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Thank you all so much for the wonderful comments on my public pictures! You know how to make a girl feel special. Unfortunately, I took them all down this morning. I was experimenting this morning and was able to EASILY find those pics on a simple Google search. I cannot afford to have some outsider copying my pics and letting them out to the world. I knew there was a chance that they could be out there, but i didn’t know it would be so easy. I have all my pics in private photos now and set them to friends only. I recently got a sexual comment on one of my private pics because I had it set to “logged in users”. Well, this “user” had no bio info and had just joined 2 hours prior. CDH took care of them pretty quickly, but it opened my eyes to the vulnerability that still exists even inside the walls of CDH. For me, I can’t have these pics out there on the web. So, what I’m saying is, I’m still here…I’m just not so public anymore.
Love you all!
Danni
Thanks for sharing and the reminder about checking things out! Sorry you had the extra stress 
@felicianrb I just typed in “crossdresser photos” and boom, there it was for the whole world to see. CDH comes up as the 2nd or 3rd hit. I guess my photos were pretty new, so they popped right up. I’m just overly paranoid. I’m not sure anybody would recognize me or not, but I can’t take that chance. I wish there was a way to share pics with trusted members, and not have them go out to the world. I guess I just need to increase my friends list so I can share with you all.
If you don't want everyone to know this about you, then you're not paranoid. I hemmed back and forth about simply joining (or ordering from CD/TG friendly places) because I worry about hacking.
Obviously, the desire to continue my journey grew larger than the fear. Doesn't mean we should give up our concerns though!
@gracepal for the private gallery there is a drop down when creating the gallery and on each photo. It defaults to “logged in users only” but you can also choose “friends only”
@dannydior301 Thank you so much Danni. Was not aware of this until your post today. You’re right about public exposure, there’s a lot of it coming from CDH. Easy to find in public searches too. I’d prefer “friends only” viewing my PP’s as there are many fly-by-nighters that come and go on CDH. I will be much more careful with private galleries going forward.🥰 As for public photos I had the thought of posting there for about a minute.🤣
The Hazzards of our enfem 'Hobby '
Understanding and unfortunately trolls and unsavory characters look to pray upon us. Shoving many of us back into the deepest recesses of our closests!
Do what you must for your comfort and safety. I'm glad that you will have at least some presence here. Staying plugged in here helps to keep from feeling alone and isolated.
Wishing you all the best, Danni!
Fran 🥰
@dannydior301 your photos were beautiful but I do understand why you did what you did. For the same reason, I haven't posted a photo with my face publicly. I don't want to risk it plus I haven't mastered makeup or had a professional makeover (yet).
Glad you have decided to stick around!
An understandable position. Do what it takes to make yourself comfortable.
Miss Dani, Well I did like your pics, but 1000% understand why you took them down. I too have found pics of me posted at various (unintended) places on the net. Privacy is a thing of the past, and artificial intelligence will make it worse.
I have just one pic of me here (headless) and no longer post pics of me anywhere.
I just cherish the small bit of privacy still available.
Have fun, and your pics are very pretty.
Staci.
@sf it’s a shame, because sharing photos of all our hard work and successes is part of the joys of this whole thing. If you can’t attend public outings, photos are the next best thing. Sure wish this world was different. I felt so much joy sharing those.
@sf sent you a friend request so I can keep you updated on my new looks! Thanks for the compliments!
Hi Danni,
Your search must have been a shock! It’s a pity if you were having so much fun sharing them. I’m no expert but, it’s my understanding that if you post to your private gallery the pictures can only be seen by CDH members and they shouldn’t come up on a google search. Hopefully somebody can verify that.
Kate
I’m so sad Danni, you had such beautiful photos too. I’m certain that nobody would ever recognize me, unless they were really looking and then I’m certain that they would be one of us, but I’m glad you are doing what’s best for you. I’m also thankful that the volunteer ladies here do such a fantastic job at getting predators and trolls off of this site. I actually had one that I didn’t report and should have, but they were gone before I did.
@jennconn Next time I am with a group, I need to pull out my driver’s license and see if anyone thinks Danni looks like me. I think I could be figured out pretty quickly.
The chances of somebody looking at a random photo and recognizing somebody en femm is pretty slim. One needs some context to pit faces together, and a wig, make up and a dress is enough to remove thay context. Just think how easy it is for celbraties to wear a hat and sunglasses and go oit in public. Seeing a random photo of somebody en femme and recognizing that person is pretty slim. But, on the otherhand, if someone put a few "normal" photos of a person into a facial recognition app, wn femme photos are fairly likely to pop up, and now that context is present.
