A theory on why we dress the way we do

Hi Leah!

Good topic!

I can certainly agree with your theory...at least in part.  True in that there are multiple reasons that encompass our desire to dress.

As far as what we pick out and go for when it comes to dresses, shoes, outfits, etc. I totally agree with you.

Being in the US all my life, I've watched women slowly turn into this drab unisex look that a lot of times is very un-flattering.

So yes, when I dress, its clothes and outfits that " I " feel are attractive and sexy and in some ways reflect back on a time when women weren't "afraid?" to look like the beautiful woman they could be.

XO Robyn 🤗❤️

Hi Leah, interesting thought process. For me it actually feels right or normal for me to wear women’s clothing. I feel at peace. I don’t have a picture of the perfect female in my head. Thank you for posting

Hi Leah,

I think you have one answer as to why we Dress, just not the answer. Like the story about the blind men describing an elephant after touching a part of it. And if Dressing makes you happy, the reason really doesn't matter.
My answer d(I think) is that I was only comfortable in female social groups, and I had/have a desire to be part of them; so I "become" female. When Dressed, I feel "normal" and happy. There are surely many other "right" answers to that question.

Hugs,
Bettylou

Hello Leah,

Thanks for the question, I too have thought of this as a motivating factor. Part of what inspires my preferred look is my attraction to their femininity .  Like you my wife isn't too girly, at least on a regular basis in the makeup, heels, and dresses department.  For me, at least, I don't think it's a main factor to kind of replace something, although I can see that side of it, more so it's in the back of my mind when I'm choosing clothes shoes etc.

It's interesting because my tastes in women's cloths have changed with the fashions over the years.  It's always changed to reflect my age or peer group at any given moment.  In high school i wanted to try the styles the girls were wearing, same in college, and so on. Now as i'm in my early 40's my style is more age appropriate to my peer group.  In particular something that you might see in an office setting or something other women in their 40's might wear to a nice night out.  When I see an outfit that catches my attention on someone, my thought process usually goes something like Holy cow she is hot, to I love that dress or shoes or skirt or whatever, followed by, what kind of necklace or earrings is she wearing with that, to, I want to try that, lol.  I will say that on the occasions my wife does get dressed up, say for a wedding or something, she has my full attention and not on a crossdressing level if you know what i mean, lol.  Sorry I kind of veered off the tracks, but my point is that, for me at least, I want to experience the femininity I'm attracted to in women. By the time i'm done it usually ends up being femininity times 100 in the lengths I go to achieve it .  It really doesn't matter if my wife dresses in that way or not. For me, it doesn't make my desire to dress more or less. Thanks again for the question

p.s.

When we met she was a sorority girl and if anyone is familiar with that scene, she always was wearing hose and heels and dresses for various ceremonies and whatnot. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss those days a bit, lol.

I think seriously, that BettyLou has the rights of it. Personally, I have always desired the company of women and have had little motivation to share the company of men despite the sports and work collegial stuff. Sure I hasve had male friends but without exception these men have had something else about them that set them apart from the others.
My mother was an elegant and well dressed woman with 1950s manners and etiquette which, as a youngster, I adored. My grandmother, on the other hand, was a no nonsense Scottish highlander! I loved them both dearly and in doing so recognised that women have more worth than all the men in the world combined can muster!
My wife is alway beautifully dressed and well groomed but behind that facade is an extremely talented person with an uncanny knack of cutting to the quick with a single, well-expressed sentence.
This is beside the point but I try to set a stage...
Why do I dress 'en femme'? Why have I attempted to enter a world as exclusive as the Closed Bretheren? Simply that as a result of a serious head injury all that made the man that was had become redundant. Worse, all the things that made up 'Me' had become irrelevant due to the difficulties of rebuilding those pesky neural pathways. So, my feminine anima surfaced and it all made sense! My wife, while hesitant at first, has plunged headlong into making my emotional transition into a woman more complete. Now I don't feel complete without my female appearance... Polly has indeed replaced my old drab self.
I say that with a touch of regret as the 'old drab self' was a great person as a human being! Full of life, compassion, sense of community... as well as all of the cool things I have done throughout life. Now is a time to close the circle... who can say they were born a man and died a woman? that is my desire... my mission!

