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What advice would you give to your younger self, particularly to help them with their CD/TG journey?
My advice would be to love and accept my whole self. Shame kept me as a prisoner for decades.
Looking back, I could maybe have started down the road I'm now on, twenty years earlier.
So I'd say, listen better to yourself. Think what might be behind your enjoyment of some things traditionally seen as more feminine. Take more notice of your interest being piqued by topics of transition and trans-related issues, in news and other media. Don't just dismiss your daydreams.
like everyone else on here. i should have started 40 years earlier, but i was married then and had no thought of being a cd. but when i started to do it, i went full speed ahead. and have done more than most that have been doing this for over 30 years. just dress and do it. don't wait forever and miss your chance to have some fun. you could drop dead anytime.
I would say first, you are not a freak. Second there are many just like you. Third we are the lucky, ones to walk in 2 worlds. Fourth listen to Lorraine, her feelings will guide you. Fifth, wear high heels every chance you get, as in old age your ankle will not allow them. 😢
Tell your future wife about it while you are dating, instead of suppressing the urge for 30 years.
- "Someone's reaction to you says everything about them and nothing about you."
- "Everyone you meet is going through something you know nothing about."
- "The enemy of good is perfect."
Not that my younger self would have listened, but at least my older self could say, "See...I told you," when I got here.
notes to my younger self :
- be honest and truthful to your future spouse. Introduce the femme side early on in the relationship so it helps with transparency and shows that your are an honest person. Plus it helps fend off purging.
- next point is purging. Being honest with your spouse will help reduce purging. I've tossed out way too many vintage items for fear of being caught.
- buy stuff that you know you'll wear, vs buying everything under the sun. I've tossed out countless items because after one wear it just didn't feel right/look good.
- CDing is an ever changing journey. The CDer I was younger is different than the CDer i am now. It will always evolve.
I don't think I would have listened either.
I would have told my young self: Life is fleeting and you should spend your time doing things that satisfy you. Don't hesitate, youth is running out. Just be yourself before is too late.
Remind Desperado song: "Let somebody love you before is too late". That someone must be you. With all your heart and without fear.
Maybe I would have laughed. They say wisdom comes when youth is gone.
Gisela
embrace your feminine side, make sure your SO/Wife knows about your dressing, if they cannot or will not accept it...move on. Dress often and do not let the shame and guilt over take you.
Don't leave it so long. I would love to see what I would have looked like fully dolled up when I was 30 years younger.
Gosh that's a toughie Valentina.
What would I say? Well it matters not if they are C.D./Trans it may be this.
Be you, be honest with yourself and others, ride the bumps in the road, enjoy the straights and keep going. If it's legal, I will always have your back, guide you and be here for you anytime.
Because they are C.D./trans I'll add,' And before you ask, no you can't borrow my clothes so let's go shopping for you'.....
Dress more, worry less
I would say: don't torture yourself about why you are this way and for your own happiness, accept that's how and who you are. Don't be scared and make the most of your life being who you are and want to be. Life can't be back-dated.
Advice to my younger self: Buy yourself a truly massive wardrobe. You're gonna need it. 😎