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The Other Way

16 Posts
11 Users
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Posts: 1325
Topic starter
(@rebeccabaxter)
    Cornwall, United Kingdom
Joined: 1 year ago

Crossdresser Heaven is full of male-to-female cross-dressers. What we have to do to appear as a woman, is to modify our walk, our dress, our makeup, our voices, our behaviour. We have to wear nail polish and makeup, jewellery, uncomfortable (sometimes) shoes. So many things have to be attended to to give us our inner vision of womanhood, but at least the weapons are there in our armoury, it is how we use them that controls how well we do in our transformations.

Spare a thought then for the female-to-male cross-dresser. She (he) has no makeup to fall back on, many women wear men's clothes anyway, so that's not going to help. We can add breasts [of any size and shape we choose] and remove them as we see fit, the FtMer has the uncomfortable chore of binding hers to appear flat-chested. There is no jewellery to aid her, no perfumes to speak of, no facial hair to grow.

While we may think it is difficult appearing as a woman, it must be harder for the woman who wants to appear as a man.

There is a movie called The Assignment that stars Michelle Rodrigues, the plot of which consists of an assassin being turned into a woman. The opening scenes show Ms Rodrigues made up to appear male and despite all the efforts of a professional makeup and costume department, she still looks like a [hairy] woman. What chance does the occasional FtM cross-dresser have to 'pass' as a man?

However hard it is for me as a man to appear as a woman, it would be much harder if I was a woman trying to go The Other Way.

Becca

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15 Replies
10 Replies
Baroness
(@chrisfp99)
Joined: 2 years ago

Famed Member     London , Kent, United Kingdom
Posts: 1728

@rebeccabaxter An interesting perspective Becca. I assume FtM crossdressers are equally welcome here. Do we have any current members? It would be lovely to hear from them xx.

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Managing Ambassador
(@lizk)
Joined: 5 years ago

Illustrious Member     North County San Diego, California, United States of America
Posts: 3857

@chrisfp99 

They are welcome but are exceedingly rare.  I don't think there are any ATM, but I could be wrong.  There's no easy way to find out either.  Reporting is basically non-existent.

I know for a fact that there are some on TGH.  At least one is on staff.

/LK

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Managing Ambassador
(@lizk)
Joined: 5 years ago

Illustrious Member     North County San Diego, California, United States of America
Posts: 3857

@rebeccabaxter 

I think it depends on your perspective. 

Yes, it's very difficult for either gender to pass as the opposite gender....without hormones and possibly surgery.  I have seen trans women and trans men that absolutely pass.

To blend in, I don't think it's that hard for either gender.  Women have a lower bar because they don't have to deal with as much 'stuff'.  And there's no social stigma to them wearing guys clothes.

/LK

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Baroness
(@river)
Joined: 1 year ago

Noble Member     New Hampshire, United States of America
Posts: 827

@rebeccabaxter I dunno I guess for those that want to go hardcore with facial hair and all. Testosterone is pretty easy to get. but I don't think most CD women lead double lives like most of us. and its way less work to be a guy . "And So Boring !! lol " These days there are alot of feminine guys out there. smooth skin earrings.   Also part of the whole thing I think is feeling feminine  , which is not easy, also alot of money. as a guy I could have 5 shirts and 5 pants and be completely good for work. I have always been pretty hairless dont need facial hair to be a guy.  just having short hair for women is fine and easy. if the goal is either thor or jessica rabbit then its probably just as unattainable either way. but even getting 50%  of the way there i feel is harder for us. but that maybe because I feel im  particularly ugly for a guy lol.  Fun topic thanks Cheers RC

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Duchess
(@gracepal)
Joined: 5 months ago

Noble Member     South Carolina, United States of America
Posts: 1017

@river I agree River, as Liz stated -the lack of social stigma is a huge head start for FTM aficionados.

Where I live there’s more than a few “manly” looking women I just assumed were lesbians. Then I find they’re married to men, have kids, grandkids, etc. You never know.

I do wonder if some are “undeclared” crossdressers. They seem to have nothing in their wardrobes from the ladies department. One lady I know even brags about how she buys her and her husband the same exact shorts and t-shirts twice a year. I hear stuff like that and think: “Lady, if I were married to you my third divorce would be in the advanced planning stages right now.”