It might depend on just how many photos of a person are out tjere on the web, buy as an example, I have very few pictures out there, buy when I used a FR app my en femme photos popped up instantly, even old ones long since deleted. Therein lies the big worry. If say, I put in pictures of a friend, and an en femme photo of thay friend pop up, I will easily recognize him even with hair and make up.
As has been said many times, once on the internet, always on the internet. I don't know how often webcrawlers scan the internet, but I suspect it is pretty much constant these days, so even brief appearnces of picrures and information if captured.
@jjandme I routinely drop a picture or 2 of Danni into reverse Google image search and get no results. Heck, my iPhone doesn’t even open up when I’m en femme, so I am probably ok for sure. A life of hiding has probably left me over-cautious for sure. There are times I wish it would just happen and I could get it over with. Get that damn monkey off my back and start living properly. Unfortunately, the risks are too high right now.
@dannydior301 If one is still in the work world, or a highly visible social group of friends, what is the value proposition of being outed? I can’t imagine one single thing. I can imagine PLENTY of downsides though. Even for a retired lady like myself. My pictures are “friends only” starting today. I always wondered why making official friends on CDH was worth the bother - when we could all see and talk to each other whether we were friends or not. Now I know. Another new discovery after only 9 months here🙃. And it’s a good thing too, as it’s pretty easy to spot the regulars here in the dollhouse 🥰.
A good friend of mine who’s single has a policy of 90 days of exposure to any new romantic interest before anything physical happens. I sorta use that now as my guide here on CDH. If you’ve hung around on here for at least three months and managed to insert some intelligent comments in the community here and there - then friendship is possible. As another girlfriend of mine here on CDH told me: I didn’t join CDH to “collect friends”. I’m with her, me neither. You only need a few good ones.🥰
I’ve been on here for 9 months and already have seen what I thought were some dedicated players suddenly up and vanish without a trace. I chalk most of it up to the comings and goings of our little hobby. And I do make allowances for it. Circumstances can change suddenly. Purges are ongoing and to be expected at times. But for me, an excess of caution makes me more comfortable in my crossdressing pursuits. There’s nothing wrong with a little overthinking when it comes to all of this. I interact and communicate with my all my real world friends. If we’re not going to have any of that here in girly world as well, then we don’t have to be friends. Let’s be careful out there girlfriends!
GP
@gracepal love this comment. All so true and exactly on point with my thoughts. Nobody here should be offended if we don’t immediately accept a friendship request with no photo, no profile and no comments. Take your time and settle in, we’ll get to know you and then we can let you behind the curtain. I know I was VERY much in the background for the first month or two. Then the phases of the moon or the alignment of the planets, or whatever controls me, had me back dancing in the pink fog.
Right now I’m Miss Active and I can’t stop posting. I just tried the chat room for the first time in the last few days. That’s fun too! I’m sure I will phase out again in the future during a regularly scheduled “social purge” (I stopped purging my clothes awhile back). And to be honest, you will probably see public photos get posted again at some time. I’m so inconsistent with my convictions! I go from “Oh my God! That looks just like me!! Everybody will know!!” to “Nobody will ever find these and they don’t even look like me”.
That’s the curse of this glorious part of me. At 52, I have at least recognized the ups and downs and I know what to expect. Can’t explain any of it, but I do know how to ride it out.
I think that has become my “Matriarchal Mission” on CDH. I am hoping some of the younger ladies (and older too) read my rantings, see the pure joy in my smile and find some guidance and assistance while they are here. I wish I had the clarity and self-acceptance at 20 that I have now. Life would have been so much easier and FUN!
Love to all,
Danni
@dannydior301 Well, you’re a smarter girl than I was when I first joined Danni. I just figured WTH, accept all friends since I’m new here and it doesn’t really matter as we can all see and contact each other anytime. I can be a bit slow to catch on at times. The main thing I observed when “friending” some girls on here is that it’s the first and last time you ever hear from them for the most part. I go back from time to time and thin them out if I haven’t had any exchanges with them in awhile. And as you say - It’s nothing personal. We don’t know each other in the first place and most likely will never meet - so how could it be? I had to remind myself of why I participate in zero social media other than CDH. I don’t have time for it and it gets me in trouble with people I don’t care about to begin with. Life’s too short.
