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Hope this is not too depressing; I mean it more nostalgia. We've probably all purged a few times. Not the end of the world to get new things.
I do miss a few pairs of nice leather pumps from the early 1990s. They must have been the last of the American made shoes, and they fit me really well. Seems like now shoes are super expensive or synthetic.
Would be glad to hear other stories if not too painful : )
@signoraaria Oh yes there are things I purged long ago that I wish I had now. One in particular was a Chocolate cowl neck dress with long sleeve that I loved and fit me so perfectly. Then there are the shoes of course and some of the pretty lingerie that went the way of the purge.
Thankfully I came out to my wife about 20 years ago and that will never happen again. Now the only time something is discarded is when it's worn out, doesn't fit right or just isn't worn often.
@signoraaria I was just thinking of some 4” block heels that I bought at Payless. They were my first heels and so comfortable, I threw them out in a purge and miss them so much.
@jennconn Sorry Jennifer! I see why GGs love their shoes so much. It is great when we find a comfortable pair.
Payless going bust was the start of the "retail apocalypse."
Hi, Aria, not depressing at all. Of course I've purged things that I now wish I hadn't but no point in getting depressed about something in the past that can't be changed.
Yes, two pairs of shoes. A pair of strappy, heeled sandals that had the straps tie halfway up my calf, gorgeous and comfortable. A pair of kitten heeled, slingback shoes that were the comfiest I've ever had. I loved them both. Hey ho, what can you do? 🤷♀️
Allie x
@alexina -- Yes, shoes are so fun and hard to find the right fit. But the search goes on!
@signoraaria So true Aria! Having purged more times than I would like to admit, I will offer this advice to any of the girls out there considering such a thing. You can purge if you want to, but your desires will not go away with your pretty things. So, in the interest of your sanity and your purse. If you are thinking about purging, do this. Pack up everything, and then wait ten days. By that time your guilt will have subsided and you will most likely not carry through with the purge. All this said, purging in part is not necessarily a bad thing, we girls need to update our wardrobes so periodically reducing the inventory can be a good thing!
I've lost count of how many times I purged. Many a treasure went into the bin.
But the one thing that breaks my heart is all the times I tossed self-love and acceptance. I simply couldn't fathom a life as my true self. Trading my identity for conformity and denial.
As many of us know, our identity doesn't ever abandon us....no matter how many times we push it away. It all comes back. Mine came back for good ten years ago. It took a few more years to embrace it and live the life I was meant to live. Smartest thing I ever did.
The last big purge was all my guy clothes several years ago. Yay!
Liz xx
@lizk Thanks for your thoughtful answer. I'm glad you embraced your path. Mine path is to have my two souls walk in harmony as best I can.
@signoraaria my regret was a purge I had that got rid of a lovely corsellette it was an open bottom with suspenders a front a that held me tight and have me a lovely busy .xxxpetita
@signoraaria - navy blue batwing dress with a cowl neck. It was in a fine knit and the hem length could be adjusted to just below or above the knee. Perfact fit. I felt really good in that and it fitted my posh, middle-class, party hostess look that I love to emulate. Alas, gone, and I can't find another.
@signoraaria - thank you Aria. It felt like a bit of fun and reflects the way I like to hang around, stretch out, and lick my paws. 🤣
@signoraaria I had a pink shirt dress before I came out to my wife and a pair of red stilettos to wear with it. I purges, not because I wanted to stop cross dressing, but because we were moving and they were difficult to hid. I loved that dress and those shoes. Hugs Christine
I feel you about the shoes. I had a pair of 4.5 inch peep toe pumps that I loved and were incredibly comfortable. I wore them to a MASH bash party and literally danced the night away in them. I have been morning their loss ever since I purged shortly after that. They just don't make shoes like that any more no matter how much I pay. I have missed other items as well but it's the well fitting comfortable heels that are the hardest to replace.
Oh I know exactly what your talking about. I had a beautiful lilac colored spring dress from JC Pennies with shear sleeves. I absolutely loved it and I had matching lilac 3” strappy sandals that were so cute. You guessed it, purged! I would love to have it back. One of my all time favorites.
@ellie56 it was from their catalog many many years ago but still talk about that outfit. It was so gorgeous.
@nickicd Was sorry to see the catalog go! We are still JCP shoppers, but they're not what they used to be. I remember reading that JC Penney probably dressed most of the schoolteachers and office workers in the country back in the day : )
Oh girl .. there a many items I wish I could have back. A white cowl neck sweater dress probably tops my list of clothes. A fabulous white and pink Bali matching bra, panty and garter belt set that fit just perfect along with several long nightgowns. I try not to dwell on my losses knowing it goes with the territory.
Natalie💋💋💋
@splitdecision I feel your pain. But as you say we've all been there. I'd bet you have some fabulous new things.
@splitdecision PS we must be similar generation, I remember when the girls had cowl necks : )
@signoraaria I checked out your profile and yes we are the same generation.
I know that many of the clothes I purged through the years are no longer in style but I still miss having them.
out with the old and in with the new!
💋💋
Oh my, I've purged many items in the past. If I had a delorean I'd hit 88 and go back in time and save all those items, but alas i can't.