GP

 

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Baroness
(@river)
Joined: 1 year ago

Noble Member     New Hampshire, United States of America
Posts: 827

@gracepal You hit a topic I raised a while back . we love feminity,  sexy , beauty and if we dont get it with our partners I think it drives us more.  this also helps me to understand When someones SO does not want to be with or see a feminine man  as I personally would not want to be with a masculine woman.  

Its all so bloody complicated ,there are so so many differences and considerations.  uggh it hurts my head to try and make sense of it all. Confused Face But  I have a bit of a hangover today so that may be the cause as well lol.. Have a great day. RC

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Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 2 years ago

Illustrious Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 4015

Posted by: @river

I have a bit of a hangover today so that may be the cause as well lol.

I regularly hear about ZBiotics as a show sponsor. They claim it works at curbing hangovers. (I don't drink, so... YMMV.)

 

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Duchess
(@gracepal)
Joined: 5 months ago

Noble Member     South Carolina, United States of America
Posts: 1017

@river Yes, overthinking is another one of the favorite hobbies of the girls here on CDH River.🥰

GP

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Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 2 years ago

Illustrious Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 4015

Posted by: @rebeccabaxter

What chance does the occasional FtM cross-dresser have to 'pass' as a man?

However hard it is for me as a man to appear as a woman, it would be much harder if I was a woman trying to go The Other Way.

If you search for famous FtM crossdressers, you will find quite a few.

Many, including Hatshepsut (Egyptian Pharoah) and Joan of Arc, disguised themselves and fought in wars or quite a few tried to save themselves as spies. Hatshepsut was a bit unusual because she took power after her husband died. Everyone knew that she was female, of course, but she wore male attire, to give the air of male power.

Some things just don't change.

 

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Duchess
(@michellemybell)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Clearwater, Florida, United States of America
Posts: 624

@rebeccabaxter You make some good points in the context of being totally passable.  One big advantage the FTM women have though is that they can dress like men any time they like and as much as they like without social stigma.  Wish that was true for us and maybe someday it will be.

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Posts: 319
Guest
(@Anonymous 97944)
Reputable Member
Joined: 6 months ago

Short hair & flannel shirt?  Wash your face only on even days?  Dirty sneakers?  Steel-toed sneakers?  Start wearing socks?  Never polish your shoes?  Never clip your nails, always bit them off.  Bash the built-up ice off the windshield with your bare knuckles.  When you check the oil in your car, wipe your hands together afterwards to smooth out the dirt.  Carry a big wad of keys in your front pocket?  Develop a knack for snapping your head to check out a nearby girl?  Walk like you got a dirty diaper?  Carry something like a jar lid or earbud case in your panties which will frequently need to be tweaked or tugged so it doesn't fall through the leg band.  Its all about the mannerisms.

Dani

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1 Reply
Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 2 years ago

Illustrious Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 4015

@danikiss22 Be nice. 😆

Nailed it.

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Posts: 1742
Duchess
(@alison-anderson)
Noble Member     Middlesex county, New Jersey, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Just as an MTF tries to smooth out the face or fake higher cheekbones by creating an artificial shadow, I would guess an FTM could try to make the face appear more angular, or lower the cheekbones with contouring. Perhaps they can give themselves artificial 5 o'clock shadow. They could probably use glue-on bushy eyebrows like we glue on eyelashes. They could use artificial facial hair, perhaps going as far as ZZ Top to cover up much of the face.

Peter Pan is almost always played by a woman, yet we can easily talk ourselves out if it while watching.

Maybe it's not as hard as you make out.

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Posts: 798
Lady
(@michaela2001)
Noble Member     Goldsboro, North Carolina, United States of America
Joined: 8 years ago

My late wife was certainly not a crossdresser, but many of her clothes were bought from the mens department. Things like sweatshirts, teeshirts, jackets and some shoes, fit her better that those designated for women. It was more of a practical thing than crossdressing.

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Posts: 485
Lady
(@cherylt)
Prominent Member     Honesdale, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Joined: 7 months ago

I feel that the ftm has it a bit easier than we do. Jeans and a t-shirt, hair under a hat, sneakers and no makeup and many women could easily pass for a male. It might be an effeminate male but a male none the less. 

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