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In several posts sisters have told of their fear of shopping for new dresses in femme mode. It is not as dangerous as you might think. Here's why:
First, like I've said a hundred times here------plan, plan, plan.
Bring a strapless foam bra for strapless styles and swimsuits. Extra pantyhose in different colors and panties. Bring your camera or phone. I bring a light pillowcase to go over my head to keep my makeup off of their clothes. I bring a long woven nylon string to help with zip-up and zip downs if they don't offer.
So, get over the anxiety threshold girls...they want you in their store.
There are some stores like my faves Nordstrom, Laura and Melanie Lynne where the sales people are on commission on top of their regular wages. They are interested in three things: sales, job security through positive reports for managers and creating a long term $$$ relationship with you and your purse. This is easily detectable from their demeanor when they engage you (or not) in the store. If they are on the clock only they will avoid you or just direct you as in "evening dresses are at the back, call me if you need help..." Time to leave. But if they do engage you engage them back. You need not tell them you are a crossdresser or trans or whatever. They've already seen us hundreds of times. So don't tell them. This is their job and what they love to do...help women with great fashion choices. Good ones will ask your size. Great ones will ask measure to you. LET THEM! They have all kinds of shoes and heels for customers to help with try ons in every color and size...ask for this. They have shapewear, slips, crynolins etc. for try-on. You arrived in their store as girl so be an honest, "girl" right up front. I usually compliment the store with a line like "I've always admired your windows. I'm new at your kind of fashion and I am curious to find my best style. Your clothes are amazing". If you like what the CSR is wearing ask if she got it there. Try it on if they do. The best CSR's will bring you more selections while you are already in the change room. It's your golden free pass...thank them and try everything they offer. If they ask if you need help...well girl yes you do, don't be shy. Even if you can manage it always ask for a zip up. They like doing this. If they want to adjust anything and touch you...let them....they are pros and they know how. Compliment their perfume. If they mention your hair up or down go for it. The best stores have brushes, clips...whatever. Some will suggest jewellery and accessories....go for it. Some store like Laura will allow photos.They will compliment you so blush a little and so smile girls smile. ASk if it is going on sale soon. Our larger sizes always do. Again, relax, be a girl and enjoy...they've met our kind before. They like serving you as much as anyone. you probably will try clothes they rarely show to average women. They are in fashion because they love fashion and they want you back as a customer in the future, even if you don't buy..... this time.
The best stores are not just selling dresses and cruisewear, they are selling an experience. I can't think of a better one!
Very good advice there. I have just recently had the confidence to be out and go shopping for clothes totally en femme, and I much prefer it to shopping in the same place in male mode.
Also, it doesn't matter if the staff peg you for trans, like Harietta says, they want you and your money. I also have this theory that if they do realize that you're not a GG, and they give you a good product and service, you are even more likely to shop there, as so many of us are a bit anxious when out en femme.
The other thing is you can get the sized right, as if you're dressed, you will be wearing your usual forms and/or hip pads, so your shape will be correct.
Amy
Hi Harietta,
Nordstrom is the crown jewel. That would be the ultimate challenge.
I've been to Torrid. Junk. I've been to Ross. Junk. I haven't been to Maxx, but I assume the same. Low prices means low quality.
Nordstrom. I've been there in many cities with my wife. As soon as you arrive "may I help you find something", if you are holding a dress "would you like me to start a room for you". Great service, very good quality, reasonable prices. If you like big prices go to Neiman's, sometimes known as Neiman "Markup".
I would love to walk into Nordstrom's dress section and look for something for myself. Wow! Girls, I'm not that brave.
The Saturday Wall Street Journal occasionally has an ad for "terijon" dresses. They have a size 14! If I had storage......
Jessica
Great advice.
Hi Harietta,
Wonderful advice! I love your suggestion to bring a nylon string to assist the zipper.
Alice