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ever sit and wonder what or why we pushed are selfs to being a cross dresser all most here we all started at a young age not really knowing why as we got older are thoughts and feelings become overwhelming the urge the dress codes we choose but as I’m sitting here having a cold drink I started thinking more into this I soon started to realize that yea I always loved crossdressing but there was a mentor that pushed me to who I am today probably why I wear the clothes and heels today that I soon found out that I admire her and wanted to look just like her maybe some know her but her name is Aubrey Kate I absolutely loved her and adored her so I have to thank her for pushing me to who I am today so the question is if anyone like to share was there anyone in there life that pushed them to who they are today tC lady’s
@erinb Hey Erin, I had no inkling when I was young. Came to me in my early twenties. Then as most girls here know I had a hiatus of 35 odd years but the need to dress has come back in spades. I certainly had no mentor (and haven't heard of yours - I'll Google it), and like a lot of girls I can say I haven't got the foggiest idea why I am the way I am. It's a complete mystery why I have this need to indulge my feminine side. May as well just go with the flow.
Hugs, Chrissie xx.
@chrisfp99 completely understand I personally feel it also come with a lot of mixed emotions regardless of why glad your here indulging the mystery with all use 🤗
@erinb I didn't have any one individual who pushed me in any direction with dressing. like others, I have followed the lead of others who served as our pathfinders. If anything, I would have liked to have a "mom" who taught me everything I needed to know about being a girl (makeup, dressing, etc). Unfortunately, I have never had anyone like this in my life so I was left to my own devices. I like to think I got (am getting) there but there are always things to learn.
@lauren114 understand indeed I’m a closet dresser that no one knows my SO dose but no support or help so I understand the alone part but least we got CDH that we can all mentor off of and learn new things indeed
@erinb this is an interesting question, who is my mentor. I do have help from my wife in crossdressing and looking good as a lady so l am not sure l would call her my mentor , l really don't think l ever had one.
@candycross understandable also amazing to have a supportive SO that’s means a lot indeed
From my earliest memories, when I was three or four, I've known I should've been born a girl. I can't say I ever had a mentor or role model.
Absolutely there were some women that I admired. But I never felt that I needed to be like someone else.
I'm trans. I have girl brain. I live authentically. The clothes I wear, or lack thereof, have no bearing on how I feel about my self.
All that said, my dearest girlfriends were an important part of my journey. They created the safe spaces I needed to be myself. I'll be eternally grateful. You know who you are.
/LK
@lizk understand indeed
but it’s not wanted to be like someone else it’s about the inspiration a mentor has that drives one another further into this life style meaning for an example you started out wearing panties but then read and research others and want to follow a mentor that drives use maybe I’m crazy 🤷🏻 but at the end of your reply you stated your girlfriends where an important part of your journey so being said wouldn’t that be a mentor
Hmm. Mentor to me means someone that acts as an advisor or provides guidance for someone. In short, a teacher.
I don't see my dearest girlfriends that way. They gave me their friendship. They encouraged me to discover who I am. And they provided the safe spaces I needed to be myself. They are my sisters.
I'm trans. You don't learn to be trans. You just are. It's not a lifestyle.
Becoming your authentic self is a solitary endeavor. Nobody can show you how to do that. What they can do is provide the love, encouragement and sisterhood a girl needs to find her way.
THAT is what my dearest girlfriends did for me. The way I see it, that's more meaningful than learning what to wear or how to present in public. I love them dearly for their sisterhood.
I hope that makes sense.
/LK
@erinb So I was maybe 10 ish. I was raised by mostly women and a ausome grandfather Not sure if thats relevant but it is what it is 🙂 ..
If I have to think back to who would be my mentor. !!
I guess either Tina Louise , Or Barbera Eden. Tough to choose.. I think Tina was first..but they are the first girls to teach me what sexy was and probably what woke me up. I Think I envied the power they had over me.
If i had to guess thats what got it all started. and the rest is History!! 
