being unfaithful or not?

Hmmm, that really depends on where your values lie.  Some flirting is okay, I think many of us may engage in that to one degree or another at times - harmlessly.   Gets " rather naughty "  is a little vague, but if sexually explicit photos ar changed, that for me is crossing the line.  Be it with another man or woman, crossdresser or not, is irrelevant. Mostly, it's pretty ignorant and insensitive towards your partner,  I'd think.  You know, your partner ..... the one you love (?)

Just my old school 2 cents

Stevie

If you feel it's not right then don't do it.

Similar topics have come up on advice columns numerous times, usually a spouse sending a lot of flirty texts or pictures to someone and hiding it from the other spouse.  In all cases the columnist says it is at the very least emotional cheating.  Sugar coating it doesn't change the fact.  The fact here that it is a crosdresser getting naughty with men doesn't change anything either.  It is definitely being unfaithful, and she has a right to feel betrayed.

IF you can restrict the definition of "unfaithful" to "doing it", then this is not cheating.  But pretend it is the GG spouse who is being naughty online. How would the husband feel about it?  I place this in the category of foreplay, and absolutely verboten!

Bettylou

If your S.O. is hurt by it or feels betrayed it is cheating and being done with no regards for her feelings. Either get her approval or stop it.My wife approves and encourages my relationships with men, if she didn't I would not even flirt with men.

I can't say that I've never been tempted. I can't even say that I've never acted on those temptations, online. However, I do tend to think that such behavior tends to involve "playing outside of marriage." If the CD didn't want to stay with the wife, or thinks of the wife as only a friend, or thinks that polyamory or multiple partners is the way he has to go, he should at least discuss that with her, and be prepared for all possible outcomes.

It cheating, simple as that.  How would the friend feel if his partner were sending pictures of herself to other men

i know I’d feel cheated....hang on that exactly what my ex wife did do

I do believe that there is a strong, ethical component to marriage that any self-respecting person should adhere to. It is simply the right thing to do. Even in intimate matters there is the feelings of the other person to consider and consideration for others is a key element to being mornal.

On the other hand the paternalistic concept of one person 'owning' another person is repellent to me. Granted that should any person I feel to be in a relationship with, especially a formalized relation, engage in a sexualized relationship with another individual I would be initially hurt and my sense of proprietary rights would be outraged. But rationally it is the fear of abandonment more than anything else that raises such ire. Possibly in males it is an instinct to insure the perpetuation of one's own genes to the exclusion of that of other males. With females it appears to be a loss of security and the feeling of loss of affection. Certainly the concept of females as possessions (chattels) not only appears to persevere, but even to thrive.

Logically it is their body to do with as they wish. Logically so long as the love between us still thrives and they remain true to the commitment to be together, to be a family, where's the harm. Logically, if I really love them should I place bounds on their affection? Surely I should choose rationality (which is not as emotionally cold as some may think because it means consideration for someone you love) over blind rage (which does not mean caring for others so much as selfishness).

Because I am married that does not mean that I do not find women attractive. I do not subscribe to the notion that one can only have one true love. I have had the privilege of being in relationships with several truly marvellous ladies, loved them all and remember them fondly. If there was any failure it was on my part and it is that failure I regret.

So, ultimately the concepts of 'cheating' or being 'unfaithful' ring false to me and seem to be contrived of (continuing the metaphor of bells) to be cast of cheap, flawed and miscast metal. Couples meet, come together for a time and sometimes part. Someone who joins to you for life is your friend and companion. Placing inequitable restrictions upon their behaviour is neither friendly nor companionable.

Even so, I would hope that these matters would be conducted openly and amicably. Alice Novics of, "Alice in Genderland", spends one day of each week as a woman with her male lover. Her wife knows, does not really approve but understands and does not want to know the details. Or so my reading of that story goes. To many this would be repulsive but to me it seems equitable and conducive to the happiness of each person. Is not the "pursuit of happiness" considered by some to be an "inalienable right"?

On the other, other hand, Stevie is right. One must consider the needs, sensitivity and right to awareness of anyone with whom you have made a compact. Emotional entanglements have a cost that needs to be considered and sometimes that is, in fact, the relinquishing of one's freedom to act on impulse.

Love means trust but it is also means forgiveness when that trust seems broken. At least that is how I interpret the words of a man speaking a couple of millennia ago.

Araminta.

If someone in a marriage has to find excitement outside of the marriage in any way that is cheating. It is also dangerous and in many cases hurtful to the point of ruining a marriage.

I bet the other partner is thinking am i not enough? Do i not give excitement? If they will go this far how much further will it go?

I think he should stop and think about what he or she wants. But also be prepared for some one to hack their computer or even stalk and possibly blackmail.

Stevie

To me, cheating is cheating.  When you enter into marriage, you are giving your S.O. your sacred word of honor that you will be faithful to them.  And when you have ANY kind of sexual encounter (real or virtual) with anyone OTHER than your S.O. (without your S.O.'s blessing), that's marital infidelity and it's wrong.

Cross dressing can be fun, once the husband and wife work out the marriage issues.

We have been married 45 years, and we have no secrets.

Some couples define their marriage as "open."   In the secular sense, my wife and I define our marriage as "closed," just her and me

Love you Sis...

Dr.T.J.

it is cheating simple as that, as a male you might not see it, but as a women it is cheating

that's my opinion anyway

hugs Paula

So I know a person who is married, and is also a crossdresser. The Male S.Os femme self gets rather naughty with other men online. He feels that this is not being unfaithful to his wife,even when pictures are shared. She on the other hand, feels betrayed, but is unsure if she is just being selfish, or closedminded. what do you think?

I am going to work this question backwards.

She feels betrayed. Is she selfish , close-minded ?  Perhaps she is, but those are her feelings and she has every right to her feelings as he does to his. However, he seems to be indifferent to her feelings and prioritize his feelings over her and the marriage.  Her acceptance of his crossdressing I would imagine had caused her to already deal with conflicting feelings and emotions, but she appears to have set those aside to allow him the privilege and pleasure to enjoy and express his own feelings.  Is he cheating?  I am not one to answer that because my understanding of cheating would be different than most peoples.  I will say this though, I would never disrespect or dismiss my partners feelings after she granted me already so many concessions. Unless I was attempting to destroy my marriage, i would draw some heavy boundaries around myself and sit down and discuss her feelings, allow her to work through them, assure her that she is the most important person in my life and give her the respect of acting appropriately while I am dressed.