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Hi everyone,
I started crossdressing quite early in my childhood. In the beginning it was just hiding mom's stockings under pillow and secretly put them on at night. As age grows so do the types of girl stuffs I find myself in, high heels, dresses, bras, makeups, etc. However I've never had a truly private dwelling to myself. At Uni I shared the dormitory with other dudes and got married quite soon after graduating. So finding the right place to stash the girl things and to put them on has always been a headache.
I've tried hiring a storage unit and using daytime hotels to dress but they are super costly here in Sydney Australia, as most of the hotels offering day rooms are near the CBD. So I'm in the cycle of buying girl stuff, crossdressing at an unsustainable cost, throwing them away, and starting browsing online again after a while (We all know the longer you hide the girl inside the more she wants to come out and play).
So I'm wondering how you girls in a similar situation are managing it? It's always good to know the stories of others facing the same issue, even though the solutions may not be directly applicable to me.
Thanks a lot
@chloelovesheels I hid my dressing from my wife by storing the clothes, including heels and make up in a bag, then a box in the basement storage, with ‘immediate access’ clothes at the bottom of draws and cupboards. But everything become so much easier once my stash was found and Christine was found out/discovered. I was lucky, my wife was very accepting, but I know this is not always the case. This made everything so much easier. Now I have separate wardrobes for my drab clothes and for my girlie attire. The chance to be yourself, albeit in the confines of home (as is my case) is such a good feeling. Hugs Christine
So I'm wondering how you girls in a similar situation are managing it? It's always good to know the stories of others facing the same issue, even though the solutions may not be directly applicable to me.
In the time that I have been a member here, I have read many stories of how a CD has hidden her stashes. It isn't easy and, depending on her circumstances, not always successful.
So, let me be the one to ask the hard to answer question. Can you come out to your wife about your dressing? While it may complicate your life in someway, it can make dressing much easier. You have to be the judge as to whether she might accept you dressing or not.
@chloelovesheels I used to hide my stuff under the insulation in the attic.or mixed in with the halloween stuff. I heard you mention storage unit , that reminds me of a short story I heard before joining CDH that a guy had a storage unit and eventually got caught and when they went to the unit he supposedly had over 10,000 dresses in there lol OMG thats dedication. Before my wife knew It was very difficult and really made me angry when I purged especially if I had some nice items. so hard to have nice things and keep it hidden. I thought that if I ever needed to purge again I would dig a hole in the back yard and put it all in thick contractor bags and bury it so It could be retrieved. or rent a locker somewhere like the bowling alley , or airport. but that does not solve the personal space issue to dress. Best Idea I can come up with is find a friend on CDH thats in a reasonable distance from you. build on that friendship and maybe collaborate on a personal space or maybe she has one you can use from time to time hmm I wonder if you have many of us in an area how hard would it be to collectively rent a personal space and manage sharing of it. .. Cheers RC
So I’m firmly in the closet and seem to have a stash that’s always growing, despite my attempts to reduce it!
My gear is stored in plastic boxes in the loft.
Fortunately the loft isn’t that easy to get into. In the 20 plus years we’ve lived at our current house, my wife has only set foot up there about twice, and those times were a long while ago.
Over the last couple of years, the number of plastic boxes has gone from 1 to 6 though, so if she does ever decide she wants to go up there I doubt if I could hide them.
I'm probably not the best person to be giving advice.
I'm trans. The burden of hiding became too much to bear. I wasn't just hiding my things. I was hiding from myself.
I came out to my GF years ago. That made the logistics MUCH easier.
Now I live alone and my closet is too small!
/LK
@chloelovesheels this is an ongoing problem for me. I have a discreet spot in my basement where my wardrobe is stored but the collection is starting to become so large it really doesn't fit in this space anymore. It's also not the easiest to access so I tend not to go through the trouble of dressing when short opportunities arise (a few hours or less). It doesn't help that I am still buying new things every few months.
I thought about getting a storage unit but thought that would be even more inconvenient to access. I haven't ruled this idea out entirely yet. Other than my spot in the basement, the only other place I can think of would be the attic.
I know my wife will not be accepting so introducing her to Sophie is out of the question.
I realize what hurdles others go through just to get dressed.
I'm fortunate to be on my own. So no worries about hiding girl things.
The problem is Fran has more girly things than her drab self has guy things!
The things we get into and the lengths we go to just to let our girl out!
