Am I more than one gender? And can gender change from one moment to the next?

Some great points, you’ve obviously given this a lot of thought. Thank you for sharing and giving me some food for thought.

Kendra, I believe you can absolutely move back and forth between male and female.  I know when I am dressed in fem I tear up a lot easier when watching the tube.  And when in male mode having relations with another man is disgusting tome but when dressed in fem the thought of being held by a man and having a relationship is exciting to me.  although having a relationship with a GG  is still in my mind better yet.

Sandy

Congratulations you found the right site your a qualified crossdresser give that woman a gold crossdresser badge and stamp her passport HEEHEE

Firstly these are feelings we all have hun literally all of us at least at some point in our lives in this crazy life we lead,

Secondly the test you tool kinda plays on the fact your taking the test and there for well expect you to think your feminin score will be high, so give you a high feminin score. I think mine was like 10%male and 65 feminin. Its more of a fun thing then a real test.

The fact you like being both male and female is well being a crossdresser, you feel different when dressed up in your female cloths, you feel like a women or your perception on what that feels like, but you feel the cloths makeup hair all foreign to the feeling you get from your male cloths, It's exciting to dress up to the feeling you get can feel like a drug it pulls you back to the wardrobe for another fix, It calls to you when you walk past a clothes shop window. To be quite honest keep this to yourself or It will soon be seen as a class A drug lol

Being a man's man so to speak just goes to show your life is not heading down the road to change gender, but will account for your confusion right now as the contrast between you masculine and feminine side are so grate, Something I had to overcome myself

There is a thing called gender fluid where you can change the feeling of your gender from one day to the next but as far as I can see from what you said doesn't seem right for you, But if in your eyes you don't agree with what I have said you may look into that

Hope this helps some

Claire xxx

Hi Kendra,

I think the answer to your question is found in a discussion here at CDH about two weeks ago.  IMO, our identity has three components: a biological identity (plumbing), a gender identity (self-perception) and a sexual preference.  Gender identity is certainly flexible - for most of us.  I know that I can be husband, dad and Grandpa when the role is called for, but for most of the other times, I'm definitely Bettylou, and it matters not whether I'm Dressed and presenting as her or just doing the daily routine.

Hugs,

Bettylou

Alright! I will try to answer some questions but you may not like the answers.

Are you male or female?
You are male.

You are transgender. The term was initially devised to point out that so-called ‘transsexual’ persons were not, in fact, transiting sex but rather were transiting anatomical gender. It was immediately adapted by cross-dressers to reflect gender variance (i.e., transiting gender) and gradually came to include performing artists and others. It has a general application. Basically anyone who transits gender, either back and forth or just once, is transgender. Courtesy suggests that applying the term to some who goes through complete transition may be inaccurate as they are gender invariant and no longer are involved in any process (apart from maintenance of their masculine or feminine anatomy).

There is no such thing as non-binary. Males and females are binary. That’s how it works. That’s how babies are made. We evolved to be binary, male and female. Not opposites but in co-operation to allow the species to reproduce through the exchange and merging of genetic matter. Masculine, feminine and androgynous are separate sets of criteria, not variations of each other and are not binary. So which two genders would you be ‘non-binary’? The term ‘non-binary’ is meaningless and inapplicable. To me ‘non-binary’ is simply a cop-out used by people who do not really want to consider the issues fully and need a term that sounds good or who have been mislead by others using the term.

The term, ‘nonbinary’, began having some increased usage ca. 1956 (0.0000001712% prevalence) but it was in 2011 (0.0000021342% prevalence) that it began to be used frequently (0.0000095855% by 2019), or about 400% increase in prevalence. As with many such terms it began to be used to mean something that it did not really mean in the first place.

Yes, gender is defined socially and is performative and a form of aesthetic creation. It’s a bit more complex than that but think of the French word, genre (English, gender), which we use to refer to types of writing, motion pictures, depictive arts, pottery and other art forms. That is what genre/gender means, ‘types’, ‘kinds’, classifications, etc.

There is no such thing as ‘gender assigned at birth’. That is a conflation of sex and gender substituting ‘gender’ for ‘sex’ referencing a barbaric surgical policy in the 1960s regarding neonates born with ambiguous genitalia. (It was easier to make them ‘female’ and this had drastically unfortunate results.) That policy has been condemned and is no longer considered being medically valid or ethical except in extreme and/or life threatening instances. Gender presentation is a matter of personality development and a neonate has a minimal (nil?) personality and nobody is capable of determining whether any neonate has a preference to be masculine or feminine so you cannot (or at least should not) assign any gender (or sex) at birth. On the other hand, I do feel that each person has a prenatal predisposition to a gender(s) but even so the assumption that a male is or is going to be solely masculine is unfair and a practice that also needs to be abandoned.

