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My wife is in Sweden until Thursday. I dropped her off at the airport (Heathrow, 3 hours from home) on Sunday after noon.
My wife is wonderful, and I have more or less a free rein to do as I please. One of the exceptions is nails. I'm not allowed painted or false nails.
My wife is away for 4 days. I have two packets of pre-painted nails, both the same to allow for loss. It's always handy to have spares. I planned on wearing nails whilst I can.
Sunday evening As I'm getting ready for bed, I sit and file my nails in preparation for Monday morning. Various health issues mean my nails have ridges. I file the ridges down to allow decent adhesion of the nails.
Monday morning I wake. Before I shower and get ready, I put on drab clothes and go down and feed our dog, I make a pot of tea, have a small breakfast. I then go and shower and shave.
Back into drab!
The urge/need/desire to dress left me. I spent the day in drab mode.
Tuesday.... Drab mode.
Wednesday (today). I repeat Monday. Feed the dog, tea, breakfast, shower and shave..... I had to force myself to get into Cerys mode. I literally had to talk myself into it. I did my hair (It's a new style, and I love it, it curls up at the bottom. It really does make me happy), but apart from lipstick, I didn't do my face.
Needless to say no nails! I've had 3 days, no nails. Hardly any Cerys. Nails take me so long to put on, and even longer to take off that today, I didn't bother.
I'm wondering if its the going down to sort the dog out that has caused my apathy? Normally my wife does the dog and makes the tea whilst I'm creating Cerys.
Now I'm in Cerys mode, I'm happy that I made the half arsed effort, but I could so easily have just reverted to drab mode.
Isn't it weird how sometimes the urge just goes away? I often go weeks or months as Cerys. When I have the chance to go that little bit further than normal, the urge leaves me!
It's times like this that drive home that whilst I live as Cerys for 80+% of my time, I am still a crossdresser, and not trans. I'm about to take the dog for his walk. It will be the first time I have been out of the house as Cerys since Saturday!
Cerys
Isn't it weird how sometimes the urge just goes away?
It is indeed, Cerys. I find it weird that, when I can't be bothered, I feel like I'm cheating myself out of enjoyment! Go figure 🙄.
As I age, the urge changes. I spend less day time dressed, but went the urge comes, it is so much stronger than it used to be. It literally cannot be resisted. 🥰🤗
Hi Cerys. It is strange!
Although my circumstances are a bit different to yours, sometimes I find that the more time I have to dress, the less the urge. Prior to Covid, I would often have 5 days a week where I could dress, but would only dress for maybe 2 or 3. The urge just wasn't there for the full 5 days.
These days, I typically get 1 or 2 days a week and use them to the full.
Have had the odd occasion since Covid where I have had 3 or 4 days to myself but only dressed for maybe 2.
Maybe less is more?
Judy. X.
Hi Cerys,
I've not dressed since i had my makeover in December, it's not that I've not wanted to I've not actually had the chance to, if my wife went away for a few days then i would be dressed all the time she is away,
Love Roz ❤️
I'm with you not dressed since November when my living situation meant that I could have a long weekend as Lizzy. But I do find my urge to dress waxes and wanes probably because I have other hobbies such as running which have proved to be a welcome distraction.
I can dress as I please but haven't gone out as Becca since my operation at the end of December...until today, that is. I could have gone out before now but, like Cerys, sometimes it's just too much trouble. Today was different though, I had a reason to go into the city, wifey wasn't bothered about going, so I dressed, fully, and went out for the day, on my own; I had a very pleasant time. As I hadn't been out for a while, the initial nervousness was there, but once I'd set foot outside the door and got into my car, everything cleared up and I was happy to be Becca again. As usual, I didn't want to go back to drab until the very end of the day but, again like Cerys, the dog has to go out...and the dog always comes first in our family.
I don't feel any compulsion to dress, I don't get 'the urge', it's just something I like to do now and again, when I can be bothered. I think part-time dressing is the right way for me but for others, it can never be enough.
Becca
Cerys -
I don't find this unusual. I've had my wife invite Suzanne for a visit and decline her offer. I think it is the mood I'm in at the time that causes me to do that. Conversely I do spend my mornings dressed in some manner - it could be a nightie, dress or skirt/blouse combo. I'll wear lipstick, necklace, bracelet and earrings (which I wear 24/7 - when I dress in the morning I'll change to dangling ones I don't wear out of the house). I don't have sufficient time to put on full make up and a wig but enjoy the time I have.
XOXO
Suzanne
Hi Cerys
It looks like I will be having a three week break from Joanna-time, but that’s more down to circumstances and lack of time. I do still feel connected though, as I’m often in a skirt and tights at home, even if there isn’t the time to get fully en-femme.
Hope you get your mojo back! Joanna 💕