Fran 🥰
@chloelovesheels Chole, a very good question and a real dilemma I've dealt with also. Only after wearing my Mother's & young wife's things and storing them back where they went, did I buy my own & start having to hide. Used old suitcases, duffle bags, etc. inside and boxes, old toolboxes, etc. outside. All good until I migrated up to dresses, skirts, blouses, heels, etc. that needed to stay inside a clean place.
A short while after confessing my secret to my wife I learned that she had found my newest dress & shoes a little while earlier. Mine is a series of longish stories about buying, hiding, enjoying, and then purging repeated over & over.
There's multiple answers to your question, for a lonf time, mine was to know where they just don't regularly go. For me, the real answer was just sucking it up and admitting who I am.
I live alone but I still hide my stuff because my family like to rummage around when they come over much to my annoyance. I keep most of my clothes in boxes under the bed
@chloelovesheels i realize my answer was not super helpful lol. Here’s some ideas for hiding clothes; keep it all in a duffel bag or 2 and move it between your house, vehicle, shed, attic, work if need be. Also you could fold clothes up and put them between blankets or towels. Or keep them in some storage bins with some other assorted items on top as a decoy
I am very fortunate that my wife is accepting of my dressing so I can keep all my things hanging in a closet in my study, folded in a 3 drawer storage stand and on top of my desk. Prior to that I kept everything in a duffle bag at the bottom of the closet. Over the years I did a lot of purchase, wear and purge even when living alone out of fear of having it discovered. Yes it could still be an issue but we don't get much company and when we do they don't go upstairs. If there was a need for them to do that I'd simply lock the door to my study.
XOXO
Suzanne
@cdsue On days when I’m not wearing anything I get pleasure just looking at my dresses hanging on my side of the closet when I go by. I think a lot of us just reach the point of not going to hide stuff in suitcases, boxes, etc, anymore.
Telling your spouse about your hobby drastically improves your whole experience😊
Chloe, I wish I could help you. When I was married, I would only buy things when my wife was out of town, wear them and then throw them out, I hated that. Now that I live alone, I keep them in my closet. I still hope I never get someone snooping through my closet and wondering why I have a bunch of girl clothes in there, but I’d probably confess if that happened. But first I’d ask exactly what they were doing in there. So I’d probably never get asked because of their snooping around.
Chloe... My advice, just tell her. Now I DO realize that is a simple solution and things are probably much more complicated than that.
For me, I hate hiding from wifey of 44 years, and told her about 6 years ago that I enjoyed crossdressing. I thought it was the end of the world (her initial reaction was to leave me), but we love each other, went to counseling and after a LOT of talking have come to a happy medium.
I often do think of the gals here who can't tell their spouses for many reasons and have to hide. My best to you all all the others in such a situation.
Smile.... Staci...
People have come with many solutions
Mine was to let my wife know from the start and as my dressing deveopled. It has been a long slow process for to dress fully en femme. I just hang my things in my side of rhe closet and in my drawers in the dresser...problem solved.
Check for CD services in yoir area. Many provide affordable storage and an option to dress in their studio. Small storage facilities are not too expensive and both store things and have enough space to change in, but beware most are monitered by camareas, so driving in and out en femme/en homme might be noticed.
Check for CD services in yoir area. Many provide affordable storage and an option to dress in their studio.
Thanks for this tip, JJ. I had never heard of it before now.
When I was still in the closet I had my things either in a box buried in the corner or in olden days when cars had real spare tires, behind the tire so it seemed like emergency equipment (which it was to me). One outfit with heels was all I could manage. I'm so glad those days are over.
I stored mine in a bin and kept it in the closet, then in the basement then outside, then back in the closet. My wife as much as she doesn’t like me dressing would give me her old clothes that didn’t fit anymore. (Super confusing). For a while I was using her sports bra and leggings drawer. Then she purged and said the sports bras are all yours but I need the space. We took another drawer and it is now mine for bras, camis and sports bras. I also have a drawer with shirts, lingerie and stockings. One of the spare bedrooms is my place to hang my dresses, skirts and tops and I still keep my shoes, jewelry and hip pads in a bin. I also have my own makeup and nail drawer. I guess I’m kinda lucky considering she doesn’t ’like’ It when I dress.
Luckily, I don't have to hide anything as my wife is accepting of my dressing and I have half the big wardrobe and she has the other half (I have another, smaller one for my man-clothes).
We often exchange clothes that one or the other of us doesn't like or isn't comfortable with and this applies especially to jewellery—although I'm more likely to snaffle her stuff than she, mine.
