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Went out en femme today. I went to a garden centre, where I bought some seeds and pair of new boots, then to a supermarket to buy groceries various, then to Matalan, a clothing shop, before returning home and getting petrol on the way.
Unless there were some looks after I'd passed by, I was unaware of anyone taking any undue interest in me. I didn't see anyone directly and didn't see any strange looks when I checked in a few of the many mirrors in the clothes shop (by doing that, you can tell easily if you are being observed).
I was in full Becca mode: boots, skirt, top, makeup, wig, glasses and my fur-trimmed coat. TBH, I felt like a real girl-about-town.
It was my second trip out this week and I didn't notice any undue attention the first time either, except from a young girl who said she liked my scarf.
My voice is now slightly raised in pitch and softer so I think my vocal Achilles Heel is having less of a detrimental effect.
Hugs
Becca
You are obviously getting good at it as you go about your business without any stares or reaction. I suspect you will soon stop looking around for any reaction as it becomes quite natural for you. It's a great feeling to be just another lady out and about.
Good for you Becca and welcome to the world. Hugs, Marg
as i always say. people are to busy and really not paying attention to what's going on around them. keep a positive attitude and don't worry about everyone else. if they see what your doing and are fine with it they will accept you too. even if your not totally passable. if someone walks up to you they will probably tell you how good you look or just thank you for being yourself. it will get easier every time you leave the house dressed. just remember if you don't want anyone to know that you dress the best thing is not to be seen in your car. it's got a license plate and if anyone wanted to know who you are they could get it looked up. but that's probably slim and none. so don't let that stop you from being the woman you want to be.
That’s great Becca! Voice is my greatest Achilles heel; I’d be interested to hear how you learned to modify yours.
Joanna 💕
That is wonderful Becca. I admire how brave you are to explore your femininity. To interact with others as a woman is the ideal life many of us strive to achieve. While I have only minimally explored this aspect, examples like yours push me forward. Thank you
That cycle of confidence & reinforcement is very powerful once it takes hold of you. Pretty soon it will be second nature for you to be out en femme with the world seeing you as just another lady. It's a great sensation.
Becca -
What a lovely day out for you, glad you had that experience. I hope you have many more similar to that.
XOXO
Suzanne
Reading this topic and all the replies - it strikes me that I sincerely believe that most people are accepting of us if you try to do it right. Meaning, give it your best effort. I know if I encountered Becca or any number of you who blend in nicely, I would definitely treat you like the ladies you’re trying to be. And I believe that is true of most people in the human race.
Long long ago in the ‘80’s I went for lunch at a small, always crowded lunch counter. I knew there was no way I’d get a seat as the place is always packed with a waiting line. Yet that day I spied two empty stools at the counter, one on each side of a diner who was eating his lunch. As I walked in to go past him to get in line, I sensed something amiss. The guy in front of me says - “Did you get a load of the psycho wearing the dress?” As I focused in on him I could see the issue immediately. A long-haired, bearded, hairy legged guy wearing makeup, a dress, heels, nylons over unshaved hairy legs was sitting at the counter eating his lunch. People walked in, saw him and gave him a wide berth. Nobody confronted him, as he was looking around as he ate with a “You got a problem with me?” look on his face. He was ready for a confrontation if anyone had said anything. Which nobody did because, as I suspect, they didn’t want to trigger him. Ok dude, I thought, mission accomplished. You went out in public and had lunch and you don’t give a damn. Nobody cares.
What I’m trying to say by sharing this - is that this is what leads to my belief that most people will accept us out in public. It’s just a heckuva lot more enjoyable if you’re going to make a good attempt to blend in with society. If you look like you’re trying to make a statement or have some kind of agenda then people will do their best to avoid you as most people just don’t want any more conflict in their lives.
GP
Becca - I learned about French attitudes when I visited Saint Martin. Half of the island French, the other half Dutch. French shopkeepers: Rude, ignore you completely, especially Americans. You wondered why they were in business since it seemed they wanted none.
Dutch shopkeepers: Friendly, helpful, hustling to make a sale.
I remember when we left the island I told her we never need to come back to the French side. She agreed. That’s why you visit places, to meet different people.
The Netherlands obviously wants to make money. As did I when I ran a beauty salon. I had a sign on my front desk out of view of the customers: “Smile and say hello before the customer beats you to it.” I’ve never understood the “rude and indifferent” approach myself.
As for the Germans, they’d be right at home in California -because the customers there are mostly coming in to steal something🤣
GP