Notifications
Clear all

We Did It!

52 Posts
26 Users
150 Thanks
614 Views
Posts: 36
Baroness
Topic starter
(@trish54)
Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Joined: 3 years ago
wpf-cross-image

After much ado, Trish ventured out to the Jinx & De La Holiday Show recently. Thanks to the selfless efforts of my SO and the CDH community, the event proved to be an exhilarating success! I am indebted to you all. I still can’t believe we did it!

Trish Lamore is the soon-to-be 70-year-old CD who has only previously ventured out publicly in what she considers “controlled environments” (driving around town, walks in parks, small parties, etc.,), but never in a large crowded venue. This show, recommended by several CDH members, provided the perfect opportunity for this adventure. The venue is located about an hour away, the show is geared towards an LGBTQ audience, and an adjacent hotel eased many of the logistical burdens. My SO and I discussed the possibility of attending. It should be noted that last year there was a local drag show that was impacted by a significant “criminal attack” which some news outlets reported was in direct response to hosting the show. We agreed to attend, but to exercise caution. Tickets were purchased, reservations made, and planning was underway.

Trish posted, “Seeking Pearls of Wisdom From Those Who Have Preceded Me” on the CDH website to solicit advice from fellow members. The post resulted in a flood of useful information. The cardinal rule to note was; that if you have a supportive, engaged SO, solicit their advice and adhere to it.

My SO and I set about selecting the appropriate outfit. Trish tends to clothes that test the bounds of age appropriateness, while my SO is more conservative, promoting a “blend in” approach. This difference of opinion led to several amusing in-house fashion shows, and shopping trips, followed by more fashion shows. In retrospect, I think these preparations provided as much entertainment as Jinx & De La, and that was no small feat. Our plan was to pick four outfits that covered a range of possibilities, (warm/cold, wet/dry, etc.,) and then down-select as the event drew nearer. I must admit that at times I felt like the rebellious teenage daughter trying to push the boundaries of what is or isn’t permissible. In the end, my kneecaps barely saw the light of day in any of the outfits chosen.

Once we reduced the possible outfits to four, attention turned to accessories. It is important to note that my shoe inventory is rather limited. I wear a size 12 in men’s shoes and have had little luck purchasing women’s shoes made in men’s sizes. All but one pair of Trish’s shoes are stilettoes, and the one pair that wasn’t is a spool heel. A spool heel flairs at the bottom of the heel to provide a larger shoe-to-surface area, consequently greater stability. A possible option was in a pair of stilettoed ankle boots, which I planned to take as a backup. The four outfits were somewhat similar in color and cut, so jewelry and hairpiece selection seemed rather straightforward.

The hardest part of the preparation was packing the necessary makeup. Why is it that we accumulate so much of this stuff? I was intent on only bringing the absolute necessities. It amazed me how little of my makeup collection was needed.

Two days before the show, we had what we believed to be the most accurate weather info to select the outfit. We had a dry run, where I dressed using only the items I planned to pack. Just an aside, when you minimize your dressing options, you can get dressed a lot faster. All was set for the big day.

As recommended by the CDH community, we arrived early at the hotel. We familiarized ourselves with the route from the hotel to the theatre (about 50 steps door-to-door), did some Christmas shopping, and had an early dinner. Up to the room to get Trish! I have a wonderful makeup station at my house, but the hotel accommodations required some adjustments (lighting, counter space, etc.) on our part. Nothing major, but I think it was worth mentioning. Trish was ready in record time and out the door we went.

My SO had dressed like Rachel Maddow; short hairpiece, rimmed glasses, black blazer top and slacks, and ankle boots. I had a knee-length, black, keyhole, body-conforming dress with 4-inch heels. I pride myself on my planning and preparation skills. Still, that skill set deserted me momentarily as the elevator stopped, the doors began to open, and a tsunami of emotions rushed in. Remember; back straight, shoulders back, exude confidence, and above all, smile! The coast was clear. We cruised by the front desk exchanging pleasantries with the staff, and then out the door we went. The crowd was already gathering for the show. My SO loaned me a purse for the event. This was something I hadn’t considered in my preparations and only threw in an ID, credit card, and some cash. The venue had clearly paid attention to the events of the previous year and provided a significant security presence. Of course, I was selected for additional screening. The staff was very apologetic for the brief inconvenience, and we headed into the theatre. As expected, the crowd was LGBTQ-friendly, and I immediately felt a sense of comfort in the space. There was just enough time to get a couple of refreshments prior to the show. About this time it began to dawn on me just how tall a 6-foot 3-inch person in 4-inch heels actually was. I can’t recall ever having seen so many bald spots at one time! We headed down to our seats, which involved several ramps and stairs, all of which I traversed without incident. I overheard several comments about my mastery of the heels.

Intermission provided another opportunity to traverse the ramp and stair challenge, as well as mingle with the crowd. I received several compliments on my appearance. A couple of folks offered encouragement by way of lamenting that they hadn’t taken the opportunity to dress. I believe I was the subject of some unauthorized photos. I found this rather annoying. I’ve never met a camera I didn’t like. Just ask, and I’ll be happy to accommodate. The return trip to our seats was uneventful.

