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One of the negatives associated with living as a woman is the need to always be aware of people and your surroundings. Today I had some workers install some rain gutters. When they arrived, I met them at the door in kind of skimpy clothing because I didn’t expect them early. They were Spanish speaking and although I speak Spanish, I acted as if I didn’t to see if they would speak English to be understood. They did a little. I went inside as they started work. I could hear them talking and commenting about me and saying what they would like to do to me sexually. As I listened they got really graphic, and I became concerned. I made sure I had a pew pew handy the entire time. They started talking about doing things to me after they were done that really shook me up. I debated about calling the company but I decided if they tried something I could handle them. They finished and didn’t try anything and left. I guess they were just talking smack to each other. Made me think how bad things could happen to women alone very easy. I have security lights and an alarm, as well as more than a few pew pews, but it makes one think. I made sure to give my neighbors the license plate of their truck and the name of the company, as well as their descriptions. Most of my neighbors love me and we all watch out for each other. Something to think about when we are out and about. Not everyone likes girls like us
I honestly think is the typical behavior of construction workers, if you have ever been in a construction site, you better be prepared to take it and dish it out, but never really gets beyond talk. I never really worked construction but I had to oversee numerous projects over my career, so I only got to see and hear the lighter part. I asked a relative who has worked construction all his life about, he said, it is brutal, no mercy, but all talk.
I really would not make too much of it, but it will be your decision of course, best of luck.
@sweetdani4luv I worked construction for almost 40 yrs and of course some trash talk happened but when it goes on for an extended period of time they need to be reported to their bosses. I owned my own construction company and I would hope that my customers would have let me know about my employees behavior so I could address it myself I would have never tolerated them relying on you not being able to understand them to belittle and or degrade you in anyway, that is totally unacceptable. Next time let them know you understand them from the start. I'm sorry you were put in that position, it is totally inexcusable. I have a daughter and I would never let anyone talk about her in that way if I knew about it. From all us construction workers out their I'm truly sorry.
Lacy
I would be making a representation to the company as this may be seen as the kind of conversation workers make your reaction and comments are key to this, it made you fearful. Obviously unaware you spoke Spanish is no excuse as this kind of behaviour is not acceptable.
Although you may feel you can handle it what about others?
@ab123 I seriously considered making a call but I have little confidence anything would be achieved other than possibly provoking a return visit. They know exactly where I live and really other than what they said, no actions were taken beyond words, and those were part of a conversation they were unaware I was privy to. I have been around locker room talk all my life and know how crude men can be in conversation. Now that I live as a woman, I see it from another perspective.
@sweetdani4luv I think your reasoning for not contacting the company is sound. I guess we ladies have been living with it --knowing men want us-- since the beginning of time.
XOXO
Dani
@sweetdani4luv Absent filing a complaint with the company, you might want to place a review on a website (Yelp, etc). Gets the message across but in a way that can be untraceable.
Yes, a word with the company sounds in order. If nothing else else it lets the company know who they have working for them and it would also caution the employees into not assuming things about who they are working around. While I have trained in martial arts, I know my limits around a work crew.
Pew pew.... I like that, ha ha .... Always have a pew pew, especially now days.
As for the workers, i would contact the company. Their behavior, especially in the presence of a customer was inappropriate, english or espanol.... Be safe.... Staci
I live full time and it is a real eye opener to experience the concerns and fears that GG women feel on a constant basis.
Hi Danielle,
So sorry you had to endure that vulgar chatter and the emotional worry of a really distressing situation, and as previously said, it's an eye opening experience going through a situation that GG women have to be concerned with on a regular basis.
When we are out and about in the real world, we can never take our personal safety for granted, especially when dressed en femme. Women are far more likely to experience violence when they are out in the world than men do, and when we are dressed, however unlikely you may think it; the potential for violence against us increases.
A few years ago, I went shopping dressed en femme. I was dressed in nothing more than some black leggings,white sneakers and a pink T-shirt. I had make-up on, my long hair was down and I blended in as far as I was concerned. I parked my car literally in front of the mall entrance and when I left it and was walking towards the door, an uncomfortable feeling suddenly came over me and I had the distinct sensation of being watched. I discreetly looked around and saw a man sitting in a white mini van intently watching me walk. The van was parked a few rows down from where my vehicle was and like mine, it gave a full on view of the mall entrance.
I got to the door and went in without much further thought of that man and spent maybe half an hour at the most inside the mall.
I walked back to my car the same way I had come in, and as I grabbed the handle of the door to push it outward, I looked up to see my car and I immediately noticed that the white mini van with the man in it was now parked in a spot next to my vehicle. My alarm bells went off. He could be harmless I thought, and he could be not. I had no way of knowing.
I stopped short, took a step backwards and thought for a moment.
I could do one of three things:
Wait till he left, but that might take time and it might put another person in harms way.
Go out to the car and hope he didn't try to do anything, and deal with it on my own if he did. I have a black belt in a martial art and can handle myself well, but what if he had a weapon, like a firearm or such? Again, I'd have to deal with whatever I thought could happen dressed en femme and all by myself.
Or........I could call the law and describe the situation I was in.
That is what I did. I decided to err on the side of caution. I called, told them what was going on, that I was suspicious of his behavior and described the vehicle and the guy in it. They told me they would send someone out.
It took about 15 minutes, but a patrol car finally did show up, parking behind the van so it could not back out. The officer went right to the drivers side and I decided not wait in the door entrance for this thing to play out. I walked out the door, went directly to my car without looking at the man or the officer, got in and drove away.
To this day, I am thankful for the officer who showed up and did their duty, and my family, who taught me the concept of situational awareness.
I grew up in NYC, and situational awareness was drilled into me and I am thankful it was. It has served me well, and when I took up a martial art; that concept was reinforced.
I am also thankful that you brought this subject up. It is something that needs to be discussed from time to time as a reminder that unfortunately the world can be a dangerous place to be in and we all need to be aware of our surroundings.
I can honestly tell you that experiencing what I did and hearing about similar situations from other women, has given me a much deeper compassion and empathy for women when I hear one tell of such concerns for their safety and security.
Always be safe when your out and about, be aware of what is going on around you, even when your enjoying your time in the world and never, ever hesitate to trust your instincts. Do what you have to do, to be safe!!!
Hugs,
Jennifer
@jenngirl76 I would have done the exact same thing Jennifer👍🏻. I grew up in the Bay Area of California. Back then you could go anywhere by yourself. Not today, not anywhere. No matter what anyone says about how “safe it is here.”
GP
@gracepal Grace, I agree whole heartedly with you. It's a jungle out there. I miss the days when you could go anywhere.
Be safe out there ladies, wherever you may roam.
Hugs,
Jennifer
Yes, Jennifer, this topic gets mentioned every now and then. My head is on a swivel whenever I go out. I just hope that I don't have to remember my training, either, but some of it is there if I need it.
@harriette I agree, some of my training is there also; muscle memory is an amazing thing!!
Yes muscle memory is an amazing thing.Having been born in Chicago and worked in the city for many years I can relate.Also the U S ARMY taught me well.Situational awareness is a wonderful thing especially for us part time ladies.Ladies be safe out there and PLEASE trust your instincts.