Posting. Both pics and forum comments are my fave things to do here on CDH. I like a stimulating topic that gets my brain working for the most part. But then sometimes I like panty or bra topics as well, as we girls sometimes like to talk about frivolous things🥰.
As far as posting pictures I’m quite happy now that I know about the “Friends Only” setting on private pictures. I’m sure I’ll post more pictures now as I can’t get enough of myself. Like you, there’s times when I think no one will ever recognize me. Angela Wagner told me in KS that she never would have…(of course she had just met me the day before too) Other times I default to the attitude of nobody cares or nobody’s worried about it other than me. But I do have family and friends to think about so I try to keep things private around here as much as possible. I only recently noticed that I could save anyone’s “private photos” to my personal photos easily. (Wouldn’t you like to know whose pics I tried that with ladies?🤣) Something else I think about is that if I were out there and my inner circles knew about it and didn’t care a whit and it changed nothing….well, then some of the specialness and secretiveness that I enjoy about it would be gone. I want to preserve Grace as an alter ego that only a chose few know about. Which of course does include many of my sorority sisters here on CDH.
Your last paragraph sums it up well. I see the pure joy in your smile and I hope girls can see it in mine. Crossdressing makes me smile from ear to ear every time. It’s a guaranteed good time. Everything about it is just all good stuff!
Hey Danni. Perfectly reasonable. We all do what we have to do. But have you received a glut of friend requests since putting up your post 😂? xx.
@dannydior301 Indeed, so you should really find out what www. is, I hope this helps
After reading the above, I have to ask if there is a reason why our photos have to be public at all? Couldn't they be by default private, but with the option to be either a) public b)private c)CDH members only e) friends only.
That way we have a choice, and there would only have to be one gallery instead of two.
@sienna106 Photos can be public or private on a photo by photo basis. You decide to which "gallery" to upload the photos.
Private photos can be CDH members only or friends only, but on a user basis, not a photo by photo (or subgallery) basis. As Danni pointed out, if it's a CDH member only basis, anyone can join CDH, look around for photos, even download them, and never post anything. They may not always be members of our community. If they send an inappropriate message then you know they're there, but if they remain silent they can go around and view photos open to all CDH members.
@sienna106 @chrisfp99 @gracepal
The software that runs our site doesn't support this functionality. And the complexity of coding a custom software module is probably not feasible. However, it may be possible to change the default on private photos to 'friends only'. I will see if that can be done.
Liz
Another thought is that when I post pics in a private gallery they also appear on my wall. Which anyone can see. I’m guessing these pics on the wall will not be visible to “non-friends” as well?
I totally understand Danni.. that right there is why I choose to not show my face on here
Hi Danni.
I can fully understand your stance on this.
Having very recently had a photo shoot, I have been toying with the idea of posting some of the photos on CDH, but my ongoing privacy paranoia has won the day.
To be honest, I surprised myself by actually going ahead with the photo shoot, but at least I am happy with the privacy arrangements with the photographer.
My current life circumstances dictate that my privacy is paramount. Should that change things might be different.
Judy.
@judevderl I would LOVE to have the guts to do a photo shoot. I think it would be a blast and then I would have some good quality pics. I still haven’t figured out a good home setup for DIY photo shoot.
@dannydior301 Danni, the phrase photo shoot covers all sorts of scenarios. And perhaps differs from makeover. I have almost no opportunity to be Chrissie but I've had two makeovers, and a third coming up in a couple of weeks. It's just the most exquisite experience. I'll be beautifully made up, be given access to a selection of hundreds of outfits, nails, wigs, heels, the lot. I'm getting quite excited. Then I'll pose for hundreds of pics.
I'm the least ladylike bloke here, but they'll encourage me into so many girly poses, and send all the pics to me, some of which will be edited to remove unwanted hair etc (I'm not in a position to shave).
The first time I went, I nearly turned the car round and went home. This time I will just flounce in in a girly whirl, anticipating the magic to come. Of course you'd have the guts. There will be many outlets in the States that provide this sort of service. You can probably find them on this site.
Go for it girl. You won't regret it. Oh, and for better or worse I'll post some of the pics in my public photos.
Big hugs Danni, Chrissie xx.
@chrisfp99 I would absolutely love that! Sounds so fun! Yes, share pics for sure!!!
