Something is missing.

I kinda feel the same way! I get dressed, but then what? So I can relate!

hi Jessica. I feel the same way, although I am stuck mainly in our bedroom when I cross dress, as our boys dont know, only my wife. I do however when dressed, sit at my computer or even do jobs in the bedroom when dressed, I find it actually increases productivity! i'm more inclined to work dressed femme, than dressed drab, strange but true!

regarding you not going out, I feel that's really the issue, and its my issue too. you want to progress to the next level, but the niggling doubt in the back of your mind, puts the brakes on it. of course if we cant progress, that causes stagnation, frustration and to an extent, lack of motivation. ive thought long and hard what I would like to do, and its true, I do want to go out dressed femme. but there lies my problem, and it may be yours too, the fear of being seen or recognised and the fear of not passing, plus potentially other peoples rude, insensitive remarks. that in itself is enough to put you off, however, I keep telling myself, other girls have done it, so whats different about me?

I think the issue is what you want to do when dressed outdoors and the situation you are willing to accept. in my case, the ideal situation, would be a one to one meeting with someone, preferably in an environment where there were no members of the public. someones house would be ideal, but of course this raises far more issues, such as the other persons partner (wife or girlfriend), trust (they dont know me at all) etc etc. I would most likely go dressed drab and dress up at the said venue. I think this might build my confidence, but in all fairness, its extremely unlikely to happen. so whats the alternative? well that's purely down to you as a person. maybe you are not as timid as me and may push yourself further. its purely down to you Jessica. sorry for the long post!

fiona xxx

Ladies.......thank you for expressing your feelings. I think most of us have started out with mixed emotions about going out.  As I have been told......you have to learn to crawl before you can walk, you have to learn to walk before you can run.    As far as going past the front door en femme........it works the same way. Start out sitting on porch, then move to backyard, then nightime drive around, then daytime drive...build that confidence. Then a liitle walk at night till you feel confident about trying in daylight.

Now.......RUN!   Go into society with full confidence in yourself!  You have done it all....and having a ball.......fly and be free.   Read the book Johnathan Livingston Seagull   You are one with him.

Love to all, my Sisters

Dame Veronica

Hi

If you have a dressing service anywhere near you and a/. have the time b/. the funds and c/. can muster up the courage, go there and after being transformed, the owner should be more than happy to accompany you "out".

She, (never met a male doing this), will probably charge you for her time, (See b/. above), but at least you will be able to make that "initial breakthrough".

"Been there done that". And its a great thrill to do it first time and once you get up the courage, subsequent outings are even better.

I went "solo shopping" and "out to dinner" for the first time this year. Great fun and OK cos I used a professional make up artist and "looked the part", no one else batted an eyelid.

See photos on my profile.

Happy dressing and "Cavorting outside"

Caty

Hi Jessica,

Good post and questions.  Tough spots we have or are all in!

I think if you are going to go out fully dressed, you really want to refine your look.  You're appearance (fair or not), will always set judgement in peoples minds.  It's that "you never get a second chance to make a first impression", sort of thing.

Also, if/when stepping out be aware of your surroundings.  For example, I don't think I would have the same reaction (or non-reaction) in my home town as I do where I live now.  My home town would be more judgemental, and less accepting.

Take "small steps", and venture out "partially dressed" i.e., wear women's jeans and or shoes, and progress from there.  Go to the same place or places (coffee shop for example), where people are familiar with you, and seeing you.  Let them get used to the idea of your dressing.   I go to the same coffee shop everyday, everyday of the week.  This is significant as other people do the same thing.  I see them during the weekdays, when I'm in my "work clothes" (shirt and tie), and we all say "hello" to one another.  Those same people see me on the weekends when I'm in "hybrid mode", obviously wearing gurl jeans, shoes and even tights at times.  It is a stark and obvious difference, yet we still say "hello" to one another.

This has very quickly lead to me being more confident, self assured and I'll go just about anywhere in my hybrid mode of dress.  Now that said, I still feel apprehensive about running into people I know.  That will happen, it's just a matter of time but when it happens it happens.

One key factor (I truly believe) is the look.  It has to be clean, sharp to a degree.  I really pride myself in my dress and appearance and (this sounds narcissistic), I think I look really good in dress!  My SO (who does not accept my dressing), has even commented how good I look on a couple of occasions.   This has the same effect on the others I see out in public.  If I looked sloppy or un-kept, people would react differently.

Sorry, this was probably more than you bargained for, but I hope it helped in someway!  Let us all now how you progress on your journey!

Love and Hugs!

R