
Was it worth it? Absolutely. Was the product top quality? Yes. Will I go there again? You bet I will thanks to the way I was welcomed and treated by April!
So next time you’re about to enter a makeup store such as Sephora or Ulta dressed as a guy and shopping for makeup for yourself as a cross dresser, just walk right in like you own the joint and look forward to being attended to and pampered by the salesgirls in that store. And don’t be shy about telling them you’re a cross dresser! Those girls help several cross dressers each week. Some admit to being a cross dresser and some don’t. I suggest you go right ahead and tell them up front what the truth is about yourself and you’ll feel much more comfortable right after that very first sentence of truth! Trust me on this one!
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- Have you ever gone into a makeup store dressed as a guy looking for makeup for yourself and if so, how did you feel the very first time you did just that?
- How did the salesgirl treat you after you broke the news to her about you being a cross dresser and you were looking for help finding specific types of makeup you needed for yourself?
- Were you as anxious and worried as I was on your first time entering a makeup store dressed as a male looking for assistance for makeup advice and products for yourself as a cross dresser?
Thanks for taking the time to read my article and please take the time if you’d like to respond in any of my questions posed above!
Sincerely, Kendra Carter
My first experience also started off scary and ended wonderfully. I came in dressed but with only lipstick on. I has large glasses to help hide my face. I grabbed a map of the mall and held it up as I was walking. I had an appointment for a full make over. I may not have been shaking but it felt like it. I was sure people were staring at me.The openly gay representative at the store was just absolutely wonderful. I was handled with great care. When I I left, I was So happy ! (I smile everytime I think of him) As I walked out, I kept my head up and looked at passerby's as I left as I looked better than I could ever have hoped
Jenny
My experience very much mirrors yours. My first visit to a high end cosmetic store was just in for a few minutes then out, and was able to avoid all of the sale girls too! Then another time they were so friendly and helpful, that I booked a makeover, and it was wonderful, which I wrote up for CDH.
Lately I went into our local drugstore, which has an extensive line of cosmetics, and when I a 20 something sales woman asked if I needed help, I said I'm looking for foundation. She sat me on a chair and then tried a lot of different ones, till she got the right one. The thing I was most afraid of, was being out in full view, but many other customers walked by, and no one gave me a second look, even the ones that noticed me.
Thank you Kendra for a great article!
Amy
My experience very much mirrors yours. My first visit to a high end cosmetic store was just in for a few minutes then out, and was able to avoid all of the sale girls too! Then another time they were so friendly and helpful, that I booked a makeover, and it was wonderful, which I wrote up for CDH.
Lately I went into our local drugstore, which has an extensive line of cosmetics, and when I a 20 something sales woman asked if I needed help, I said I'm looking for foundation. She sat me on a chair and then tried a lot of different ones, till she got the right one. The thing I was most afraid of, was being out in full view, but many other customers walked by, and no one gave me a second look, even the ones that noticed me.
Thank you Kendra for a great article!
Amy
Hi Kendra. Great article and so appropriate. I found myself in your situation about a year ago. I went into Sephora and the salesgirl treated me so well I could hardly believe it. She did the same thing, sat me down and applied some foundation to find the right colour for me. I ended up buying the foundation and some lipsticks. It was a great experience and yes very nerve wracking at the time, but she made me feel comfortable. I confessed I was shopping for myself and she seemed to light up when I told her. I think a lot of the salesgirls really enjoy helping cross dressers out when they can.
Hi Kendra. Great article and so appropriate. I found myself in your situation about a year ago. I went into Sephora and the salesgirl treated me so well I could hardly believe it. She did the same thing, sat me down and applied some foundation to find the right colour for me. I ended up buying the foundation and some lipsticks. It was a great experience and yes very nerve wracking at the time, but she made me feel comfortable. I confessed I was shopping for myself and she seemed to light up when I told her. I think a lot of the salesgirls really enjoy helping cross dressers out when they can.
Such a positive story, Kendra!!!
It IS True that many (if not most ) Cosmetics stores do accept us more than they did in the past. Places like Ulta, Sephora, and MAC regularly cater to CD/TG Girls. It's good business, and literally a lifeline to old style Retailers.
Places like MAC often do public makeovers of male customers asa sales tool.. They will show potential customers a makeover of a guy, and end the session with the question to the crowd---"If we can make this guy look this good, Imagine what we can do for you!!"
It does take a lot of courage to do what you did, but now that you know, the fear is gone!! I'm proud oof you!!!
Dawnie!!
