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Going out again -- but which outfit? Decisions, decisions.

15 Posts
8 Users
48 Reactions
207 Views
Posts: 1278
Topic starter
(@rebeccabaxter)
    Cornwall, United Kingdom
Joined: 1 year ago

I have already gone out once but it was wearing trousers and a big baggy jumper, but they were feminine clothes and I wore heels too, and red nail varnish. I hope to go out tomorrow or Thursday and have two outfits ready: one is leggings and a black polo neck jumper the other is a dress, both with heels. I hope to wear the dress as I don't feel I'll have done a 'proper' job if I go with the trousers again -- nice though the look is. I think I'll feel like I've only done half the job as, if I was clocked, I could just be mistaken for someone doing a part-trans androgynous thing rather than actual cross-dressing and I don't want to feel as if I've cheated myself out of the full experience. I will have to wait until the morning of the outing and see how confident I feel.

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14 Replies
10 Replies
Baroness Annual
(@fembecky)
Joined: 5 years ago

Noble Member     Gloucestershire, United Kingdom
Posts: 596

@rebeccabaxter 

Hi Becca, when I started coming out about a year ago my first few ventures out with my wife were in ladies trousers. Then I bought the first skirt and after a while my wife was happy for me to go out wearing it. So taking it slowly is not cheating, and might be the right way to build confidence.

Whatever you choose, have a great day - the weather should be great tomorrow so enjoy it 😀 .

Hugs, Rebecca (in the Cotswolds)

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(@rebeccabaxter)
Joined: 1 year ago

    Cornwall, United Kingdom
Posts: 1278

@fembecky 

 

Thanks Rebecca. Strangely, I had loads of confidence the first time out and had no issues with the outing but since then, I seem to have lost that 'devil-may-care' attitude and the nerves have returned, so perhaps the trouser option might be the best for this next trip out; we'll see.

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Baroness Annual
(@fembecky)
Joined: 5 years ago

Noble Member     Gloucestershire, United Kingdom
Posts: 596

@rebeccabaxter

I would love to hear how it goes, so please let us know how you get on.

I am now very often out enfemme with no worries, but there are still a couple of potential encounter situations that I don't look forward to, so I have avoided them by only underdressing on those occasions. It is entirely illogical that those two situations should bother me, so maybe in time I will have the confidence to face them enfemme.

Rebecca xxx

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Ambassador
(@lucyb112)
Joined: 2 years ago

Noble Member     Staffordshire, United Kingdom
Posts: 1004

@rebeccabaxter 

That also happened to me. On my first trip out I managed more than I expected, and was brimming with confidence, but that seemed to wane after a while and I was actually more nervous the next time around.

You’re right, the trousers may help, they did for me, but I guess you’ll know better how you feel on the day 

 

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Ambassador
(@jacquelinelarkspur)
Joined: 1 year ago

Famed Member     Gateshead, Tyne and Wear, United Kingdom
Posts: 1497

@rebeccabaxter 

I think it's only natural that the nerves will return, because now you have some actual experience to feed them. I know that sounds back to front; you've been out, so you should feel less nervous, right?

Thing is, you now know first-hand the sorts of situations that might have made things more difficult for you. The instinctive reaction would be to dwell on the details of that knowledge, almost expecting them to happen next time out.

As always, the advice is to take sensible precautions and preserve your safety. Chances are that nothing untoward will happen anyway. And besides, crossdressing is all about progress and pushing one's boundaries, IMO.

Personally I've never worn trousers en femme. For me it's dresses and skirts all the way!

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Ambassador
(@alexina)
Joined: 1 year ago

Illustrious Member     Fife, United Kingdom
Posts: 2158

@rebeccabaxter The dress! Oh, and have Great Fun 👗👠

Allie x

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(@finallyfiona)
Joined: 1 year ago

    Leighton Buzzard, Bedfordshire, United Kingdom
Posts: 1444

@rebeccabaxter I admire your fortitude hon 🙂  I couldn't have gone into town yesterday if I was in the dress I first walked out the door in the other week, I only went because I was already in jeans, a jumper and a cardi.  I hope you have a lovely outing and I'm looking forward to reading all about it 🤗

Hugs,
Fiona xxx 

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Lady
(@jillleanne)
Joined: 2 years ago

Prominent Member     Renfrew, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 594

@rebeccabaxter just depends where you are going. If it’s to a football game, skip the dress. If it’s to a rea social, skip the leggings. Easy.