Cheers RC
No CD individual... mentor... Just years and years of admiring others who "had been before me" that I wished to emulate. Bless me,l, I go back as far as buying hard copy magazines such as "World of Transvestism" out of the UK at a chain of one of "those" bookshops here in Oz... Of course they has some lovely ladies in those mags.... (Yes, I'm that ANCIENT and right now with a couple of pesky health complaints I feel like it..) Plus as a frustrated author, I even had a couple of articles printed That has never really left me,, see my articles here on CDH!!
"Male me" will always deeply indebted to two older men who mentored and trained me for what became a successful business career. EG I retired at 55 and have lived ""happily ever after".
Caty.
I can’t recall ever having a mentor Erin, but most of my inspiration to continue to dress as often as I do came from all my encounters here on CDH. I initially came here and figured that I’d stay for a little while, and never look as pretty as the girls I saw here, but through encouragement from friends here I kept at it, and am so glad I did. But the thing is that the desire was there for as long as I can remember.
@jennconn Jennifer, you are certainly as pretty as any of the girls here xx.
@jennconn first most seen many of your public pics and like Chrissie posted you are absolutely stunning but your first statement not havening a mentor sounds like CDH was yours and the lovely lady’s you meet threw here
@erinb thank you so much Erin, and of course as of a few days ago, you are my thigh high high heeled boots mentor,I just love yours, but I still couldn’t stand up in them.
@jennconn after a few moments in them it comes naturally lol took some getting use to
Good topic Erin. I don’t know that a lot of us had “mentors” in the traditional sense. Possibly we emulated a particular female in our life after being exposed to something strictly girly?
In my own case it was a female cousin showing me her nylons (pantyhose) as I sat next to her in a car. I said something to her along the lines of - your legs look really smooth. She replied - It’s because of these and pinched her thigh and pulled up the thin nylon to show me. Then she say - “And see, they go all the way up…!” Yes, I see😍. I instantly thought it was the coolest thing I’d EVER seen to that point.
Something I do remember from my early days as I started buying various female underwear garments I could “underdress” with - was thinking…this is kind of like being an addict. Only it’s not alcohol or drugs. Women’s clothing. Nothing harmful in any way. Just different and needs to be kept under wraps. My secret. My cool secret👩🦳.
I think that my early experiences lent a lot to my attitude of crossdressing today being “no big deal” and “we have a tendency to overthink this thing of ours”.
GP
@gracepal thanks for the reply understand I do have to check these nylons out tho I still haven’t today tried a pair
I've always envied people who had a mentor. Someone to provide some guidance in this complicated world, but not lecture. How many mistakes I could have avoided if someone could have talked to me with common sense. There were some people that I admired, but that is different from a mentor.
As for my cross dressing, no mentor. But as I came out, fortune provided me with a number of GG friends who accepted and encouraged me. Many were curious themselves and we learned from each other. Every time I am out with one I tell them how much they mean to me and that it's because of them that "Lisa" can fly.
@lisanicole thanks for the reply understand that’s truly an amazing reply indeed very touching to have that comfort and help
Since there is nobody in my life who could / would advise me*, CDH members have been my mentors. I have learned so much from you all, whether lifers or fresh out of the closet, young or old. So many of you started dressing late in life, so I pay particular attention to you and try to help when it is needed.
* Except for one female sales clerk in a Nordstrom that used to be near me. Until the whole chain of stores tucked its tail between its legs and abandoned the competitive Canadian market.
Vicky was very encouraging and personal, in the very short term while it lasted.
@harriette awww sorry to hear thanks for sharing and hopefully newer memebers read this to show that CDH is a wonderful site to be part of the help and support for all these lovey lady’s here is truly amazing and inspiring thanks for sharing
@erinb That's OK, I try to help others whenever I feel that my own experiences can make a difference to CDs looking for advice.
That's one of the advantages of on-line forums. We all get to meet so many diverse CDs here. Sharing is important if we want to help crossdressing grow and be accepted by society more.
A mentor....no, but I have found a lot of encouragement and inspiration from this site and discovering that it's not just me and that I'm not alone.
Hugs,
Anna xx
@annaredhead definitely a lot of support encouragement and inspiration here indeed definitely not alone here 🤗