Becs
Chloe, this is a great topic, and so many fascinating responses from the girls here. The general agreement seems to be that there's no ideal solution but to come out to your wife. None of the suggested storage solutions are ideal, and anyway opportunities to dress at home are all but non-existent. It's not clear from your profile whether your wife has any inkling of your proclivity to dress en femme. All I can say is that I sympathise with you hun. I am completely closetted. In June 2023 my family went abroad for 10 days and I went all in. Couple of full outfits, hair, heels, makeup, jewellery. Then purged the lot before they returned. Heartbreaking. We're retired and my wife simply doesn't leave the house for long enough for me to get any girl time, so I currently don't own any femme stuff. My only Chrissie experiences have been a couple of recent makeovers.
I often go through the coming out conversation in my head and it only ends one way so either I go down that route or I'm condemned to a lifetime of frustration. What's a girl to do?
Hugs, Chrissie xx.
Chloe,
OK I'm a "lucky duck",who has a storage unit with one of the big Australian companies . (But that comes back to "the harder I worked the luckier I got")
I also got lucky with the 3 metre square size with light and power. So I store all of Caty's outfits, shoes and make up in it. 90% of my lingerie and sleepwear, (season dependent") is in dresser drawers and in my home wardrobe, in this DADT household Also breast forms and a few shoes. (most of the other units are "black holes" no light or power)
It's also where 90% of the time I do my weekly legs and arms shave. cant get into strife with the "Boss" for leaving shaving mess...Also doing ironing when required on some of my lingerie
I suppose it all depends on how much "Stuff" you have, the spare $$$ you have to pay for the unit and ergo, the size unit you can afford
I've set mine up as a miniature office/shed.Desk, storage cupboard and racks, carpeted, plus small scale heating and cooling.
It's also "decorated" with photos of Caty and back to "male mode" Aussie Rules photos and memorabilia
The only time I avoid going there is on stinking hot Australian summer days.
"CDing is a winter sport"
I drop the roller door and basically can do anything I want in there. (With the exception of needing the loo....)
Hope you can find your right combo of $$ cost and space
Caty.
I have to hide my things in the ceiling then purge when I start to worry to much about being caught. I hate throwing out my nice things but I just don’t feel I can come out.
I'm in a very lucky situation, I have a great boyfriend who is accepting, supportive and encouraging. I dress whenever I want to at home, 99% of my wardrobe is romantic lingerie/sleepwear which I have hung in the closet and wear to bed almost every night. I love looking at all of it hanging in there, it looks like a Victoria's Secret rack of wedding night options. 🙂
Hi Chloe
Great to hear from another Sydneysider. Now I am in a situation where my wife knows about Olivia and my wardrobe is in two bags in our walk in wardrobe. She doesn't want to see me dressed as Olivia so I doubt she has ever looked in the bags but she knows which ones they are.
I was in your situation till 10 or so years ago. I had convinced myself that if my wife ever found out she would leave me and I'd never see my kids again. As it turns out she and my kids now know about Olivia and my relationships with them all are just still great. The best thing about coming out for me was no more lies and having to be secretive. All relationships are different however, and things worked out fine for me coming out to my family but you are the best person to judge if coming out is going to be the right thing for you.
Going back to before I came out to my family I would usually hide my girl clothes in bags in the ceiling under the insulation. I have stuffed clothes in my dirt bike boots which lived on the top shelf in the garage and I had a router that had a box way bigger than how big the router was so I would put clothes in there as well. Like some of the other girls I have hidden clothes under the spare tyre in the boot of the car.
This is the most elaborate effort to hide things I ever did. I was doing some work in Orange. (which is 4 hours drive west of Sydney for those who aren't familiar with New South Wales) I would work 5 days then return two weeks later for another 5 days and this went on for about 4 months. They would put me up in a motel for the 5 days. So on the first trip I bought a plastic storage container. At the end of the trip I put all my clothes and makeup I had bought into the container and drove out into Glenwood State Forest which was about 20 minutes drive out of town and picked a spot to hide my container. I put some branches over it and for 3 and a half months it worked perfectly so I didn't have to buy new girl clothes each trip till the job was unexpectedly cut short before my last trip. 15 years later my box of clothes is still out there in the forest. I'd like to get out there one day and see if it's still there.
A cheaper option I can think for you would be being out at night and to get changed in your car and go for a drive and find a park with no one around to go for a little walk but I'm not sure if you would be ready for being out in public.
I hope this has helped somewhat. I hope you can find a cheaper solution for your time as Chloe.
Wishing you all the best.
Olivia