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(@rebeccabaxter)
Joined: 1 year ago

    Cornwall, United Kingdom
Posts: 1278

@jillleanne 

Probably just shopping in the city, lunch if we get up early enough (don't hold your breath), and perhaps a garden centre on the way back to get some kale seeds. There are all sorts in Plymouth, some well-dressed, some not, some lying under cardboard in a shop doorway. There are street musicians here and there and stalls selling hotdogs and the like; it's all quite varied so stand-out-wise I'd probably only really be noticed if I wore a clown suit and stood on stilts!

 

My biggest concern is where to go to the toilet. Fortunately, I have a RADAR key (for our US cousins, that's a special key that allows one to get in to disabled toilets) from when I had prostate problems and a catheter bag a couple of months ago, so I can get into gender neutral toilets -- if I can find them. 

 

I presume you are talking about American football as I doubt there is any way a cross dresser who couldn't pass would go to a UK soccer game as they are often hotspots of racism, homophobia and gender intolerance -- not all football fans are like this but it doesn't take many to make a problem. For example, there are very few, if any, openly gay professional footballers currently playing in the major football leagues over here and fans are often to be heard making monkey noises when a black player from an opposing team gets the ball -- despite their own teams also having black and Asian players. Women's football was a joke for almost it's entire existence but in recent years, common sense and better games (and the fact the women have fewer histrionics when they get tackled) have made the women's game attract very large, mixed audiences now. Gender intolerance, and all the above, in sport, probably merits a thread all its own so I'll move on now as I'm not sure whether the moderators would appreciate me getting political over cross dressing and the like, interesting though it may be. If we did, I could be fairly sure we'd all be on the same side Smile  

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Lady
(@jillleanne)
Joined: 2 years ago

Prominent Member     Renfrew, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 594

@rebeccabaxter no, I meant soccer. Had no idea fans would be that bad. I’ve gone to two NASCAR races en femme and got looks, but nothing to be concerned about, and believe me when I say, Bubba was in the house.🏡

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Posts: 3404
Hostess
(@ab123)
Illustrious Member     Surrey, United Kingdom
Joined: 5 years ago

Isn't the way for girls - what shall I wear? There are so many variables to consider, weather, where we are going, who you're going with and so on. Usually there will be a change after putting something on but I suppose in your case would be if your wife is happy. If she doesn't mind then it is up to you again!

Normal for a girl...

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Posts: 1278
Topic starter
(@rebeccabaxter)
    Cornwall, United Kingdom
Joined: 1 year ago

Did it, yay.

 

I started by trying on leggings and my knee high boots. Unfortunately, I wore the boots yesterday on a long walk and they were brand new, I should not have done that as I got a blister on my big toe. Tried them on today and there was no way I could walk anywhere in them, so I tried my ankle boots, but they didn't go with the leggings so the decision was made; a dress it was going to be.

 

I was nervous while driving to the city but I needn't have worried. I spent about an hour walking around (my feet were still sore from yesterdays boot-wearing), popped into a couple of shops and on the way home, I stopped at a garden centre and bought some kale seeds.

 

I can't be sure, but I don't think I got a second glance from anyone. One old guy with a walking frame said hello but I got the impression he says hello to everyone.

 

All in all, job done and next time shouldn't be a problem.

 

So been out twice now, feeling pleased with myself.

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2 Replies
Ambassador
(@jacquelinelarkspur)
Joined: 1 year ago

Famed Member     Gateshead, Tyne and Wear, United Kingdom
Posts: 1497

@rebeccabaxter 

Well done, Rebecca! You have a good right to be pleased with yourself! It'll get easier from now on.

I hope the toe gets better soon!

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Ambassador
(@alexina)
Joined: 1 year ago

Illustrious Member     Fife, United Kingdom
Posts: 2158

@rebeccabaxter Hi, Rebecca, I'm so pleased for you. There'll be no stopping you now, blisters notwithstanding!

Allie

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