Feeling discouraged...

Hey Lexi, go ahead and vent sweetheart, that's what we're here for. Your absolutely right, the world is very shallow and hung up on looks especially for women, they look at the shell, not what's inside. I worked with 2 women that this makes me think of, Karen, not the greatest looking but very smart, really funny and a great worker, she was just a useless bitch according to the cavemen I worked with. Women #2 Jeanine, very beautiful and knew it also useless and lazy. She'd flirt with the guys, wore tight jeans and low cut tops and the neanderthals ate it up. I got sick and tired of her crap and yelled at her one day, guess what, I was the biggest asshole on the face of the planet and actually got into 2 altercations over it.

You keep plugging away at it and don't let the superficial ones drag you down. Your talent will show through and you will succeed and when you have your first concert a bunch of us girls will come  and cheer for you.

You take care, I can't wait until your famous so I can brag that I know you.

Smile, love Heather.

That is rough to hear and I'm sorry to hear it. Go ahead and vent it is incredibly important to let it out, especially if its more than just this. A little venting can go a long way.

And don't let it get you down. It can take a long time for anything to really gain traction, especially music. It is easy for photos to start traveling cause all it takes is a glance to tell if you like it. Music takes a long time to worm its way in. Plus once the ball gets rolling it can snowball , so give it time, keep trying and I'm sure you'll manage.

I think it is also important to note that if you were primarily photo focused before it might taken time for the music to catch on just cause its different. People come for the photos and the music is just there.

Ultimately I am not going to make any real statement about music cause I have been cursed with a tin ear and am quite bad at anything to do with it, including enjoying it. Just keep trying and don't let the first stumbling back be your downfall. If you enjoy it, do it.

Hi Lexi,

I am sorry you feeling discouraged.

I always try to look on the bright side of things.

So at least your getting to do what you love and your getting to do it as Lexi.

I think that is so awesome.

Sometimes things take time and besides you have your own fan club here

Hang in there girlfriend.

Patty

Hi Lexi

As a frustrated songwriter myself, with a max of 40 odd views on any of the 30 odd songs I have on YouTube  I feel that.

I've always clung to the notion that the art should sell itself.

But I don't think that's ever really been true except for, well, exceptional circumstances, and quite often after the artist has passed away - only then is the true genius recognised.

There's no shame in marketing an image or brand - people expect to get the whole package.

It's part of your art, and it's part of Lexi,

There's no such thing as bad publicity, so use what you got to sell the music, and enable yourself to write more!

Love Laura

Thanks! I appreciate the support - one of the things that makes this site special...

Cheers,

Lexi

Hi Lexi,

We live in a crazy world. Everyone I know, including myself is struggling with depressive thoughts. I feel like we all need each other here for support. Hang in there girl!

Hugs

Kay

Dear Lexi

First I am on FB too  just feel free to connect as Geraldine Martin

Second, "My takeaway – most people online really only care about photos of crossdressers. Don’t get me wrong, I’m flattered by the compliments I get on my photos" : you are right  this is the world, people (usually men) looks to crossdressers as sexual fantaisies.   Of course sometimes they are right. But in many cases, we just try to become what we are... and it's take time, efforts and may be so luck if we can meet some helping and nice friends...

Keep going on !!

Lexi, My 2cents. 1st I will try to find your music and give it a listen. but the point I want to make has nothing to do with the results of your project but more to focus on your effort. You invested a significant amount of your time. We as people often feel a bit of a let down after the high of completing a project. I am not saying your observations are not valid, but some of the feeling down can be just from the emotional exhaustion you are experiencing. Good for you to complete your music project. The other big let down can come from putting yourself out there. not just as a singer/songwriter but also exposing the most venerable part of yourself, your personal feelings. With any investment, try to give it time. Continue to promote your work and share it.Thanks for sharing here. It's nice to hear other voices that are struggling with things. life is a struggle, we need voices to help us find our paths and stay on our paths.

