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Acceptance and personal POV

19 Posts
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Posts: 1310
Duchess
Topic starter
(@augustvaliant)
Noble Member     Long Island, New York, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Hi everyone !

I just wanted to post a little something that I hope is a little thought provoking and maybe helps lead to some self reflection. This is off the cuff so forgive me if I meander a bit.

Our individual points of view, POV are very dear to us but can differ greatly from person to person. For example, (I believe) it is common for a CD or a TG to enjoy wearing a bra. That POV is very different from my (GG) wife's POV on bras. She will tell you how frustrated she is shopping for them and how she can't freaking wait to take the damn things off at the end of the day, and sooner if possible. That doesn't mean she doesn't have/hasn't had bras that she has liked because they were well fitting and pretty. While I would see wearing a bra as a luxury.... She sees wearing a bra as a necessity and a maybe even a nuisance at times. It seems no wonder that a GG SO can be bewildered when they find out....... Let me know in the comments of you did/didn't experience this when she found out.....

Taking this further.....

I have seen CD/TG women criticize other CD/TG women for posting some things. Like how many panties they own or what type of panty is their favorite. Now here is where I need to tread carefully. Please understand I am NOT trying to call anyone out or accuse anyone of bad behavior. I'm trying to emphasize acceptance.

I am never going to be able to walk a mile or more in some peoples shoes. I will never be able to experience what some others have experienced. I can only Imagine some things and I am sure my imagination is capable of falling short in many instances.

Moving on.

I can understand that if you are a woman born in a male body you might feel that a CD boasting about their panty collection cheapens/detracts from your journey and the acceptance of others like yourself. Am I wrong here ? I don't believe I am because I have seen comments and perhaps received a couple myself.
I'm not complaining about those comments. I'm trying to say I understand those comments and accept them.

Here's the thing. Every individual has what they feel is important to them. A CD might feel that a large collection of Glittery pink Latex open crotch G-Strings is the most important thing in the world to them and their identity/femininity. And please DON'T think this is a CD vs TG thing. It is only an example. As a CD I have encountered others here who have interests that I don't exactly embrace. CD or TG is irrelevant. But even if I don't care for their collection of glittery latex open crotch g-strings...... I don't put them down for it. I don't shut them out. I say "good for you if it makes you happy, makes you feel whole, makes you feel feminine, makes you feel more complete than if you didn't have them."

Let us never forget we're in this together.

I get a little upset with some things. Like when members of the greatest place on earth fight with each other. No one is better than anyone else. We all need each other. We all have our own individual point of view and things that we find important. I don't have to walk in your heels to appreciate your journey. I may never fully understand your journey. I will always lend an ear if you need it. Not everyone will do what you do or feel the way you do. If everyone was capable of what everyone else could do, we wouldn't have any world record holders or a Guiness book of world records if you get my meaning.

I think only a few will know what precipitated this post. If you don't know please don't ask me. I'm not trying to incite controversy. I'm actually hoping to diffuse a situation. I hope I have not failed.

Our journeys may be different, but let's not fight, let's take these journeys together

Hugs
Happy Holidays !

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18 Replies
Posts: 446
Lady
(@bren58)
Honorable Member     Apache Junction, Arizona, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Thank you Autumn for you have hit the nail right on the head and I could have not said it better!!

All of us with our differences are a group of people with similiar "interests", and if we act in a negative manner because we don't relate to someone else's experiences, we are tearing apart the fabric that makes this place what it is.

I am very guilty of not being able to relate to many comments made here. I don't see x-dressing in the same light as many of you do. I don't get excited wearing bras or breast forms, although I do own several pair, they became a nuisance to me. But I always congratulate someone who has purchased their first/new pair because it excites them, on their journey.

It's time to move on and forgive and forget what happened and be big, grown up girls. Lick our wounds, learn a lesson and move forward as a group.

I am here right now because I am selfish, if I help someone, anyone here on this site, if I say just one thing that rings a bell in someone's mind. Then I help myself and it was all worth it. I no longer feel I have a problem with x-dressing, I have moved on to another phase in my journey. I dress as a female because I feel that I am female, (with a slight temporary problem), but maybe I can support someone else on their journey and that gives me strength to move forward with mine.

Love Everyone!!
And remember, Girls Rule!!
Breanna

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Posts: 1700
Hostess
(@pattygurlcd)
Noble Member     Louisville, Kentucky, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Hi Autumn,

I know what your saying,

We all have interests involving our crossdressing that make us unique individuals.

But heck that makes us interesting.

As miss Tiffany pointed out to me a while back when I needed you girls.

This is a support group and we need to try to understand and see another persons point of view.

And if we can't,we need to handle it in a loving caring manner if at all possible.

Thanks autumn

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Posts: 0
Guest
(@Anonymous)
New Member
Joined: 1 second ago

I don't know or want to know what happened but isn't individualism what makes us human. No two people are exactly alike, we may have a similar outlook but there will be differences in opinion. I have a friend on face book and he's rather opinionated which is why I like him but he does post a few things I don't agree with. Sometimes I will offer a rhetorical comment which he enjoys and sometimes you see I've got this little wheel in my mouse and I just give it a spin and scroll right on by. My friend actually posted a sign up once that said, just because we disagree, doesn't mean I don't like you. Now, please what ever the disagreement was about lets put it behind us and move on. Besides it's the wrong time of year for that, Peace on earth and goodwill to all right.

