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In my previous publication, some of you girls mentioned how cross-dressing began to refine their temperaments, making them finer and less abrupt and rude, in my case it was a change of mood, before when I remained in denial of my identity as Felicity, it was a little bitter, I easily got irritated and felt great emotional pressure, like a pressure cooker used to cook food, until I couldn't take it anymore and faced that reality that I didn't want to acknowledge, I liked the feminine, I liked being delicate and feminine, and then I began to feel a change in my attitude towards my own being and towards others, I stopped complaining to God why I felt the way I felt and I began to thank God also for letting me be the wonderful person that Felicity is, I began to feel the fluidity of my person with life and to feel good about myself, I still lack it of course, there is still that feeling of guilt for not being the man that everyone expected me to be, rude, macho, womanizing, arrogant, that is the typical stereotype that is imposed on us in education, but also being felicity has allowed me to recognize my own ability to be tender, affectionate, calm, kind and happy with my own person, both male and female, and what do you tell me how it has affected your femininity to your temperament?
@latinagirlygirl Hey Felicity
Although your post touches on things that are rather more visceral and deeply-felt, this thread might still have some relevance:
Hugs
Ellie x
@ellyd22 Thank you Ellie for the suggestion, i already went to there and it was very interesting, thank you
@latinagirlygirl I get Irritated very easily when its been a while since i had the opportunity to be River and soon as I can My depression and general well being is all Immediately better . And lasts after for many days. Each time my wife sees my pictures she always says you look very calm and happy. and she is right. Cheers RC
@latinagirlygirl So far, I can't say that I go through any sort of temperament change. I may, but I don't recognise that kind of change.
In my male life, I am renowned for being very, very tolerant and patient. That hasn't changed. After many years of martial arts training, I learned to be much more confident in myself, and having been on-line since before the World Wide Web was released on the world, I developed a much more confident debate style.
This doesn't mean that no changes in me have been made since I started dressing. I am much more wary of other people and cautious, observant in public. There has to be some sort of elevated stress for me in public because of this.
This all has to be couched in how I dress. I don't go out in public fully en femme. I underdress and outwardly dress mostly androgynously. I am sure that doing so must confuse people, therefore my heightened awareness out in public. Confused people are a risk. That has to affect people's reactions to me and may affect my reactions to others and how I feel personally. Recent events have borne this out, too.
@harriette Thank you harriette for yor loving words, its very interesting your point of view
I find myself more relaxed and less reactive. My wife says I've become softer which I don't take as a bad thing.
@kellyann that is fantastic Kelly, i am still reactive and i know i need to work on it
I always believe that there a male to female spectrum. At the extremes there are ultra males and females. As you go towards the middle theer are feminine men and masculine women. Every one of us has each others temperaments but are changed by hormonal effects and social engineering.
I have always known and had been observed in male mode that I have many feminine traits and am not an ultra male. In my female world those traits that even I have had to cover up have now been allowed to flourish so being of the same temperament.
It is not uncommon for even an alpha male who likes to crossdress to feel 'different' and more feminine, is that because they are relaxing into a feminine appearance and allow those deeply hidden traits to come to the fore.
@ab123 thank you angela, in my case i think my femininity is very high, even more than masculinity thats the reason why i think all the effect in my personality before to accept felicity
My wife and mother-in-law say that I "carry" myself differently as Sarah. I have more patience, more compassion.
I don't think I'm any different whether presenting as a male, a female, or a male just wearing women's clothing. I've never been the toxic male (as you describe it, rude, macho, womenizing, arrogent). The softer side was always there. You may call it being kind, considerite, or just being a gentleman.
Presenting fully female gives me the opportunity to go out in public, and to interact as a female (playing for the other team). But it doesn't really change me as a person.
@alison-anderson well Allison i think i am the opposite of you, i think felicity changed the way i was facing my daily life, but it is a good point, learn from another life experiences, thak you Allison it is great to know your personal experience
Hi Felicity, like I probably posted in that other thread, when I'm in female mode, and it doesn't always have to be when I'm fully dressed, I just feel different. Things that are/were important to me in male mode, aren't, and other things are. I feel more relaxed, maybe a little more alive. It's like I sense other things about what's going on around me.
I'm already exhibiting some of the traits mentioned above (patience, being considerate, etc) but in female mode, it's all a lot more upfront and important. I've always been emotional about things, books, movies, stories from others, but it's more intense and involved in female mode. I know in female mode, I hold myself differently, walk, think even, do different things as a matter of course, like of course, that's what I should be doing, that I wouldn't necessarily do in male mode.
Probably should have transitioned years ago, but then, all these other events that happened to me, successful adult children, beautiful grandchildren, wouldn't be here, and I could never now deal with losses like that. I am what I am and for better or worse, I've learned to live with it all. Just dreams now.
ChoëC
@chloec thank you Chloe, great post and yes things are as it suppose to be, wow sorry for my english i hope i could express the idea correctly, i am still single but i want all you mentioned before, wife, children, grandchildren etc i dont know if i can get it fully as woman, just God and the time will say it
If a girl strives to grow and refine herself in the female arts, it should follow that her temperament will also improve.
Speaking from hard learned experience, associating with the right friends will go a long way in achieving personal growth in the female arts.
Simply put, hanging out with macho type girls will result in zero growth, while associating with girls motivated in becoming ever more authentic females will result in amazing growth in the female arts. Several years ago, after experiencing a negative growth experience, I resigned from a group of girls similar to the former above.
Select your girlfriends and/or support groups wisely!
@catgurl great advise thank you peggy sue, you are right, but in my case this journey is abosultely alone, there is not support group of friends in my real life that support me in crossdressing, my crossdressing journey is only me, but i apply this advise in social media and vitual friendship, the few friends i have are cd women veyy spectacular, very sensitive and educated
Interesting topic.
My wife has told me that I am less stressed and more relaxed when I dress. I have to agree with her as I feel different when I can dress. It is as if I shed my problems with my drab clothes and am able to be free to express myself in a way I couldn't normally. I spent most of my life being the macho guy who hid his feelings and didn't express or exhibit any emotions. It may sound silly but I am now able to softly weep when I watch emotional movies or shows, something I would suppress in the past.
I am disappointed in myself that I suppressed this part of myself all my life, however, I am happy that I have the opportunity to embrace it now. While I may not have as much time as I would like to have I make the most of what time I do.
XOXO
Suzanne
I don't feel my temperament has changed. I have never liked the male stereotype of being macho, etcetera, so maybe that is why I dress in the first place, I already have a more femme mindset.
@jjandme Fantastic sweetie, thank you for your charming words its really good to know about all your experiences
