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After cross-dressing for years and finding relief but not joy, a few months ago I acknowledged to myself that I am a trans woman. It has made a huge difference for me.
Now today, on this beautiful Sunday morning, I was up, still in my long lace nightgown, pantyhose, and my first-time painted nails, and relaxing with my coffee in a clean kitchen. "It is such a pleasant day!", I thought. And then, "I think I'd like to starting going back to church...."
I thought, "What is going ON with me?! 'It is such a pleasant day?' Huh? Dani, what is THAT all about with you, dear?!" Yes, I finally have, after a 4-year covid-induced hiatus, the notion that I think I want to go to church.
This community - CDH - has made an incredible difference in my life, with the support and many friends who understand me, who never condemn or criticize.
I can see that I am really going through some significant psychological growth in the last few months: Restoration of my wardrobe, adding lipstick, doing my face every morning, daily practice with makeup, and breaking myself in to pantyhose 100% of the time. Bra & forms as much as possible. For male mode, if going out in public, ok- just guy pants, shoes, and limiting myself to foundation & makeup.
I am now ready in my life to start looking for accepting churches, in the hopeful expectation that by the time I find one locally, I will have grown as a woman enough to attend church full dressed.
I wonder how it will go?
@danikiss22 This is WAY out there on my horizon, too. That said, my observation is that the Methodist denomination is riding the crest of the trans wave-you might try them first... but, as Orchard said, most all churches seem to have become more open to trans of late...
@danikiss22 Hi, Dani. I hope you find your journey in your CD/trans life as comfortable as possible.
I can only speak for myself, I converted to Catholic 37 years ago just before my oldest was born. I did so because my wife was Catholic and I wanted to present a united parental front.
It was about 5 and a half years ago that Iof years years needed started getting back into CD and realized quickly that I wasn't going back.
Over the next couple years I added a little more to my presentation longer hair, pierced ears, long painted nails. ALL THE WHILE GOING TO CHURCH ALMOST EVERY SUNDAY.
About 2 years ago I started wearing ONLY women's clothes to church. Usually black pants, black blazer, black flats and a neutral silky top.
About one year ago I started going fully asIbeen mhave Cassie. Usually wearing awe dress, bra, forms and makeup.
My Church is a small rural Catholic Church. So far I have only met tolerance and acceptance. BUT as we all know that can change.
Dani, best on your journey.
Cassie
@loneleycd Thank you dear Cassie. I love your story and you are an inspiration to me. I so desperately feel the germinating seed trying to break into the sunshine.
Being trans has become more accepted by different congregations and denominations, so you might be able to find that religious fellowship you want without having to sacrifice your identity. God knows all about you anyway, so why hide it? If you can't find anything where you are at, I'm sure you can find a church online. Just do your research until you've found the right one. You'll find your path. I wish you well.
Thanks Dani for starting this interesting topic! It leaves me wondering how nice it would be to bring together my faith and sense of fashion. I've often thought of these as divided but perhaps there's an opportunity here for growth. I wish you nothing but the best on this journey. And will keep you in mind as the brave woman you are.
- Katie
I have fallen away from the church I grew up in but I still believe myself to be a spiritual person. From time to time, I have felt the desire to go back to church but I have not acted on this feeling. I am fairly certain that the church I grew up in would not be accepting at all. I have found a church in my neighborhood that advertises itself as being open and has adopted a covenant (about 5 years ago) which includes people of all gender identities and expressions. Should I decide to go back to church, this is where I will go. I'm wondering if other people like me are attending already and if so, it might be a nice way to expand my own community.
@lauren114 If I believe in God, and I think I am his child, then there shouldn't be any reason on my part not to worship. I mean, am I sinning by being transgender? Should I put myself outside the camp like a leper? I just don't see my identity as being lascivious in any way. There's nothing erotic about it. I've accepted in the last 6 months that I really am a trans woman. This week I prayed about it. "Lord are you ok with me?"
True - many churches can't handle it... But how am I a rebellion against God, especially to what is commanded in the New Testament? I think the more primary consideration if I were to attend 'en femme' is what St. Paul talked about with eating traditionally unclean foods - that we refrain not because it's wrong, but because spiritually young believers can't handle it. So yeah, its wiser to steer towards LGBTQ churches then.
Dani
Hi Dani,
The church I attended while I was growing up was a lot less tolerant than the one that exists today. But even though it's tolerance has softened, many of its members still cling to the tired old dogma that led me to leave it years ago. I think you are wise to search for a church that is accepting in it's outlook.
I too know of a church in my area that is welcoming of all identities, and if I ever decide to go back; that is where I will go.
There is a huge difference between religion and spirituality, however; and for me, I do not necessarily need a church to commune with my higher power.
But, I can see a lot of positives going to a church and being surrounded by persons who can relate to me and I to them.
Good luck in your search!!
Hugs,
Jennifer
There certainly are tolerant churches out there. I was raised Methodist and left the church I grew up in due to growing anti-LGBT comments from our pastor. Fast forward 10 years and that same church broke from the Methodist council and started actively seeking out LGBT members.
I'm sure you can find a place that will respect both your faith and your true self.