Love to you all xxx unashamedly, Polly

Hi Leah

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

I’m sure this may be true in a lot of cases, that some try to emulate their ideal woman.

I guess if we look in the mirror and see our ideal woman then what you say is true in a sense. I like to turn your hypothesis on it’s head. Do we find women attractive who reflect OUR tastes. We all develop different tastes/styles, very individual, and yes these may be influenced by those we see around us. Since I have let this part of me flourish I am finding what makes ME happy. I may love the look of a leopard print maxi skirt on somebody and think it would look good on me, but don’t think I am necessarily trying to emulate the wearer. Just trying to be my best me! Just wearing what makes me happy and feel good inside that I am reflecting my fabulous fashion sense🤣🤣🤣  only kidding.

Hope this makes sense!

❤️Bianca

Perhaps the Clothed Brethren? 🤔

Wow, Ms. Polly, that is quite an experience to share! Thank you for that  ❤️

Ohh, I get the joke even if it took me an age! Well done... the ‘Clothed Brethren’ love it!

Very interesting post for sure, and not sure where you live, but here in FL female sexiness is all around us. Skimpy, low-cut tops, leggings (whoever invented those deserves a huge prize❤️), short shorts, and every FL woman has a collection of sandals and flips that show off those pretty feet and painted toenails. But, what is the purpose of my behavior, by which I assume you mean crossdressing? While I’m sure it’s different reasons for some, I’m almost certain that many of us dress for sexual reasons (admit it, or don’t), whether it manifests itself mentally or physically. For me, how Haley dresses has nothing to do with whether or not my wife dresses like a “hot wife” in tight, revealing clothing, and more to do with the purpose. Am I just looking to relax for a while, take a deep breath and look in the mirror and admire the girl looking back at me (who, by the way, can remind me of my mother)? Or, am I dressing slutty for a “breakfast” date with my manfriend? 90% of my dressing revolves around sexual fantasy, and the realization and acceptance of who Haley is attracted to has empowered me to try and understand how fem looks and feels. For some, it may be dressed to kill, for others a pair of panties is all it takes to feel fem and pretty. But since you asked, it’s all about the sex for this girl...Haley likes to have a good time, and loves to submit herself to the desires of others. That probably makes me a bad girl...wait, that definitely makes me a bad girl😉

Haley😘

I 'dress' to be pretty. At that point it gets complicated.

Araminta.

Hi Leah, Obviously there are many different reasons why we dress the way we do.  While I can speculate, as you have, I can only speak about my reasons.  It has taken me a long time to figure it out.  It may sound like a cliché, but it started in my childhood.  My Mom, who was the biggest influence in my life, always wanted a daughter.  And my Dad, wanted a "manly" son.  Though I went through some phases of trying to please Dad by doing "manly" sports, Mom eventually won.  Mom told me that during her pregnancy she was positive I would be born as a girl.  And that I should have been.  So somewhere in the womb, I already had it imprinted on me that I should be a girl.  Oops out popped me as a male.  I don't regret it - it made it possible for me to have a very successful career but I do wish I figured this out a lot longer ago and started down this journey earlier.  Mom is the one who gave me my femme name Krista.  As soon as she told me the name, I fell in love with it.  I definitely could see me being Krista at a young age.  Anyway, now I'm retired, my SO knows about me being a CD, and I'm dressing pretty much every day, most of the day (not quite 24/7 but darn close).  So it has nothing to do with aesthetics, sex or any of that stuff for me.  It is just what has evolved; a natural process that started in the womb culminating now in my sixties.  Thanks for introducing this thought provoking topic.  Stay safe, stay healthy, All the Best, Hugs, Krista.

Hi Leah good theory my reasons are I have certain era's of women stuck in my mind, the women of  the 1950's & 1970's. My mother and all my aunties dressed like women of the 50's all through life, I personally loved the 70's and have this all stuck  in my head. So when Sarah is out this is what she resembles and loves it.

Best Wishes

Sarah