As for the show itself, we thoroughly enjoyed it! Our preparations proved successful as we had no wardrobe catastrophes or malfunctions. When the opportunity presents itself, we will definitely do it again.

In hopes of paying back to the CDH community, here are what I consider my lessons learned.

A supportive, engaged SO is your most valuable asset, use them. The light shed on a variety of topics by my SO made this adventure so much easier and far less stressful.

A 6-foot 3-inch CD in 4-inch heels, no matter how they are dressed, will prove to be obvious. In the future, I will reconsider my shoe purchase strategy.

Nothing will prepare you for the moment the elevator door opens for your grand entrance. As a fellow CDH member suggested; hold your head high, shoulders back, exude confidence, and smile.

Pack just what you need. This should help expedite your prep time and reduce unnecessary stress.

Doing a dry run proved invaluable as it uncovered a couple of minor things that needed to be addressed. We didn’t experience any wardrobe calamities!

Familiarize yourself with your surroundings. Scouting our route to the theatre evidenced some awkward hurdles, and we were able to reroute seamlessly.

I was totally unprepared for the emotional challenges of this adventure. I hope that as I grow more comfortable as Trish in a public setting I can keep those emotions in check and enjoy the occasion to the fullest.

Don’t leave your phone in the hotel room. We both minimized what we took with us and failed to coordinate phone duties. Alas we came, we conquered, we had fun, but no photos (the attached photo is of the outfit worn during our dry run). Guess we’ll have to do it again!

Reply
51 Replies
10 Replies
Duchess
(@jwhite)
Joined: 3 months ago

Reputable Member     Fort Collins, Colorado, United States of America
Posts: 127

@trish54 Trish what a wonderful story sharing your experience. It's wonderful to hear such a supporting SO. I'm looking forward to your next story and maybe sometime in the future I can share a similar story.

xxx

Jamie

Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

I can not say enough about the benefits of having a supportive, engaged SO. I consider myself extremely fortunate in that regard. We are looking into a future adventure, so stay tuned. In the meantime, consider planning your own experience. Thank you.

Reply
Duchess
(@jwhite)
Joined: 3 months ago

Reputable Member     Fort Collins, Colorado, United States of America
Posts: 127

@trish54 I'm taking it slowly as that looks like how my wife wants to move.

Reply
Lady
(@tiffany8)
Joined: 6 months ago

Reputable Member     Ontario, Canada
Posts: 106

@trish54 

Wow. Congratulations on taking that giant step. I'm so happy that you were able to do that. 

 

Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you, it was an unforgettable experience.

Reply
(@cdashley)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1254

@trish54 Wow, congratulations on such a huge accomplishment. I know what it did for me with just a night out in Toronto with a lovely group of ladies. Hopefully we all can do more of this.

Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you so much.

Reply
Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 12 months ago

Famed Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1945

@trish54 Some useful tips there, Trish!

I am glad that you had a good experience.

Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Glad we could be of some help. There were so many useful tips I learned from the experience. Now the challenge is to find another occasion to put them to use.

Reply
Duchess
(@flatlander48)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Cathedral City, California, United States of America
Posts: 1357

@trish54 

Interesting what you said about makeup. About 98% of my makeup items are from MAC. However, there are 3 levels of foundations the I use. Which one I use is based on based on how much time I have (the liquid one requires 2 passes) and where I am going (grocery store, a meeting or a social event). I didn’t start out with this in mind, but when I discovered how it turned out, it made sense.

Reply
Posts: 1053
(@jacquelinelarkspur)
Famed Member     Gateshead, Tyne and Wear, United Kingdom
Joined: 4 months ago

A wonderful account of what sounds like an amazing experience! And plenty of great advice, too. Thank you for sharing, Trish.

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

@jacquelinelarkspur 

Thank you, the CDH community was so supportive in this effort.  The advice and encouragement provided ensure a successful outing.  I am challenged to describe the degree to which I felt comfortable as Trish in a public setting with total strangers.  It was totally awesome!

Reply
Posts: 572
Ambassador
(@melodeescarlet)
Noble Member     Baltimore, Maryland, United States of America
Joined: 8 months ago

Good for you! It can be a very fun learning experience!

As for the heels - girl, wear'em says I. If you're gonna be tall no matter whatcha do, show everyone you're gonna be flippin' tall! Own that and no one can use it against you. 😉

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

@melodeescarlet 

Where were you when I needed you?  I think you are absolutely correct, stilettos it is!

Reply
Posts: 397
(@justnikki)
Honorable Member     Seattle, Washington, United States of America
Joined: 2 years ago

Fantastic! So happy for you, Trish! I love that thorough planning was the on ramp for your successful outing, and I hope that you can build on your success and be out in the world more often! I will never forget pulling the door open at a neighborhood event on my first public outing en femme; thrilling, terrifying, and ultimately affirming. Congratulations!

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

@justnikki 

Those brief moments in the elevator between when it stopped and the door opened seemed like an eternity.  Not having someone waiting on the other side allowed me to ease into my outing.  It just seemed as if the entire evening evolved at a comfortable pace.  