"For better or worse" indeed! We've seen your pics, Chrissie, there ain't no "worse" about them, you look amazing, girl.
I hope/know you'll have a great time, no-one deserves it more.
@dannydior301 Hi Danni. Definitely go for it! Having now taken that leap, I'm now looking forward to the next one. As Chrissie said, photo shoots come in many forms. Mine was a little different to Chrissie's. The thing is, you can shop around, do your research and find what works for you. You won't regret it!
I deleted all my photos as there was quite a risk to me of being recognised.
@annaredhead I was wondering what was going on with you AR. Funny thing is that I was on another site recently, saw quite a lot of pics of a classy looking girl and then it hit me: That looks a LOT like Anna Redhead. Gorgeous pics they were too, but unlike anything you ever posted here. It led me to wonder if they were unauthorized - because around the time I stumbled across them your pics from here were gone. They may not even be you but if not they’re certainly a very close resemblance.
@gracepal As far as I know, there is only one other site which has photos that show my face (my name and location is not published on it) there are a few others which don't show my face but show legs or outfit with face away from the camera
@gracepal I did a shoot in a green dress, but don't have any brown boots, so I assume it's not me.
I would imagine somebody would really have to know what they were looking for. In order to put it together. While not impossible, i suppose, just unlikely.
The problem is facial recognition software. Whike I agree it would be hard to put together random photos, with FR software it is quiye easy to unexpectently find such photos. Say you are looking for a friend and have a couple of facebook photos and put them into a GR app, and two seconds later you get a bunch of results from various social media sites, a couple of which happen to be photos en femme. It is easy to see the similarity when posyed side by side. Of course GR apps are not perfect and will give false results, i.e. there maybe people who look similar, buy overall, the results are scarry acurate. I have few photos out on the web, but when I tried it on myself, a couple of me from here popped up, as well as a group photo somebody posted on Facebook from a school reunion. Now I don't know if it is possible (yet) but what if somebody put the group photo into a FR app to see what everybody looked like these days, they just might be surprised at how I look.
@jjandme agreed. For every good thing technology does for us, there is at least 1 associated bad thing. AI can tweak that photo to make you look oh so perfect, but it will also dime you out in a deep internet search. We were never 100% safe, and we are now even less safe from exposure. That’s what makes us such beautiful and brave femme goddesses! Despite the risks, you can always depend on us to be there in our heels, dresses, makeup and wigs! We are the mighty crossdressers!! 🤪
I don't know about online face recognition, but my iPhone face unlock doesn't recognise me with makeup on.
Allie x
I would also encourage anyone to do a photoshoot. It is very fun, and while a bit nerve wracking at first, that soon disappears and just becomes fun. I have one coming up in a few days and can hardly wait.
While we would all love to see others' photos we understand privacy concerns, but just having your own stash of elegant photos even if no one but you sees them is still special.
...and you never know. My wife had a boudoir session awhile ago and was suoer nervous, but ended up having the time of her life, and I was very surprised how proud she was of the results, and how many people she showed her album to. You never know...
@jjandme Hear hear JJ. I have another makeover booked in a couple of weeks and can't wait. Rightly or wrongly I don't have a problem putting the pics in my public photos. Would love to see some of yours. Hope you have a ball girl xx.
Thanks, I know I I will.
This past week one of my employees was found out by another employee through FB and was running around showing everyone.
As the manager I had to address it and put a halt to it. It’s sad that some people can’t mind their own business and have to gossip.
This past week one of my employees was found out by another employee through FB and was running around showing everyone.
As the manager I had to address it and put a halt to it. It’s sad that some people can’t mind their own business and have to gossip.
What on Earth are they doing putting such pictures on Facebook, of all places?! FB's privacy settings are obscure, at best. When I was on it, years ago, I had to constantly check what settings they had changed without telling me and in the end, I binned the whole affair and never go near it now.
@rebeccabaxter even on CDH you have to be very careful. I was surprised when I learned “public photos” was not just public to the website, but the entire internet. A little naive I guess, but I assumed certain protections existed. You know what they say about assuming…
@shawndyglitterfiend that’s such a shame. Crossdressing is such a mild, “victimless” activity but it just seems it will never lose the label of “taboo”. In the end, who should really care if you like to feel pretty? Certainly no need to criticize and demean. I think that’s the main reason I obsess over mastering a “perfect” look. They can make fun of me, but they can’t say I don’t do a good job!
