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Three male tendencies CDs need to Avoid

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Posts: 763
Duchess
Topic starter
(@kristacanada)
Prominent Member     Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Joined: 8 years ago

Hi Everyone, I just came across a very interesting video on YouTube by Sydney Lovekiss, someone who started as a CD and is now in transition.  She talks about three things we do that as CDs we need to avoid.  Briefly: checking out women; mansplaining, and trying to fix women. Sydney explains it a lot better than me in her short six minute video.  Here is the link: 

Oh and check out some of her other videos.  She has a lot of relevant videos on topics of interest to us.   Take care, have a wonderful weekend, And have a Very Happy Easter, Hugs, Krista.

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Lady
(@paulaf)
Noble Member     Pampa, Tx, Texas, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

There are a lot more than 3, and I am sure we will have quite a list before too long.

1)  Scratching your crotch

2)  Wide open mouth yawning

3)  Trying to pass wind without anyone noticing then blaming the dog

4)  "Hey watch this!  Hold my beer."

5)  Saying "I'm only going to explain this once."              again.

6)  Going to the hardware/sporting goods/auto parts store "for a few minutes"

PaulaF

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(@Anonymous)
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Hi Krista,

I enjoyed the video. I'm nowhere near being dressed in the company of women but ...

eek ! Mansplaining - guilty as charged. To be fair I'm gender neutral on this - I mansplain to men too. Oh ... no, that's the whole point ...

Work in progress on this one, I think 😉

Marti xxx

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(@Anonymous)
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That was interesting Krista.  Thanks for sharing!  I do have to ask something to see if others here experience the same thing.  Maybe I'm self conscious, maybe I do this and don't realize it.

I have to preface this by saying, as a guy, well as a girl too, I love breasts.  Don't know what it is.  I just love them.  Anyway, I work in an office and I try to be VERY conscious of when I'm talking to females (everywhere, but especially in the office), that I'm looking in their eyes and not letting my eyes wander.  I've worked with some majorly attractive women over the years and several like to flaunt 'the girls' and it's hard not to peek, but I try to be laser focused on the eyes.  To my question, I notice that when I'm talking to a female, if they are wearing a jacket, they will always close it over their breasts when they're talking to me and it doesn't necessarily happen right away.

As I said, I'm really focused on their eyes with mine and don't wander, but then they cover up and I wonder, did I just look without knowing?  Maybe GG's do this out of habit regardless of who they're talking to and I just am over sensitive to it.  Not sure.  Just wanted to get other opinions.  Maybe this is a weird question, but listening to Sydney's video made me think of it.

tara 🙂

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(@Anonymous)
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Thanks Krista! I just found her about a week ago and subscribed on YouTube. She has a number of VERY GOOD short videos for cross dressers that are very practical. Same with Kimberley Beregrove, whose channel I also subscribe to. I really like Kimberley too because she is also a very devoted and fairly conservative Christian like me, but she makes no apologies for her CD/TG self.

I think the one thing that frustrates me a little bit about both of them (and I mean this in a purely selfish way, not in a general condemnation way), is that I think they both once billed themselves “merely” as CDers but then both have now embraced the notion of transitioning into women with hormones and such. That’s great for them if that’s what they feel they need to do. It’s not so great for me and those like me who keep trying to convince our wives/SOs that we are not going to become women ourselves and someone they don’t recognize and didn’t marry. That’s one of the reassurances many of us want to give, but the more you see people leaving CDing behind for transition, the harder it becomes to make that a convincing case. I would love to show my wife some of Kimberley’s thoughts on how CDing fits in with her faith, but the minute she would discover that Kimberley now has moved on to transitioning, I would hear the, “I told you sos.” It scares our wives to see people take those next steps we promise we wouldn’t take. Again — selfish rant not a judgment against them and what they’re doing. Just that it makes it harder for me and those like me.

P.S., I don’t think mansplaining is a thing, at least in how it is used in culture. It’s how men talk period — not directed specifically as it’s billed, which is as a patronizing approach to women. We tend to be matter of fact with everyone. We tend to ignore emotional cues and just explain stuff to everyone. I wish we could just call it what it is without the gender tinge to it: patronizing. And nobody likes it when someone patronizes them, men or women. We would all do well to, as my wife says, “watch our tone.”

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(@Anonymous)
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Totally agree Paula...

and the list will grow and grow....

Worst one for me is number three...I don't have a dog...yikes!!!!

Grace ❤️❤️

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(@Anonymous)
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Tara,

As a friend recently told me, “even gay men look at cleavage! It’s hard wired into our brains!” Lol.

Let’s be honest. It’s a sexually-connected characteristic women have, and it’s obvious, and they KNOW it’s obvious and actually often try to enhance by what they wear. WE know that better than anyone, right? All the tutorials about breast forms and creating the illusion of cleavage and the desire to “show them off” when you can have them. Push up bras, showing a little lace from the bra, showing bra straps, low cut blouses/dresses, etc etc.

So I don’t think it’s a matter of whether we look. Of course we do. We know it; they know it. It’s HOW we look. Observing breasts in a passing glance every once in a while without lingering your stare there is not disrespectful; I think it’s natural. Dropping your jaw, leaning in and boring a hole with your eyes through their breasts: disrespectful.

So like you, I just try to be cognizant of when my eyes “slip” and then immediately return them to their eyes. If it helps you, maybe you can study how they did their eyeliner, eyeshadow, and mascara for tips! 😂 (Yes, that actually helps me). Plus, I think the most beautiful feature of any woman is her eyes. I love eyes. And I love how they enhance the beauty of their eyes.

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Posts: 763
Duchess
Topic starter
(@kristacanada)
Prominent Member     Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Joined: 8 years ago

Hi Paula, thanks for your post.  Your response had me chuckling several times.  It's always a good sign when we recognize our behavior and then can laugh at our selves.  Hugs, Krista

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(@Anonymous)
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That's a great idea!  Thanks!!

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Guest
(@Anonymous)
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Did you just mansplain about how men don't really mansplain but that's how they talk?

HA!!  LOL!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂

(Also, just making sure you know I'm just joshing you and wasn't serious 🙂 )

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(@Anonymous)
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Tara,

No; I patronized you!!! Lol! 😂 😆 😝

Steph

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(@Anonymous)
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Ah you may not have a dog Grace but you have a mole, no not the ones on your body sweetie,but the one in your garden, that in the absence of a dog could be considered a direct replacement for one. 

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Posts: 763
Duchess
Topic starter
(@kristacanada)
Prominent Member     Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Joined: 8 years ago

Hi Tara, like Sydney said in her video, you notice when you are being stared at.  One time when I was really glammed up in a cocktail dress, black stockings, heels, professional make up, etc, I felt that someone was staring at me.  I looked around the room and sure enough there was a young guy just staring - like burning a hole right through me. It really made me feel put off.  I don't mind when guys are flirting with me, it's kind of fun; but the intense staring is NOT fun. Thanks again.  All the Best, Hugs, Krista.

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(@Anonymous)
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🙂

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(@aliceunderwire)
Illustrious Member     Near Burlington, Vermont, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Hi Krista,

Happy Easter to you.  Will check out the link.

Alice

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