Some items I regret purging are the 80s/early 90s aerobic wear. I had quite a few in my collection, the spandex body suit plus the spandex leggings (precursor to today's yoga pants girls wear). I loved wearing those. I also had a silver/black zentai/catsuit, but that also didn't survive the purge. I had some vintage one piece swimsuits that I wish I had back.
There is always ebay to replace some of those items, but because it is vintage (which means the seller will ask for an exorbant price) and sizing, that will never happen.
Purging for me is to make space for more clothes being the lucky girl I am. In the past there were things that didn't fit, bad styling and were not the 'me' I was trying to find. There are always things that in time would have suited and I miss them. Now as I look through my wardrobe are items that were bought in the past that still grace the rails as they are wearable and pass scrutiny.
One item I thought had long gone was a dress that was in my hidden 'stash'. It was bought from a charity shop many moons ago and the label was from a store that is long gone but a fashion in the late sixties/early seventies. When I left home I took my stash with me , or so I thought. Years passed and soon after coming out to my mother about thirty years ago she gave me that dress. She had been sorting out a wardrobe in what was my old room and found it in a bag. She couldn't recall buying it but realised it mine after I told her. I had it back and is still worn hanging pride of place in my wardrobe and she saw me in it a few times. Fashion of that day is now retro so gets some nice comments.
@ab123 Great memories Angela. Really nice you had that kind of relationship with mother. Could never have told my late mother - very religious conservative : (
@ab123 PS I also take your point about things that don't fit or not the style you wanted. I've also ordered items that looked good on the screen, but in person were not right for me.
It's been a long time since I purged but I do have a few things that just don't do it for me. So now the purpose of purging is to make more room in my closet(s) for things I really like and want to wear.
I don't remember much about what I purged so I suppose it's no great loss.
Purging seems as futile as cutting the lawn or shoveling snow. Grass grows back, more snow eventually comes. You try to tell yourself you're all through with crossdressing, but sooner or later the old desires return.
This time around, I'm. rolling with it.
R.
Girls, i really regret purging the French maid outfit and deleting the photo of me wearing it. At the time I thought my arms looked too masculine but my legs went on forever. What an iconic Halloween costume but history now… Sniff….
I cant regret things I've purged all those years ago for one very good reason. There's no way they would fit me!!...I was a 14/16 dress size and now firmly 18/20
Caty.
@ryanpaul I've gone the other way. I couldn't lose weight for years. Then in 2023, I had cancer, which ended up removing part of my stomach as well. It is equivalent to baryatric surgery.
I went from an 18/20 to a 10/12. I had skirts that were falling off of me. I was able to save a couple by adding belt loops or a belt, taking in the waist, or adding a clip designed to pull in the back of jeans to pull in the back of the skirt. But I still ended up pruning over 2 dozen skirts along with some corsets that were just too big.
@alison-anderson Bad luck about your "big sizes" Alison good news that you survived your surgery.
Happy dressing
Caty.
That's looking on the bright side!
I have several items I think about that I wish I had back. The two items I wish I had back, however, is a pair of Cacique brand double string bikini panties and a glow in the dark cotton nightie. The panties were white cotton with black cheetah spots and pink trim. The nightie was blue cotton with white clouds and stars that glowed in the dark. That was often my night time outfit after my ex and I parted ways and the outfit gave me a real sense of comfort. It was lost along with a lot of stuff in a purge, thinking "I really need to stop this".
Spoiler alert: the purge didn't stop my dressing.
The heels are what I miss most of all because of the work involved in attaining them.. for every pair that fits perfect , there’s 2 more that don’t fit right at all.
Oh my! SOOOO much purging. There are many dresses I wish I could have back, but then I rationalize that they wouldn't fit anymore anyway. But the shoes! I have orphaned so many beautiful heels. I really mourn a fantastic pair of peep toe, 4" heels, small platform and gorgeous frilly bows on the toes. They were a black and silver lace like pattern and had that perfect heel that was in between block and stiletto. Perfect fit and so comfy and easy to walk in. What was I thinking!!!?? (Mind you, this was easily 20 years ago and it still rips at my heart). I do agree with others...hold that purge. I now box it up and forget about it for awhile. Sometimes when I go back to the box I still donate/sell and even trash some of it. But I do end up keeping a lot too. Most of the time I am very thankful that I didn't rush into purging. I never want to mourn the loss of another pair of perfect heels!
Oh god, yes! The stuff I regret purging... foremost in my mind is the matching black satin girdle with suspenders and longline bra which I don't think I ever truly appreciated until I no longer had them 🙁
The beautiful black satin and taffeta ballgown, full-skirted with net and satin underskirts, sweetheart bustline, off-the-shoulder with sheer balloon puff sleeves. It was so gorgeous and felt so very sexy to wear, like a Goth wedding dress. I loved that dress.
Several pairs of boots over the years... thigh-length ones, ankle booties, knee-length - I remember especially a beautiful pair of grey suede knee-high cavalier boots with a fabulously high conical heel. Sigh.
And so many lovely pencil skirts of all kinds. Double sigh!
Really only one thing, my 1950 Indian Chief. Sold for tuition money in 1967. After that I learned my lesson. Marg
