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What does it take to go out in public as a CD?
Thanks for reply, seems like you have been enjoying the planning and no pressure experience, good for you. Yes no need for pressure on you for sure , you should enjoy every time you dress and go out. Love Angela
A lot of nerve and confidence, lets not forget about a smile.
I want to appear as feminine and as natural as possible. So I will dress like any other woman in may area. I will stand tall smile and before I go, check my makeup, nail polish and make sure I have all my womanly accessories. I am going out in August and I am planning to make an appointment at Sephora for a makeover.
As others have already said, what it takes is confidence. Confidence to do it is the start, but if you can project that confidence so that others can see it then you will go far.
Go for a walk somewhere safe but lightly populated and where you can avoid people.
My first time out was thanks to a dressing service. In London. So my first time out was to go a couple of doors down to a small cafe with the lady who ran the service. Pretty public. After a coffee I felt comfortable enough to go for a walk. Along a busy London street at lunchtime. I was out for half an hour. On my own.
After that I felt I could do anything. And I still do.
My first time out (this spring) I guess you could say was semi-public. I dressed and met with a group of CDs at a local women's clothing consignment shop owned by a trans-friendly woman. The hardest part was probably walking from the car into the shop! Since then I have dressed and gone out shopping, to dinner, and to some trans friendly bars.
Many good suggestions in this thread. It is helpful to go with a friend/SO, especially in urban areas. Hold your head up, shoulders back a bit, and smile every so often to those who pass by. Enjoy and have fun!
Hold your head up, shoulders back a bit, and smile every so often to those who pass by. Enjoy and have fun!
This is good advice. You can go a long way if you walk around like you are supposed to be there.
Like Stephanie said self confidence and I'm going to throw in self acceptance. Don't look at yourself and say I'll never pass, not many of us do. Turn the clock back 35 years when I was a skinny young thing with real long blonde hair, yeah I could pull it off but now, it's not going to happen. I went out yesterday, capris, a blue silk cami, a cotton white blouse over top with 2" heels and light makeup and I felt great, I felt good about me. Now you can walk out the door. I didn't even wear a wig, it was 41 C with the humidity, not a chance I was wearing a wig. I went and did a bit of shopping, got some great deals, another story. Chatted with the girls at the store and stopped at a little pub for a nice cold lime and lager and gabbed with the bartender. Actually talked to a couple of people at the bar, they had our PM on TV and he's easy to make fun of, what an idiot. So there you go, that's all there is to it. It doesn't matter what you're wearing, just be nice, smile and be you.
I went out on 12-9, boy it was cold. black leather mini skirt with glossy hose, also black leather motorcycle jacket in low heel shoes and wide brim hat. I sat on a park bench in the center of main street with legs crossed, some cars went by and noticed but did not have trouble, they starred like I looked pretty, which is what I told myself. it was, the most exciting feeling, yes it was dark and they only had a glimpse but it made me realize how much I enjoyed it. I encourage u to try it!
Courage but more so, confidence.
I have not read any replies yet so forgive me if I'm redundant.
I was thinking about this very thing today as I planned to be as femme as I dare, going to a place we have not been to before.
I think what is really difficult is you want to go out in places that are familiar to you, but that induces the anxiety of running into someone you know. If you go to a place that is unfamiliar and something adverse occurs, you may have trouble finding your way.
Again like everything else, small steps are best so that you build up your confidence. A quick trip to the store, walking around an outdoor mall early before many patrons arrive, quick trip to the gas station or anywhere you might be able to linger for a while.
All of this goes towards building that confidence and refining your behaviors. Your walk, your presentation, everything. As your confidence builds and you are comfortable with yourself, then the only stares you will get when you are out are due to the fact that you look (and feel) Fabulous!
Go get 'em Gurls!
Rebekka!
There are many possible combinations.
From those who think that if you don’t look like a pretty woman you better don go out, to those who don’t attempt to look like females and just really don’t care about what others may think.
The thing in common is, like it has been mentioned before, self confidence. Which can come from thinking that you look good enough to knowing that you can accept the risk of being read. Yes, thick skin is a good accessory. Even those who may think they are “100%” passable can and will be read. The voice, the walk, how you hold a glass, so many things.
More than anything else, that self confidence should come from self acceptance. Accepting yourself. Loving who you are, it will project onto others. And will be the first step into being accepted by others. And being accepted is much much better than just passing, IMHO.
Gaby 💜
Blending in. For example: don't wear a dress you would wear to a night club to go shopping. You don't want to stand out in a crowd.
Blending in. For example: don’t wear a dress you would wear to a night club to go shopping. You don’t want to stand out in a crowd.
Yes. This is essential advice. And it's possible to stand out *and* blend in if you pick the right outfit. But dress for your environment.
Perfect answer!
Love Laura