Such a positive story, Kendra!!!
It IS True that many (if not most ) Cosmetics stores do accept us more than they did in the past. Places like Ulta, Sephora, and MAC regularly cater to CD/TG Girls. It's good business, and literally a lifeline to old style Retailers.
Places like MAC often do public makeovers of male customers asa sales tool.. They will show potential customers a makeover of a guy, and end the session with the question to the crowd---"If we can make this guy look this good, Imagine what we can do for you!!"
It does take a lot of courage to do what you did, but now that you know, the fear is gone!! I'm proud oof you!!!
Dawnie!!
Hi Kendra,
I absolutely love your article. I have to say when I finally accepted myself as a crossdresser I made a conscience decision to own up to the fact I was shopping for myself. I shop in drab. Each time upon entering a store the SA will say can I help you. My first reaction is to say "I'm shopping for myself." I've found the more experienced SAs treat you like one of the girls. The lesser experienced SAs may seem a little surprised at first but are still respectful and helpful.
I had so much built up anxiety the first time I walked into a women's store I could hardly get the words out when the SA approached me. She must have figured out this was my first time and she made be feel right at home. After a few months, several trips and a lot of practice I'm becoming rather comfortable browsing the ladies department. In January I took my next big step and ventured into the high end makeup stores. While I was a little nervous, I owned up to it and was given the same professional treatment any GG would have received. I've been to several high end makeup stores since, always owning up to it, and had some wonderful conversations with the SAs. I'm looking forward to going back to one of them for a color match.
In my limited experience I have had nothing but positive experiences shopping in any of the women's departments. Two of my most recent experiences were highly motivating and extremely empowering.
Cheers,
Robin
Hi Kendra,
I absolutely love your article. I have to say when I finally accepted myself as a crossdresser I made a conscience decision to own up to the fact I was shopping for myself. I shop in drab. Each time upon entering a store the SA will say can I help you. My first reaction is to say "I'm shopping for myself." I've found the more experienced SAs treat you like one of the girls. The lesser experienced SAs may seem a little surprised at first but are still respectful and helpful.
I had so much built up anxiety the first time I walked into a women's store I could hardly get the words out when the SA approached me. She must have figured out this was my first time and she made be feel right at home. After a few months, several trips and a lot of practice I'm becoming rather comfortable browsing the ladies department. In January I took my next big step and ventured into the high end makeup stores. While I was a little nervous, I owned up to it and was given the same professional treatment any GG would have received. I've been to several high end makeup stores since, always owning up to it, and had some wonderful conversations with the SAs. I'm looking forward to going back to one of them for a color match.
In my limited experience I have had nothing but positive experiences shopping in any of the women's departments. Two of my most recent experiences were highly motivating and extremely empowering.
Cheers,
Robin
I"m planning to do a make over some time soon. Having bought make up in places like walgreens or walmart in M mode, there is one way to work past your nerves - you are a makeup artist buying supplies for your kit. Otherwise I prefer to buy cosmetics in G mode now, not that is should matter. I guess getting out in daytime in local public places is testiment to how far I've come in being relaxed at being me, which ever one I decide to be that day 🙂
I"m planning to do a make over some time soon. Having bought make up in places like walgreens or walmart in M mode, there is one way to work past your nerves - you are a makeup artist buying supplies for your kit. Otherwise I prefer to buy cosmetics in G mode now, not that is should matter. I guess getting out in daytime in local public places is testiment to how far I've come in being relaxed at being me, which ever one I decide to be that day 🙂
Hey Kendra. Thanks for sharing that. It will help others feel more confident, and realize they can do it also. I know exactly how you felt. But the nerves soon turn to happiness. And a Beautiful Girl walks out of the store!! Congrats on your make over. Hugs Pru
Hey Kendra. Thanks for sharing that. It will help others feel more confident, and realize they can do it also. I know exactly how you felt. But the nerves soon turn to happiness. And a Beautiful Girl walks out of the store!! Congrats on your make over. Hugs Pru
My first time in the makeup store for myself was only about 5 months ago, and was a little less scary than you described; but only because I had come from a bra fitting, where I had to say the words "I'm a crossdrresser and I need help" for the first time. This made it much less stressful to ask about makeovers and lessons. The result was an appointment for a makeover the following week, and when I entered the store (Ulta), it was also my debut as Bettylou, in full-femme dress. The SA was very friendly, helpful, and made me feel completely at ease. I think I was floating on air when I left. As a side benefit, I find I'm no longer nervous about shopping for women's clothes when in drab.
Bettylou