Reply
Posts: 673
Ambassador
(@lucyb112)
Noble Member     Staffordshire, United Kingdom
Joined: 2 years ago

Great article Trish and such good advice shared.

Glad you enjoyed it. I’m sure you can’t wait for the next opportunity 

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

@lucyb112 

Searching the event space websites now for similar upcoming shows!  Thank you

Reply
Posts: 47
Lady
(@emily2day)
Trusted Member     DFW, Texas, United States of America
Joined: 2 years ago

I love your story, I hope you enjoyed the show more than my wife and I did. it was a little to dark for our liking.

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

I must admit that I couldn’t remember much about the show, other than that we had several boisterous laughs. I was amazed with how much the troupe accomplished with so few people. Next time hopefully my emotions will be in check so I might be able to pay attention.
Glad you liked the story, thank you.

Reply
Posts: 120
Lady
(@chanel)
Reputable Member     New Jersey, United States of America
Joined: 4 months ago

Thank you for the great article and advice 😀

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Many thanks.

Reply
Posts: 2511
Hostess
(@ab123)
Famed Member     Surrey, United Kingdom
Joined: 4 years ago

A lovely piece Trish. Lots of experiences and advice. Thank you for sharing.

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

You’re quite welcome, glad you enjoyed it.

Reply
Posts: 401
Lady
(@krisburton)
Honorable Member     Northern, New Jersey, United States of America
Joined: 2 years ago

Nicely done Trish - and by your last line it shows you are aware of the wonderfully addictive nature of the out and about experience! You'll be fabricating reasons to go en femme grocery shopping in no time!

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

You have seen thru my sheer veneer. Actually, my SO came up with the idea once we realized we had no cell phone. Who am I to argue?

Reply
Posts: 201
Baroness Annual
(@conniech)
Reputable Member     Fairfax , Virginia, United States of America
Joined: 2 years ago

Trish, Trish, realized her wish!! Her hopes, plans, action! Aaaahhh, your so supportive signicant other. Lovely ! Thanks very much for making the time for a very enjoyable, valuable article 💐.

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment. My goal was to provide an encouraging, informative, humorous piece on a topic that is near and dear to us all. Enjoy!

Reply
Posts: 1271
Hostess
(@cdsue)
Noble Member     Delaware, United States of America
Joined: 4 years ago

.Trish -

Thank you for sharing your experience. It sounds like you had a wonderful evening and your SO sounds like a lovely lady being so supportive. I hope you have many more opportunities in the future. The advice you gave will be very useful for others that plan to do what you have done. 

XOXO
Suzanne

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you so much for the kind words. I am blessed to have both a supportive and engaged SO as well as the encouragement of the CDH community. Hopefully the article provides the impetus for others to get out.

Reply
Posts: 626
 Leah
Baroness
(@leah63)
Honorable Member     Minneapolis, Minnesota, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

awesome experience  glad it went well and you had your SO support.  thanks for sharing.

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.

Reply
Posts: 71
Lady
(@joanarbour)
Estimable Member     Missoula, Montana, United States of America
Joined: 8 years ago

I absolutely loved this story and I’m so happy that you and your SO had a great evening. I almost laughed out loud at the thought of you looking down on all those bald spots!

Reply
4 Replies
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you so much. I vacillated about keeping that part in for fear of offending some readers, but as you saw, I felt the cheap laugh was worth it. Glad you enjoyed the story.

Reply
Lady
(@joanarbour)
Joined: 8 years ago

Estimable Member     Missoula, Montana, United States of America
Posts: 71

@trish54 don’t worry about offending us baldies, as my wife says “they don’t put marble countertops in cheap kitchens”.

Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

I hope your wife doesn’t mind if I appropriate that line?

Reply
Lady
(@joanarbour)
Joined: 8 years ago

Estimable Member     Missoula, Montana, United States of America
Posts: 71

@trish54 there’s also another one about “a solar panel for a s.. machine”

Reply
Posts: 2
(@mexcd)
New Member     Seattle, Washington, United States of America
Joined: 5 months ago

What a wonderful story. Thanks for sharing. I recently went to an evening Art Walk dressed with my wife. I was confident and scared at the same time. By the end of the evening, I was so happy that "we did it." A few nights later, we did it again. Each time gets easier.

Missy

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

If we could only bottle the emotions one experiences during an outing we would be very wealthy. Thank you

Reply
Posts: 6
(@michellebec)
Active Member     DAYTONA BEACH, Florida, United States of America
Joined: 10 months ago

Trish, You did a wonderful job of planning and enjoying your trip. I wish that I could have done it when I was your age, but unfortunately, I'm slightly more that 15 years older than you. I'm a widower living full time as Michelle and really enjoying it.

Reply
1 Reply
Baroness
(@trish54)
Joined: 3 years ago

Trusted Member     Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 36

Thank you for the compliment, but you are an inspiration for us all. I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready for “full time”, but I guess I have 15 more years to decide. Enjoy!

Reply
Page 1 / 2
Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from Crossdresser Heaven.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Log in with your credentials

Forgot your details?