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I have observed something here at CDH. Let me preface what I am going to write with this: I understand that the CD / trans community is much larger than CDH. Without doubt within that larger community there are a myriad of exceptions to my observation; many sad, leaving hurting and broken people in their wake. Also I understand that I draw my observation only from what I read on the forums and personal profiles, so my sampling is limited and therefore my observation may be skewed.
My observation:
Like myself, many here are mature to senior citizens [late 40s to late 60s] have been married for two to three plus decades, have a deeply intense love for their wife, have a tenacious commitment to their marriage and to maintaining the integrity of their vows all the while struggling to manage something none of us asked for in our lives, yet is unquestionably real to us. From what I read it seems loyalty to marriage, spouse, and family is fierce; may I say perhaps even more so than in the non-CD / trans community.
I find this inspiring, gratifying, and humbling to be part of such a community.
My wish: I wish others, could be understanding enough to see this loyalty, love, and devotion. As best I can tell these characteristics are genuine.
I can understand why others can't or don't. I suspect I would be much like those who are too close minded to learn and understand. Except for the lessons I have learned and growth that has occurred in my own life as a direct result of living with my own trans nature I would be much like them. In this way being a non-transitioning, non-activist trans-woman has had very positive benefits for me. I am ashamed to think of the obnoxious person I would be if it weren't for what being trans has taught and brought to me. Though it has not been an easy road to travel, the journey has been personally profitable. And for that I am thankful.
Kindly,
Charlene
Hi Charlene
Very well put