Are crossdresser transgender??

Hey Cara

I've thought about little else for the past two months. Prior to telling my wife in March I would have described myself as a lifelong crossdresser with frequent fetish overtones (undertones?) Having opened the floodgates I’m increasingly of the belief that the femme side of me is dominant, and I’m trying to see where the path goes.

💕Sera💕

So yes, I think so. If transgender is the broad spectrum between F & M...

💕S🍰💕

Hmmm.

Having re-read my previous post, I have realised that I didn't really get my point across. What I meant was that Trans, Bi, Gay, Hetro etc are all types of sexuality.

Dressing is. well....

its just what a person wears. It may at times be an indicator of the person's sexuality but not necessarily. For example, some gay men are very masculine whilst other's are extremely feminine. Similarly, some cross-dressers are only sexually attracted to female (cis) women, some to men and lots at various points in between.

Then there are people like me who identify as heterosexual [in my case as A-sexual] and whilst in male mode find the prospect of them having a homosexual relationships as abhorrent, but who, when in femme mode would love a sexual relationship with a man.

Sexuality is such a personal and complex thing. It can't be flagged by something as simple as the clothing one wears.

Take care girls.

Anne-Marie.

Cara, the answer to your question depends entirely on how you use the word "transgender". Originally it was coined to distinguish a certain group of people from transexuals and crossdressers. Even that original definition has gotten muddied over the years but it included people who today identify as genderfluid, non-binary gendered, androgynes (Here. Oh, sorry.), and similar identities. I have no idea how or when it also came to mean the entire transgender community. And I certainly have no idea how or why some people (mostly outside the transgender community) see it solely as a synonym for transexual, and the preferred term at that. (My apologies to the person who used the term that way to describe herself. No offense is intended.)

For 20 years I would tell you that while I do crossdress I'm not a crossdresser. (Now I'm not sure if i'm transgendered or just a crossdresser who's a bit different than most.) What I meant by that was that although I wear a mix of mens and womens clothes I do it for the same reason men wear mens clothes and women wear womens clothes. Part of me is still a mix of male and female so it's only natural to me to dress the same way. It's like how cowboys prefer to wear jeans and western shirts. Am I making any sense here?

What makes things even more confusing is there aren't really any hard and fast rules you can use to say "oh, then you're this". Even when you can perfectly describe how you are finding the "right" label isn't always straightforward. I remember very clearly the post I made on a transgender support site where my description of myself fit "androgyne" to a T but I didn't realize that yet. I asked the community what I was. One of the mods replied that I knew what I was but it might take a little time for me to realize it. This was 20 years ago and I still remember it like it was yesterday.

Someone posted in this thread that some people here are really more transgendered than they realize. I agree. But that's my opinion and I wouldn't dare tell them "hey, you know...". What anybody identifies as or what they choose to call themselves is a very personal matter. Two people who say the exact same things may call themselves two different things.

Confused? Good. That means you understand perfectly. If you want you can spend some time really trying to get to know what all these terms and identities mean but remember that everything you read is simply someone's opinion, no matter how common that is. I don't care what I call myself. Like I said in my profile, a rose by any other name and all that. But some people are going to know what identity to use for me as a shorthand. I'm kind of partial to the identity some people who have gone beyond labels like to use: "flying spaghetti monster".

In short (there you go again with that word "short" Amber) don't worry about it. You say potato, I say potahto, let's call the whole thing off.

I think you can be a crossdresser and have no feelings or desire to be the opposite sex.  There are many crossdressers who just like the clothes and feel there should be no gender restrictions on the clothes you wear.  You can also emulate female features with breastforms, wigs and other things.  And still have no interest in going through the transgender phase.  So I think crossdressing and transgender are two different things.  With transgender, you feel you are the wrong sex and want to change to make it right.

...in this context I found this interesting, especially this bit for me:

“There's no wrong way to be trans or nonbinary; if you feel like those words approximate what you're feeling, then run with it. The only person who gets to decide your gender, and what that means, is you. (And I don't want to freak you out, but dysphoria can intensify after you come out to yourself — think of it as your brain finally giving itself permission to feel.)

https://www.them.us/story/how-do-i-know-if-im-transfeminine/amp

Seraphina 💕

Many of you are still confusing the term Transgender with the term Transexual. As terms, they are not mutually exclusive. While a transexual is in fact transgender, a transgender is not necessarily a transexual.

If you are a transvestite (crossdresser) you are in fact transgender, though not necessarily a transexual.

Transgenderism is irrespective of sexuality.

Transgender people have a gender identity or gender expression that differs from their sex assigned at birth.<sup id="cite_ref-Altilio_1-0" class="reference">[1]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-Forsyth_2-0" class="reference">[2]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-Berg-Weger_3-0" class="reference">[3]</sup> Some transgender people who desire medical assistance to transition from one sex to another identify as transsexual.<sup id="cite_ref-Bevan_4-0" class="reference">[4]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-Polly_5-0" class="reference">[5]</sup> Transgender, often shortened as trans, is also an umbrella term. In addition to including people whose gender identity is the opposite of their assigned sex (trans men and trans women), it may include people who are not exclusively masculine or feminine (people who are non-binary or genderqueer, including bigender, pangender, genderfluid, or agender).<sup id="cite_ref-Forsyth_2-1" class="reference">[2]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-glaad.org_6-0" class="reference">[6]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-Bilodeau_7-0" class="reference">[7]</sup> Other definitions of transgender also include people who belong to a third gender, or else conceptualize transgender people as a third gender.<sup id="cite_ref-Stryker3G_8-0" class="reference">[8]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-Chrisler_9-0" class="reference">[9]</sup> The term transgender may be defined very broadly to include cross-dressers.<sup id="cite_ref-ReisnerEtAl_10-0" class="reference">[10]</sup>

Being transgender is independent of sexual orientation.<sup id="cite_ref-apahelp_11-0" class="reference">[11]</sup> Transgender people may identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual, or may decline to label their sexual orientation. The term transgender is also distinguished from intersex, a term that describes people born with physical sex characteristics "that do not fit typical binary notions of male or female bodies".<sup id="cite_ref-unfe-fact_12-0" class="reference">[12]</sup> The opposite of transgender is cisgender, which describes persons whose gender identity or expression matches their assigned sex.<sup id="cite_ref-cisgenderdef_13-0" class="reference">[13]</sup>

The degree to which individuals feel genuine, authentic, and comfortable within their external appearance and accept their genuine identity has been called transgender congruence.<sup id="cite_ref-10.1177/0361684312442161_14-0" class="reference">[14]</sup> Many transgender people experience gender dysphoria, and some seek medical treatments such as hormone replacement therapy, sex reassignment surgery, or psychotherapy.<sup id="cite_ref-Maizes_15-0" class="reference">[15]</sup> Not all transgender people desire these treatments, and some cannot undergo them for financial or medical reasons.<sup id="cite_ref-Maizes_15-1" class="reference">[15]</sup><sup id="cite_ref-16" class="reference">[16]</sup>

https://www.dictionary.com/browse/trans-

From this, I would say yes.

Cross dressing is an act of going through or above gender norms.

We defy the common description of how a person with our assigned gender should look, or even be.

Transgender works for me - although I think common usage is narrower, and defines a Transgender person as one who has completed a physical change, rather than simply put on clothing associated with the opposite sex.

Words can be such slippery things!

Love Laura