The test you took did not define you as 75% male and 51% female but as 75% masculine and 51% feminine. Not only are humans (except for a miniscule percentage due to the Lost Twin Syndrome) either 100% male or female, you cannot have (as you noted) 126% of a single thing. However, you can recognize that femininity and masculinity (as separate types or genders) can exist simultaneously within the same person. They manifest differently at different times and are not variations of the same subset of traits and elements. It is not a contradiction to have a 75% tendency to be masculine and a less intense motivation to be feminine. Sometimes femininity and masculinity fuse into androgyny when one presents aspects of both of the other genders rationally. However, most gender variant persons tend to be wholly masculine (more or less) or wholly feminine at any, one time.

Add to that the question as to what is actually feminine and what is actually masculine probably makes that test inaccurate at measuring anything. If you took the test next week you might get a radically different result. Most of these on-line tests are questionable as to the qualifications of their creators and the accuracy of their concepts.

I suppose everyone is more than one gender. Again it depends on how you and your social environment define gender. The key element, I feel, is, as you say, “When I am putting on lipstick, it is of course because I enjoy looking pretty, but it is also because I feel feminine at that moment.” Again, it is much more involved, for example, “Why do you want to be pretty?”

Because you like sports does not make you male. Lots of females like sports. Liking sports may be considered a masculine trait, but it really isn’t. Conversely, just because you are male that doesn’t mean you have to like sports. Competiveness and aggressiveness are generally (again, erroneously) seen as being solely masculine. You can ‘class’ or ‘typify’ these as in the masculine genre, and you may be correct in theorizing that males tend to be more competitive and more aggressive that females (a question for which I have no response), and your point-of-view might regard such behaviour as masculine, but that is a subjective view that might evolve in time.

Saying, “… maybe the sum of our feminine and male personas add up to more than one…”, gets much closer to the situation. ‘Persona’ comes from the Latin for a theatrical mask, or “… a role or character adopted by an author or an actor….” We all adopt different personas at different times depending on the situation and with whom we interact or even how we identify at any time. Some change ‘masks’ and some change their clothing (including business suits, military or sports uniforms, etc.) either or both.

So, probably, at times you are 100% (or close to it) masculine (in a very general sense) and sometimes 100% (or a bit less) feminine. But you probably have a persistent, inner drive to be feminine.

Araminta.

Hi Kendra

Short and sweet....

In drab at work I'm male and act that way

The rest of the time grace acts, thinks and goes about her life totally female...

That's just HOW it is, I will let others stick on the labels!!

Grace xx

I agree entirely with your summary!

Gender is but a human construct - a way to further define the biological sexes - which, in themselves may be fluid - in a literal sense, since a woman with high testosterone may be bloke-ish, or "butch", and there are very effeminate men.

Maybe you get out of bed one day, and the testosterone is coursing, and it feels like a good day for a drive, a game of football, fixing the car, or whatever.

Maybe your wife is off to meet up with the girls from work - and you really wish you could go too, and be one of the girls for the night, and talk about feminine things or share in feminine activities.

We cross dressers really have the best of both worlds, as far as we can make it so, so yes, it's a massive bonus - way more than 100%!

It maybe doesn't seem that way when our immediate circumstances dictate how we can present ourselves - it doesn't feel right to me - but until we've managed to educate those around us, we feel compelled to keep the parts that might upset others under wraps, and thus operate way below 100%.

The stories from others who have made the leap completely are inspiring, but gender education is mistrusted, as it challenges something that people think they know, which seems fundamental to human existence.

Of course, it is, but not for the reasons many think.

The combinations of sex, gender and sexuality are as varied as human personalities - and as fluid. They can change from one minute to another like a complex, ongoing set of chemical reactions. There are as many combinations as fingerprints.

My thoughts, anyway 😍

Love Laura

Wow some fantastic reading, and assessments. I just put it down to chemistry within the mind, that we are left with the ability to interact, change and adapt to different modes of gender that gives us pleasure and happiness and a choice of how we want to live our lives.

I agree with Betty Lou. I am in that same space.

Kendra that was amazing!! I too have struggled with this very issue. You have clarified a lifetime of curiosity for me!!

Thanks!! Riley 💋

So I will end this post with a happy thought – maybe the sum of our feminine and male personas add up to more than one – and maybe that is a great gift.

I agree, I have come to the same conclusion myself; our capacity to be both is difficult to come to terms with but when we accept it we are more than we could be as either one ...

"… chemistry within the mind…." Very interesting. Not only endorphins, etc, but the fact that hormones are actually mood-altering drugs. Something that really needs examination.

Araminta.

Wow that is a lot of information. Thank you

Guess I am a bimbo because it makes little difference to me if its genetic or chemistry. All I know is I love being both genders fully to the point eventhough I do act more feminine