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[Closed] Saturday morning reflections and shopping for women's shirts

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Posts: 57
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(@Anonymous 94392)
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Joined: 1 year ago

Hopefully its ok to post (with some edits) a topic I tried over on TGH since I'm looking for suggestions...

I wanted to express my contentment and happiness for how far I've come in the last month towards accepting that I am a woman, after making a decision this past autumn to stop resisting "it."

This morning I woke up in a beautiful yellow floral nightgown.  Got up, made coffee, and enjoyed my quiet time soaking up the female vibes I'm now allowing myself to absorb.  A little later I stepped into the shower, shaved some stubby legs, then a pat dry.  After dressing in my pre-selected bra, panties, and pantyhose, I was thrilled this morning to finally have a skirt to wear.  And it fits perfectly.  As do new white flats.  I picked out an existing mens shirt in a matching color, and then I was ready for housework.  (Which is now finished).

I have questions.  I don't think I am most accurately only a crossdresser.  Maybe, ok, I love panties and stockings.  But it's also like... relief.  Relief to live, as I can, alone, as a woman. To have, I think (or I guess) the emotions and the desires of a woman.  I love that I can wear a flattering bra all day, every day.  It's like a need.  It seems from what I've read, that CD's are most commonly wanting to wear for a little while, or 1-2 times a week, etc., and then they are fine.  They go back to their hunting, or tire repair, or other masculine pursuits.  I'm not like that.

If I didn't have kids and who are now living lives of their own, it would be different.  My woman-ness, my situation in life - it has germinated and blossomed after they already had come along and, I think for me, to ask for or expect their acceptance, maybe there is only so far I can go towards my dream.  

But back to my shirt for today. I have to at least pretend I'm a man when I'm out. I'm constrained by my location in a small-town, the kids, etc.  But I want to find women's shirts.   It can be just a long-sleeve Oxford button-down.  I don't want to wear a man's.  So the challenge is in the sleeve length, and so far I've only found one brand, Land's End ($54) that comes in like, a 16T (Tall) for example.  I think I need to not just accept the guidelines for how female vs male sleeve length is determined.  I can't believe than with me, the sleeve length is 34, and all the women's shirts are 22, 23, 24 inches.

Well, thank you to all for letting me share.

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6 Replies
Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 2 years ago

Illustrious Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 4018

@gina2923 I have some of your same issues, in style, at home, finding shirts that fit, etc., although finding a 34" sleeve might be difficult even in men's shirts here. Wow.

Guest
(@Anonymous 94392)
Joined: 1 year ago

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Posts: 57

@harriette That's why I'm unsure about how they measure.  16 1/2 - 34 is common, but then you think, is one's arm from the shoulder to the wrist really 3 feet long?  One yard was the distance from the King of England's nose to the end of his hand, wasn't it?  And that included the length of his hand. I think maybe women measure the arm 'fairly straight,' whereas men's must be measure from near the shoulder socket then down the outside, then a right angle, then to the wrist.  Anyway, I just order a passable woman's oxford shirt from Amazon and I will see what happens.

Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 2 years ago

Illustrious Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 4018

@gina2923 Ah, OK, I understand better now.

This is why I do most of my shopping in stores, now. Whip out my tape measure & notes, measure the waist, sleeve or inseam and it either passes that test or it stays on their shelf. If I really, really have to, I might use their fitting room, but I don't find that to be necessary very often. Shoes are the same. Try them on and they either fit or they don't, hurt or they don't.

Unless an on-line item has enough information with it to make a safe purchase, I don't click complete order. Most of my underwear I buy on-line because there usually is enough details to get away with doing that. Otherwise...?

Duchess
(@loneleycd)
Joined: 5 years ago

Famed Member     Roland, Iowa, United States of America
Posts: 2157

@gina2923 Hi, Gina.  I might also suggest Torrid.  Many of their tops look like men's shirts, but the fabrics are so soft.  Some have similar colors as men's, even if the cut is much more feminine.  Before I came out fully fem 90% of the time I wore some of these tops when  in male  mode.  Torrid clothes are cut for larger size women, so they tend to fit the male body better than some others.

   Cassie

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(@Anonymous 94392)
Joined: 1 year ago

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Posts: 57

@loneleycd Thanks for the tip.  I've gotten some good help from my sisters here, and am also pleasantly surprised at how many full sisters I have.  I thought maybe I was in the minority, being trans, (maybe I actually am) but I'm loving it here being able to talk so openly as a woman.

Guest
(@Anonymous 94392)
Joined: 1 year ago

Trusted Member
Posts: 57

An update on women's shirts.  I recieved my order today and need to return due to being too tight around the middle.  But the sleeve length is perfect, and their size chart shows the bust measurement increases by five inches for the next size up.  I will try to get the nerve and do my first pic for you when I get the correct size, as well as other details for those who like me want to wear everyday women's clothes as we go about our lives, even it is just button-down shirts and slacks.

Posts: 3446
Hostess
(@ab123)
Illustrious Member     Surrey, United Kingdom
Joined: 5 years ago

I believe that once you have passed the 'autumn' moment it begins the next process of conundrums as to how to achieve the dream.It is multi faceted and quite confusing at times. You have quite a lot rattling around your head and I found that the way to do it was to put everything into 'boxes' and rate them in importance. You are in a the first phase of working out suitable clothing, that is box one. Then perhaps the next is working on your style and then it is for you to work through your thoughts and ambitions and place them in 'boxes' and mark according to a workable sequence of importance to complete the aims, you could add some kind of timeline of course. You can add and change the sequence but at least you have noted each thought so it isn't forgotten.

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Guest
(@Anonymous 94392)
Joined: 1 year ago

Trusted Member
Posts: 57

@ab123. Thank you for your support and advice.  I will 'take it to heart.'    Suitable clothing and style - I want to look good for someone my age.  As they say, a handsome woman.  The timeline you mentioned, I think I can just go with what is in my budget.  So each month I have a set amount which, ok, clothes aren't as big a priority as a mortgage payment or utilities, but still, it is time for me to be complete.

So tonight I tried out a new nightgown.  100% white lace.  100%.  Long sleeves, ankle length.  Like a bridal gown, only 100% sheer.  If I were not a woman in my soul, I could not be as thrilled as I am with how I look, and how it looks on me.  Wow.  Something clicks inside me.  I can't believe it.

I went ahead and ordered one shirt from Amazon to see how it goes.

Posts: 7835
(@aliceunderwire)
Illustrious Member     Near Burlington, Vermont, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Hi Gina,

Have you tried Lane Bryant. They carry tall’s and have tops/shirts in plus sizes.  You could call the customer service number to inquire about the sleeve length if a local store isn’t nearby.

Alice

Posts: 57
Guest
Topic starter
(@Anonymous 94392)
Trusted Member
Joined: 1 year ago

Thanks for the tip.  I will check them out, too.

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