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I lived in London for a few years in my 20's, then in a much smaller city for a long time with a few breaks. In both cases, city life offers lots to entertain and distract you, and if you're lucky a few nice open spaces, maybe a picturesque river or seaside nearby.
For the last twenty years I've preferred to be in much quieter places, first by a Cornish beach, and now in a Welsh village / town – inland but next to a National Park. It's much more laid back, a lot less crowded, you're in the middle of nature, but there's just not a lot of choice for local entertainment
I don't mind visiting cities, they're good fun , but no way would I live there anymore,
But.I also see a downside to living in a small place if you're stealth cd'ing.
If you're not careful, everyone will know your 'business', The very thing I like about small places, is that most every one is friendly, even though it'll take forever not to be known as an 'incomer'. When they say hello, they mean it, and will know of you, even if they don't actually know you, It can be a double edged sword. I'm pretty sure my imprint on the village consciousness is 'oh that old hippie, a bit unconventional, but he seems to be harmless”, followed by “what's the crack about him?”. Curiousity and gossip are close neighbours
It seems to me the better place for ease of cross dressing is the big city, where people can be a lot more impersonal and curious about your life, but where there's a chance of finding at least a small support community of like minded people. (That community might even include people from outlying towns visiting as and when they can – oh, that might describe me!).
So there are pros and cons to both city and small town lives. But it's definitely the quieter life for me. Just my take on it, I'm sure there are others!
What's your take on where you live, or where you would prefer to live?
Thanks
Marti xxx
hi Lisa,
I knew I'd miss something! My apologies. Also to desert or outback lovers 😉
Marti xxx
EDIT
D'oh, and apologies to all of you jungle dwellers. Someone on the forum reminded me they'ld lived 3 years on the edge of a huge jungle, you know, that dozy user that can't remember past yesterday. Marti I think her name was [blush]
Hi Marti...
I have lived up and down England during my life...from Cornwall to Cumbria....mostly smaller towns, but usually within walking distance of some kind of countryside...or the sea.
I can't say I would not like to live in a big city, because I never have....but whenever I have visited, it's always been nice to get back home to peace and quiet....I hate the hustle and bustle...
Grace xx
I am definitely a small town girl stuck in the big city. Gotta get back to my roots!
Stevie
Hi Samantha,
Yes, the 'Bright Lights, Big City' effect. It's still nice when you get home to your own bed
Marti xxx
Love that phrase "back to my roots"
In London, at one point, I lived a short walk from Hyde Park. Lovely place, but not exactly countryside.
That's where it all started. 🙂
I do live in a big city suburb but I have a cottage that is on a lake and somewhat secluded. My wife is tolerant of my dressing but has lots of rules, especially when we are in the city. However, when we are at the cottage she is much more relaxed and give me lots of freedom to dress. I know it is because her fear of me getting caught are diminished. I love being up there, we are planning on moving up there soon and leaving the city behind.
I personally like living in a large town, I live in one on the outside of a Manchester, with a population of around 300,000. It'll take me 30 mins to cycle into the city or upto the quiet hills. Also has good shopping and entertainment.
Out of big city or small town though I'd go small. I hate the hustle and bustle of city's and everything cost a fortune.
Most would laugh when I say I was born, raised, and worked in a big city all of my life. Until 2019. My big city (actually the suburbs) is Memphis. 600+k. 1.5m metro area. Same population as a couple of blocks in NYC or London. Here I would be considered a citybilly. Liked living there enough for most of my life. The last 10 years, not so much.
Now I live in a small community right across the street from the Great Smoky Mtn NP. Literally. Maybe 400 on a good weekend, 100 most of the time. 20 or so through the winter. Now the area brought in 12,000,000 tourists last year (yes the COVID year). Most of them come in June, July, and October. The rest of the year is decent.
How does this work for CDing? Back home it was much easier. My work schedule gave me loads of time at home alone. But I didn't take advantage of that. Another story for another thread. Here its much harder. And like most small town situations, everybody wants to know everybody's business. And this super-conservative area is primed for a tar and feathering sinners.
All things considered, I love my new living situation. Never want to go back.
Gwyn
I grew up in a small city but moved due to work to Toronto. Can't get much bigger than that up here. I have been here thirty years and still hate it. I would love to move back to a small town. My wife is a city girl through and through and won't even think about moving out of the city. There are great advantages to being in a big city but I still would love the quieter life in the country or relaxing by a lake.
Holly😪
I am in a unique category as well. I grew up in New York City for almost 25 years. I then moved to suburbia in New Jersey for 15 years til we needed a larger home. I moved only about 2 miles away, so I would say I am still in suburbia, but I live in a very rural part of town, but I'm still only 1/4 mile to a more suburban region.
I'm about an hour away from midtown New York and about 90 minutes from Philadelphia. But it's not a small town where everybody knows everyone else. There is still a lot of the New York impersonal behavior. Much of the northeastern part of New Jersey is more of a megalopolis, with one town jutting right up to the next town, so it has a small town feel with quiet. Although traffic on the highways can get busy at times, it's nothing like the hustle and bustle of New York, "the city that never sleeps." Yet there are also a lot of parks close by, but not all have good terrain for walking in a skirt.
Things are impersonal enough that I have been taking regular walks through my neighborhood en femme and although I see many of the same people, and some wave or say hi, none of them know the male me. Since the mask wearing from the pandemic, I have even gone out grocery shopping en femme. Even though I know people in the community, dressed as a girl and wearing a feminine mask I don't think I would be recognized.
Until I went to a transformation place near my home, I was quite unaware of the number of people who crossdress and live relatively close to me (without having to go into New York City). And I also found out how many places are LGBTQ supporting. For example I went into a woman's clothing store en femme a couple of times where the sales associate knew the male me, she recognized me and said "Oh, hi" before going back to what she was doing. I've been out to restaurants with other crossdressers who don't even try to change their voice, and the waiter doesn't even bat an eye.
Sure, there are fewer things to do than in the big cities, but I'm close enough if I want to go (and I have gone a few times en femme to see Broadway shows), But there are enough things closer at hand if I want to go out without visiting the city. Not that I have a lot of opportunity or desire because of other responsibilities, but they are there. And after spending the last 40 years out in suburbia, I wouldn't want to go back to big city life.
Hi Gwyn,
Thanks. Just did an image search of the Great Smokeys - beautiful.
Marti xxx
Hi,
One of my friends hails from there. He's taught me to pronounce it "torron'o" and then said I still hadn't got it!
Marti xxx
