Need Advice Badly

Kaira first I am sorry to hear of your breakup. The most important thing to keep in mind is that if you develop any relationship “back in the closet” it will be based on deception. If you wish to be out and live as who you are don’t start out by changing who others think you are. I don’t know how open and out you wish to be but first and foremost instead of finding someone else find yourself. Whether you are straight, gay, tg, cd or any other type of person finding the right person is difficult enough without trying to be something or someone your not to find them. Spend some time becoming comfortable with you in all your aspects and self realizations before you try to find the right person. Make friends and develop your own life as you truly want to be. Once you know you and are living as YOU want then find the person that wants to be with you. I can’t tell you where to find that person when the time is right, but when you do they will know exactly who you are and love you for you, not who they think you are. Good luck and may 2019 be a wonderful year for you.

🍷C

Very well put Carolyne 🙂 . I cant really add much more. There may be a group or venue where you could meet up with like minded people, you may have to travel but it would be an outlet for you and if anything help you to regain your confidence. I hope that 2019, in spite of this, proves to be a happy year for you 🙂

Fiona xxx

As someone who is mostly out quite late in life, I would say be out whenever you feel like it and happy with yourself.

I am finding that a lot of people are more than ready to accept others who are interesting - there are people who are healthily curious but usually too polite to make one's appearance the talking point, who just come up to a man in a dress and start giving their life stories - like we're a special type of person that can be trusted.

Women seem particularly attracted to talk - so as a way of meeting women who like CDers, you cannot beat being who you are.

Keeping your CD self hidden is a recipe for a prison sentence, and discovery of the dwception is every bit as awful as you'd think.

I cannot guarantee you will find your true soul mate this or any other way - that just happens.

I met mine in a car park on her 18th birthday, while she was still at school and I was a 34 year-old public servant.

18 years later, we are still very happy together - which only goes to show...

Love

Laura

Hi Kaira. Let your SO go. That SO doesn't deserve you. I have gone through heartbreak several times and I have become a true loner, so maybe I am not the best to give advices on relationships. I always look for love and respect. Through suffering I have learned that you always have to live with yourself. It is important that you accept yourself the way you are. Others have to take you as you are.

There is no magic spell for happiness. The first step is to be confident in who you are and believe in yourself. If you find someone who wants to share your life, good. If you don't find that one, what the hell! That's what friends are for. There are plenty things to do in life. There is only one life. Your commitment is to live it the best you can.

Keep going strong, girl!

Gisela

Hi Kaira.....I am so sorry for you sweetie!  I am not quite sure what you are saying. Newly out straight dresser???? Do you cross dress all the time but want to find a new S/O who will accept you? Are you going "strait as a normal (forgive that word) male then going back to CD with her/him? I would love to assist you with this problem, but need to understand exactly what you are aiming at. I am here for you if you need assistance but do let me know about my questions first. Thank you...look forward to getting to know you better. Till then......

Dame Veronica

Kaira,Be true to yourself and go for it.Now,there is nobody to say no to you.Get comfortable in your fem self and you will develop as you need to.Enjoy your femininity.

I agree, let Kaira out. You may find someone that accepts you as you are.

Be true to who you are. It may seem dark now in the end you will see a brighter ending.

We've all struggled with this and you are not alone. It is healthy to question, to wonder, to keep a mindset positive. When you are ready, you will take it on, be confident, and believe in yourself!

Xoxo

-s

my advice is to take it slowly.  No rush.  From what you say it sounds as though you are looking for a genetic woman so try the internet sites,  friends of friends, the usual dating "out there" stuff.  I might even reccomend the bars, but i gave up alcohol 8 years ago.

Whilt it is hard to work it into a conversation i would mention to any date by the second meeting that you are a cross dresser.  At least that will screen out the screamers, and set the stage for honesty?

But be patient,  I am at a stage wondering why my previous relationships, at least 6 of them, and two divorces, one at the final paper work stage, did not work and that is the question I will take to a new therapist tomorrow.

Right now a so so wonderful partner has been away for two weeks and i am in the middle of changing back to jim from Jen,  its been a great two weeks, a fair number of adventures, and some struggle as i shed my female persona.

so taking my own advice, lets both practice patience and accept my6 concerns over the loss of your significant other,  Just wish her well.  Life is too short to get mired in anger or sadness.  Thats advice I need to learn. so thanks for asking

jen

HI Kaira,

You should not be looking for a replacement so quickly.   You need to look into yourself and deal with the mistakes that you might have made.  Why did she leave in the first place?  Was it because you are a crossdresser or was it something else.  Take your time and do not rush into another relationship right away.  Take care of your own Garbage first.

Love

Vicki  E.

Hi Kaira, I wouldn't go back into the closet, you have a chance to let yourself be free and enjoy the time being you! So grab it with both hands! There are plenty more people out there who will accept and want to be with you you've just got to keep searching for that right person! You may find someone straight away or it might take a little while but you will find that special someone eventually hunny :).

Samantha x

Hi Kaira,

What others are saying, take it slow, take the opportunity to really branch out and find yourself, invest in yourself.

This is a great opportunity, for you!

Sweetie,

I know right now your probably feeling very alone and you'll want to reach out for someone to ease the pain and loss your feeling right now. However, this is the worst time to get involved again. When we get involved in the "rebound" we tend to develops relationships for all the wrong reasons. Take this time to do some soul searching and explore more you more deeply and why you enjoy crossdressing. When the time is right, you will meet someone and then I would advise you to be honest and tell them about Kaira before the relationship gets too serious.

Best of Luck, Hugs Brenda

I can't thank you ladies enough for the support and advice! :-* For those of you worried, I'm not looking to jump into something soon, I just wanted to bounce the idea off the community for whenever I do/don't decide to get back in the game. You have no idea how much I appreciate your support right now. Lots of Love, Kai.