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As I relax on the setee with my legs up in my chemise, panties, and pantyhose ( but with dressing gown loosely over for warmth ) I am firming up in my mind the decision to venture out wearing female clothes but it does create some uncertainty in my mind about how much I am wanting from my crossdressing and therefore how far I will comfortable with going. I know that I like the different feel of women's clothes but unlike so many of my fellow gurls on here I do not have an innate sense of there beng a female inside me wanting to be let outand therefore feel a bit of a fraud being here with you all.
Because I do not recognise an inner female in me I equally do not feel a strong sense of wanting to pass as a female when I venture out but this does bring the risk of attracting more attention. Hence at this stage my attire for going out will be cami, panties, pantyhose, dress (or top and skirt ), and sandals ( I have a pair of black ballet pumps that are just a bit too big bought by mail order but thecost of sending them back to change would be almost the cost of them with my male coat over the top.Has anyone else on here ventured out without going as far as breast forms and make up.
Developing my range of female attire futher is very limited at the moment both in terms of cost and discrete storage as just underdressing created a huge problem with my SO and therefore my whole inclination has had to be put firmly in the closet but I have really enjoyed my few days of being alone and therefore wearing what I like whilst indoors other than when having any family visit.
It all feels very strange as something that stsrted as a few panties a year ago to enhance self pleasuring has become something very different but the feeling of pantyhosed legs sliding across each other and a chemise sliding over panties and body in bed is something devine to enjoy.
Sorry I have gone on a bit.
Rachel
Yes have gone out with out breast forms but made up a false breast t shirts socks etc until looked right. I think if you have got this far is to do it. Honestly your feel so good about yourself for doing it night time is good gives a bit of cover in itself. But obviously there are so many other things to take into consideration i.e. not in the least where you live etc etc. But I'm sure other members will have there knowledgeable advice. Deborah
Rachel, my feelings are similar in that I don't desire to be a woman. I just want to be me with freedom to wear the clothes that are comfortable and allow me to be me. As such, my wardrobe is frequently a mixed ensemble of both men's and women's fashion. Though I never wear a wig, and rarely use makeup, I have not let that stop me from dressing publicly how I wish. I do understand that everyone's situation is different, but hope this helps.
Mackenzie Alexandra
Mackenzie,
Thank you that was a helpful and very reassuring comment. Well I did do it. Went out to car with my coat covering me wearing a white lacy dress, white cami, cream patterned panties, black panty hose, and black sandals. Had to work on the basis that should a neighbour happen to be looking acress the road I will have the car between their sightline and my legs before their eyes drop down to that level.
Drove for a little way and then briefly stopped to take my coat off. Then drove on to park near a beach some miles away where I got out and walked to the beach and sat at the side of it for a while then returned to the car and cstopped at a supermarket on the was home. Bearing in mind that I was not trying to pass as a female in that i had no wig, no bust, and no makeup, i did not feel any staring at me and the supermarket check out operator made no comment and avoided using any gender prefixing in dealing with me. i was not seeking any extensive interaction but I did walk past a number of people at the beach and was relatively leisurely in going up and down the aisles in the supermarket.
It felt wonderful to be wearing the clothes of my choice and the slight sea breeze felt fantastic as it wafted up inside my dress whilst sitting with legs stretched out on the sea defence wall.
I hope to repeat the experience tomorrow or Friday but wearing a top and skirt and then everything gets put away again for a while.
Rachel
Rachel
Good Morning Rachel,
I too do not necessarily believe there is a woman inside of me wanting to come out, I just love the clothes and how they make me feel!
I would like to go out sometime in full dress however.
Well I managed to go out dressed for a second time. Today it was a thin floral top with skirt, pantyhose, and sandals ( with panties and cami ). Was a little more cautious today so put a pair of trousers and jumper over the top for moving between house and car as I sensed more movement by neighbours. Took jumper and trousers off after I had driven away from my immediate neighbourhood.
Drove to a Nature Reserve and had a stroll around. Did not go past as many people as on Wednesday and did not go for any shopping interaction this time. It now means that I have tried outside what I feel is the better of the few items of female clothing that I have. Yes some nervousness but I did not let it stop me doing what I had promised myself.
Found the drive back really enjoyable as with it being a warm and sunny day I had the drivers window wide open and the feeling of the movement of air circulating between the top and my back was wonderful.
Do not know when the opportunity to do this sort of thing will occur again but for now the clothes need to be put away again and improve the readiness for seizing the next opportunity. Need to sort out on the shoes and also whether to go for suspenders and stockings rather than pantyhose.
Have to say that I preferred being in the dress to skirt and top as I did worry about whether it was hanging level but probably also because the dress finished just above the knee whereas the skirt was below the knees. May sound silly bearing in mind the infrequency of the opportunities but have ordered another dress.
Rachel
We're all born with both an X and a Y chromosome, so our female side is there. But she might be perfectly happy in a submissive role (to our male persona) and in a very private environment. There's nothing wrong with that.
I like to think of my female persona as a partner in life. And as partners, we need to compromise, set ground rules and respect each other's needs. If she decides she's ready to take the risk and go out in public, I won't stop her. At the same time, if she decides that just cuddling up after dark behind closed doors makes her the happiest, I will certainly comply. In many ways, it's like a marriage...till death do us part.