Merry Christmas to you all, may your homes and hearts be filled with love and joy not just on Christmas day but everyday.

Love Heather.

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Posts: 196
 Dana
Lady
(@sabrinacan)
Reputable Member     Long Beach, California, United States of America
Joined: 7 years ago

Guess what? I have no idea what the hub bub is all about. In my case ignorance is bliss. I'm just a happy girl who stays in her lane. We all talk about our journey and many of us are on that road. Let's keep it simple stay in our own lanes, use your blinkers when merging and let's get to our destination safely.

We are sisters here stay positive my femme friends.

💋❤️💋❤️💋

Dana

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Posts: 0
Guest
(@Anonymous)
New Member
Joined: 1 second ago

Hi Autumn,

and thank you for posting something which needs to be said

Bras, or their content, are hallmarks of femininity; I glory in mine, but to my wife, they are a nuisance. I think of all of the members here as sisters - a family of sorts - and it dismays me to see "problems" arise. We all have our own lifestyles, and we are here for mutual support, not judgement of those lifestyles. This allows us to remain sisters, and friends.

Merry Christmas to all of my sisters and friends here on CDH!
Bettylou

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Posts: 1700
Hostess
(@pattygurlcd)
Noble Member     Louisville, Kentucky, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Merry Christmas Betty Lou.

Thank you for adding your kindness and wisdom to a wonderful year.

Patty

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Posts: 224
Lady
(@stevie65)
Reputable Member     Vegreville, Alberta, Canada
Joined: 5 years ago

Well to criticize others for what they wear or do or have is being a hyprocryte period. We all started doing the same thing CROSSDRESS. We all have some sort of goal to reach some further and others not so. But to berate some one who is doing and has started doing the same thing they have is pure outright ignorants and shows they have no self respect or any respect for others and therefore should be removed from the group.

Every persons POV is different and will be different to a point. It is for everyone to have that openess and accepting of every ones progress in this different changing society we all live in and to support and help when and if we can and need be.

Just remember this we all started in the same boat trying on Girls clothes... We all want to wear makeup and do other things. It is better to not judge unless you are perfect... and I doubt very much any one is even close to that so stay on the same wagon stop trying to jump around and tip it... be the solution not the problem.

From Alberta Canada to all

Merry Christmas

Stevie

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Posts: 805
Duchess
(@camryn)
Prominent Member     Louisiana, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Since joining CDH, most of what I’ve seen is one big, diverse, happy family!! Even the best of families have squabbles. And I’ve always thought CDH is the “greatest place on earth” – for CDs, TGs, up and down the spectrum!

Oh, and I LOVE bras (and forms) and hope this is not offensive to anyone here.

Merry Christmas to all!!

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Posts: 446
Lady
(@bren58)
Honorable Member     Apache Junction, Arizona, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

At the end of the day, We are all just people, male or female, trying to survive this thing called life.

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Posts: 0
Guest
(@Anonymous)
New Member
Joined: 1 second ago

Autumn

You expressed some very important words and sentiments which have been very well supplemented by others so I will not try to improve on the eloquence but do want to reinforce the sentiment. Whilst we all have a common theme of Crossdressing we are all at different points in the spectrum that can range from the occassional wearing of panties to undergo physical transition to become a girl and some are on a journey whilst others may not or can not want to move across the spectrum. CDH can serve a purpose for all of us but not necessarily exactly the same If there is an aspect of someone's post that does not fit in with where you are in yourself providing it is not offensive just move on to a other thread but as has already been expressed in this thread there is no need to attack or criticise others.

Rachel

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Posts: 225
Lady
(@nylonlace)
Reputable Member     Oklahoma, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Thank you for the beautifully written and well thought out post. I totally agree with everything you stated. We are all in different stages of our journey. Some will strive to transition fully to a woman. Others will just be happy occasionally wearing a pretty pair of panties or other article of lingerie. Both should be accepted fully here as well as everything in between. If we can't agree on that simple ideal then I cannot imagine how we can expect the rest of the world to accept us how we are.

Hugs,

Emily

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Posts: 0
Guest
(@Anonymous)
New Member
Joined: 1 second ago

‘Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always’

S x

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Posts: 37
Lady
(@carhill2mn)
Trusted Member     Plymouth, Minnesota, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

I am sure that there will be some thoughts posted. I am a firm believer in the old saying
"If you can't say something good, do not say anything"

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Posts: 294
Lady
(@gigi1969)
Reputable Member     orillia, Ontario, Canada
Joined: 5 years ago

Thank you so much for your well said/written observation Autumn. Our collective journey does include all of us. Wouldn't it be boring if we all had the same tastes and endeavors? To each her own in this wonderful place we all actively enjoy. Gigi P.S. you are top drawer my dear.

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