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Hi Ladies, so I recently just joined CDH and I am really excited to chat and get to know other ladies in this group. With that been said lets get into it. I have been an on and off CD for so many years, at least over 20. My journey start when I got into my sisters and mothers clothes, there was just something about it I enjoyed and loved. This on continued and then stopped when I started travel around the world. Then I met my wife and started settled down. The urge to dress again, my wife didn't know that i enjoyed CD and she didn't know for years until she found some underwear and clothes, so I needed to let her know, she was hesitant about the idea of her man been dressed as a women, I assured her that i wasn't planning on going out in public dressed like a female. So i got rid of any female items i had. So time went on and once again i got the urge and this time it was pretty intense. I ended up having multiple items of clothing and underwear and also close to 25 pairs of heels, I got pretty good at hiding everything from my wife. One day we were in the bath together and I let her know that i love to CD and that it would stay behind closed doors and that one else would find out about it, she some what accept it and we played around with the idea of me been dressed at home with her and she had a girlfriend to have fun with. So moving forward, I had an affair with a co-worker and she found out, we worked through that and she thinks a part of me being a CD caused me to look else where, when it wasn't. CDing is my escape from reality and helps calm me down because I become Tamara and not the man. It has it challenges to dress, but I am fortunate that I started a work from home job, so I went out and got business outfits and heels and I dress lady like when I am working. My wife does know that I dress now, but I just can't help but enjoy being dressed. I don't like that I am keeping this from my wife, but I just feel as if this is going have her spiral and really don't want to get rid of all my lady clothes. It's just hard and difficult to love being a CD and then also keep a balanced life. Thank you hearing me out and getting to the end of this.
You are not alone in your situation and it is difficult to negotiate. I expect that you'll find a lot of understanding here at CDH. We have all done a little "juggling with knives" with the CD inclinations and desires. Hang in there!
That is being very open and honest Tamara. Your wife sounds an amazing person as in both cases, affair and dressing she is still with you. On the face of what we know there may be an element of forgiveness from her but part of forgiveness is trust. Obviously I have no idea and can only think aloud to you, but if the marriage is something you value then if you make a promise to her are you sure you can keep it and maintain her trust in you. In a lot of cases dressing becomes consuming and the wish to move forward, such as going out be seen about is one. You are already dressing while working from home and storing your clothes away from your wife but what if she found out and realized that this was beyond what said before.
The thing I would say is do you really know where this is going and have a clear path in your mind? Only you know your wife and where you want to be and is honesty the best policy or hiding it away.
It is quite possible to have a balanced life but when you have a partner there may have to be boundaries to keep both sides content.
I say we all share the same boat there when mine find out I got a lot of negative talk like what you want to be a women or are you gay do want a man as time goes on them thoughts still never leave there mind but I must say the worst thing to do is hide it some how they eventually find out and that makes things worse best just to be open and honest hiding always seemed to end bad for me just my experience even today my SO don’t except or support but understands it a life style I dearly enjoy
Tamara it’s always been my experience that nothing good ever happens from keeping a secret from your spouse.
GP