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It wasn’t that long ago that I first showed up here. Driven by a newfound will and desire to right the wrong of my life. Just coming here and starting to open again has eased my burden and allowed me to hope again.
I have since reached out to some groups I saw. Sadly they were full. Not the start I had hoped for. Understand, that’s also something new to me. I’ve been a lone wolf. Need help moving that 200 lb. Boxed swimming pool? “Nah…I got it.”
okay…the look on their face when I actually did it was worth it. 🤭 still, that was no way to be. And that was always somehow seen as a weakness, even though I usually accomplished more aloneu than the “teamwork” folks ever did. 🤷🏻♂️
But I know I can’t do this alone. Some people sound as blaze about it like it’s something I should be able to do as easy as running out and filling out a job application. 😳 I wish it was that simple.
Coming to my realization is one thing. Figuring out how I might do it brought great worry. Last time I stood anywhere near here, the things one had to do just to start this process was rough. And resources could be problematic for me. My mind still fears the worst, but my heart believes my miracle is out there.
Another site I was on I was in a conversation and someone sent me a name of a place to look into, which I did, and I’m speechless. I was almost shaking reading through and seeing all they offered. This is literally it. I’m looking at my miracle! It’s more than I dreamt possible.
Suddenly, I’m finding myself quite emotional. Even getting teary. It’s really dawning on me now that I really can do this!
And my drive towards it is getting stronger every day. Something tells me if I still had those friends I knew so long ago to lean on, I’d already have the appointments booked.
I guess I’m like someone in AA that needs a sponsor. Especially when those hormones start to kick in! I expect some stuff to roaring back out.
I can still wait a bit. I waited this long, I need to make sure I get this right. But my optimism has never been higher. The excitement running through me right now is craaaaaaazy!!!
Steps have been small, but I’ve been taking them. Let’s hope I can run soon!
Amanda -
Welcome to CDH. You have found a place where you can get advice and make friends to help you in your journey. Be sure to check out the forums, articles and join in the conversation in the chat room.
XOXO
Suzanne
Good for you Amanda! I'm like you being a lone wolf. I tried to go this alone but finally dis see a counselor and she helped me immeasurably. it led me to the point now where I feel comfortable as the woman I am and get out into the world regularly as Lauren. It was a long process but like you, I am excited for the future and the amazing things it is bringing me. Fortunately, the world is now in a state where our possibilities are very good and we can realize our dreams. Had these possibilities existed form me earlier in life, I'm sure things would have been very different for me.
Good luck as you proceed on your journey sister! I hope you get everything you wnat and much more!
Hi Amanda, it seems the euphoria is at its highest and nowtime to work out how to achieve those aims.
This area is a huge array of experiences and advice to help you navigate your pathway. Just take a moment, sit back and have a look at what is here and start to work things through and plan your steps.
One tip about hormones, always seek the advice of a physician and not self medicate.