hi and i can relate to it as well - not the more likes on any of my pics than music (i pretty much took down a lot on my FB for some other reasons, but holly is on a lot of other sites without much fan fare) and holly really isn't involved in my music (could expand on that in a post i guess) but totally relate to the feedback or lack thereof regarding music and pre-pandemic live music. the band i'm in posted a few memes saying that we played to less people before covid gathering limits 😛 been trying to focus on just making good music but i get the being discouraged part for sure... having said that, is there a link to your music on your profile? i apologize if it is i got caught up reading and writing back in here 🙂 would like to take a listen to what you're doing.

ty and stay strong! m/

holly

Hi Lexi,

I think inevitably you will get a lot of attention because of your looks, you put a lot of effort in and are stunning as a consequence.  I guess all musicians probably feel they are banging their heads against the wall at some time or another, but you have out so much into it, it would be a shame to give up now. I know many women wonder whether they have a following because of looks, I expect some the boy band singers with real talent felt the same way. Personally I would seek to turn it to my advantage. I wonder if there is a market for your music among the LGBT community? I don't know if you have tried to present like that, or are even like the idea of performing and selling your art as Lexi. I guess public appearances etc. might be too much. In some ways I'd say use your beauty and your crossdressing to draw attention to your music. Don't ever forget Billy Jo, lead singer of Green Day cross dresses, and sings about it e.g. King for a Day.

One thing I see in this is how far ahead you must be of most the people coming to your facebook page.  You have something that very few other crossdressers get to have, which is that not only do you know what it is to exist openly from Lexi's perspective, you have had the experience of creating something in Lexi's perspective.  And of the world knowing you and seeing you as Lexi while you did it.  I may be wrong, but I don't get the impression that many crossdressers would know just what that feels like, enough to realize it should be of great importance to them. Nor can many relate to that achievement yet, because the very basics of discovery, self-acceptance, and existence en femme are such formidable things to confront and overcome. Just those things alone can take a lifetime.

I'm certainly not there. The closest I've come to that is handling work crises over the phone on my days home, and imagining what those on the other end of the phone would think if they realized that it was really Ms. Jill they were taking direction from. And thinking it would serve all of them right if they did know, and the middle finger they'd get back for being shocked, just shocked!  That's a long way behind where you are.

I also think the repression to later in life that is so common to so many personal stories, is one of the things that unfortunately ends up sexualizing it permanently for some.  Finally allowing expression to an impulse that there is a deeply socially ingrained instinct to repress distorts things.  Since it coincides with coming of age sexually that charges it in a way it might not be otherwise, it if it were allowed to just exist naturally from its point of origin, which for many of us was as a child or adolescent.  There was some of that oversexualization in my own dressing too and I'm glad that over time that has diminished and my focus has turned outward to at some point joining the world en femme.  The world at large however still seems fairly content to pigeonhole cross dressing as a sexual fetish and that type of repression is something that is only just beginning to change, but still very real.  So yes, a great many people will still only see the stockings and heels and it will take another generation or so to sort out.  You are showing the way to what is possible once all that is behind us so it may be natural that you are out front all alone but I hope you keep pushing ahead.

I access all my music through youtube.  Is yours available there?

Hi Jill - thanks for your thoughts! I agree.

I'm not on YouTube yet, but you can stream if for free on Soundcloud, if you like:

https://soundcloud.com/leximoonmusic/sets/never-too-late

Hugs!

Lexi

Natasha - you are too kind! I haven't ever performed as Lexi (would need a full band for that, which is a whole can of worms), but I'd like to think I could get some traction in the LGBT community. Just not sure where to start...

Thanks,

Lexi

Lexi, the first thing I would like to say is well done! You have achieved an enormous amount, I like music, who doesn't, but I wouldn't say I am a music lover if you know what I mean. I think the problem here is you have two very different audiences, on Flickr your followers are following you for how you look, that would not automatically translate into following you for how you sound. So the conundrum is how do you convert some (lets be fair not all are going to be interested) from following you on Flickr to buying your record. I am not in any way a expert on marketing, but there must be a way. My thought is to do a short vid, something a little different, something that will grab their attention, without being outside your comfort zone, and at the same time introduce a bit of your music. It might work? Marketing is the key, tapping into the LBGT market is a possibility, perhaps talk to LBGT radio stations, there must be some in the US, there are a few in the UK......... Don't give up, it won't be easy, but you have made it this far, you can make it all the way!

Andrea x