Welcome to Crossdresser Heaven, a safe and welcoming place for everyone in the crossdresser community.
Join Crossdresser Heaven today to participate in the forums.
As a crossdresser, has anyone ever labeled you a perfectionist?
I'd in some ways. When I do something I want it to be right, correct and proper.
This does lead to infighting of myself. Sorta me saying he said she said. She often wins! 🥰
@gafran Hi Fran,
Sandie has a similar situation: both Sandie and her male half, when doing a task or job, both want a just right outcome, or not at all.
And, if it comes down to Sandie and her male half, just like your situation, Sandie is usually the winner.
Sandie and her male half are borderline perfectionists, I would say.
Tc girlfriend.
Hugs,
Sandie ❤️.
Hi Sandi,
Although we are at opposite ends of the continental US our girly self's sure play on the same team!
XOXO Fran 🥰
As a crossdresser, as a home decorator, actually as anything, Never! 😂😂😂
@sandie9832t I am often labeled this way. In some ways it's good, but in other ways it's a handicap. At times, it leads to paralysis since I am not able to accept something as "good enough" even when it really is. I guess its a form of OCD. You can only imagine how this has affected me relative to my gender expression. I have to plan my appearance out in advance in my head or it just doesn't feel right. Then when out, I need to be continually conscious of how I am presenting myself. It can be exhausting at times. Fortunately, I am at the point now where I am able to forget how I am presenting and just get on with living after a short time. Still, I wish I could just wake up this way.
@lauren114 Hi again Lauren,
I have the same problem: Sandie and her male half have to have things just a certain way, or not at all. Things have to be done properly for both Sandie and her male half.
I've found that if Sandie and her male half loves ❤️ themselves more, they don't have to be as precise and exacting about everything. We're only human, and a mistake here and there is normal. Things can be a little less perfect.
Also, self affirmations help too. Have both sides repeat a positive or loving thought in the mirror once a day, is very beneficial.
Hope i was able to help, if even with just one idea?
Tc girlfriend,
Sandie ❤️.
Hardly. My crossdressing has been organic, changing as I learn and dress more. I have made mistakes that I try to recognise as such and try not to repeat, but I wouldn't call that perfectionist.
I also don't dress fully en femme with make-up and such. Make-up that isn't perfect is a bit of a problem, no?
@harriette Hi Harriette,
That sounds fair enough. We all learn from our mistakes, I agree.
Tc.
Hugs,
Sandie ❤️.
I've never been accused of being a perfectionist whether dressing or not.
I do get frustrated with make up though. I don't wear it often enough to get good at it and when I do put it on I'm in too much of a hurry. As the saying goes "practice makes perfect" and I don't get enough practice. As for the clothes I wear I do pretty good at putting outfits together matching things. My wife calls me her fashionista and looks to me for what to wear. When we go shopping she will have me help her pick out clothes for her and says she would never have considered some of what I pick out but likes it.
Far from being a perfectionist but it is fun working toward being one.
XOXO
Suzanne
@cdsue Hi Suzanne,
That's very encouraging what you said about your wife. Sandie is glad to hear it. Very positive.
Also, happy to hear you pick out nice outfits.
Tc girlfriend,
Hugs,
Sandie ❤️.
I accuse myself of being a perfectionist, but not in cross-dressing. When I cross-dress I know I am fighting against biology and age. I can never be perfect, no matter what I do or for how long I do it; that doesn't stop me trying.
Where I am a perfectionist is in my written and spoken language. I read and re-read my posts here on CDH before pressing 'Reply' and I put punctuation in all my text messages. I try to speak properly and not drop aitches.
I have, and expect others to have, good manners; manners cost nothing.
So yes, I am a perfectionist in some ways, not so much in others. When it comes to things like DIY, I'm very much a "that'll do" girl.
Becca
@rebeccabaxter hi Becca,
Sandie is a lot like that too. Trying to be perfect, but she is excellent with her speaking and writing skills. Borderline perfectionist, I would have to say, in that area too.
As for crossdresser, Sandie does have to get it just right. It almost has to be perfect.
Hugs,
Sandie ❤️.
Definitely no Perfectionist here my SO says my outfits are unnatural and always refers to me as a stripper and when I do make up I look more so I should be working the street corner
As an Aspie yes but as a perfectionist never. I am incredibly brilliant in some ways but also incredibly stupid in some of the most common interactions with others. I used to think of myself as a person who only spoke English in the middle of a country that only spoke French. It has taken me a lifetime to learn the language of the NT's (neurotypical population) but I got it figured out and now do what I can to help the others in Aspieland. Thanks Sandie for this thought provoking question. Marg, who will look you in the eye and smile when talking.
I have been told and accused of that forever! If I can't do it perfectly then it isn't going to get done, why bother if it isn't done to perfection?
Perfect example as a trans woman, the girls at MAC say I should give lessons because my makeup is so perfect. My attitude is this, If I want to be seen as a woman, I need to make sure I look perfectly put together!
Hugs girls, the perfect way to love my sisters:)
Ms. Lauren M
@reallylauren Hi Lauren,
Sandie couldn't agree with you more! Sandie and her male half both say if it isn't just right, it isn't worth doing.
Hugs,
Sandie ❤️.
There are some things I view myself as being a perfectionist about. Crossdressing is not one of them, I just try my best, experiment and a femme day is a day of relaxation for me.
Anna xx
@annaredhead Hi Anna,
Sandie has to do things a certain way, or she looks at as not worth doing. Same goes for her male half, just right, or not worth doing.
I'm glad you don't try to be perfect crossdressing. Sandie is happy for you.
Tc girlfriend.
Hugs,
Sandie ❤️.
I used to be an industrial electrician. The job covered all aspects of electrical work from putting plugs on portable machines, to designing and building huge control panels for production lines. There was also a lot of multi cable installation.... Cable installations had to be perfect. A lot of planning went into the routes so cables didn't cross over (where they could be seen). When building control panels the layout was meticulously planned and all cables were neat and tidy. Panels looked neat and tidy inside and out. I wasn't a perfectionist, I just had pride in my work and I knew that many enelctricians would follow behind me.
When it comes to how I dress. Male me is a scruff. I throw on whatever is laying by the side of the bed in the morning. Cerys, on the other hand has to be perfect. I can sopend an hour choosing and re-choosing the outfit for the day. Even if I'm not intending to go anywhere, Cerys has to be perfect. This drives my wife mad!If we are going our for the day, my wife sets an alarm and kicks me out of bed early, just so I can shower, shave, put my face on and get Cerys ready. She knows that this is at least an hour. She also knows that even when I'm dressed, I will still spend considerable time choosing the jewellery. That is every bit as important as the clothes.... Then as we are ready to leave, it's time to choose the handbag.... This is where my wife starts throwing stuff at me 🙂
Cerys has to be perfect!
Cerys
@dazzler hi Cerys,
Sandie hears you loud and clear. Sandie is very similar, including her male half: if it isnt just right, I either start over, or say it isnt worth doing.
Tc girlfriend,
Sandie ❤️.
