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Told my siblings

9 Posts
7 Users
22 Reactions
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Posts: 11
Lady
Topic starter
(@thegalinthemirror)
Eminent Member     Ohio, United States of America
Joined: 11 months ago

I made the decision over the weekend to tell my brother and sister about my crossdressing.  I didn't have the guts to tell them face to face so I told them in a group text.  I didn't want them to feel like I was putting them on the spot.  So I thought I would get a more genuine response by doing it that way.  I had written that text about half a dozen times in the past, but I never had the nerve to send it.  But yesterday I took a deep breath and pressed send.  I am very close to my brother and sister so what they think of me is very important.  I also wanted to let them know how I felt guilty for not even giving them the chance to help me during my darkest days of depression.  They didn't know I was even depressed because I kept the source of my depression a secret from them.  Well after I pressed send, I waited for a response from either of them, and for a while no responses came and I started thinking I made a mistake.  But then, after 15 minutes I got a response from my sister.  This was her response.

 

I'm not sure how to respond.

I'm sure you feel better getting it off your chest and I'm sorry you have had deal with it alone all your life. 

That was all I needed. Empathy and not judgement.   

 

My brother finally responded about 15 minutes after that.  I can tell he doesn't get it, but my sister said to give him time. It's a lot to take in.  My brother said he would never turn his back on me but he told me to find a new therapist because "that is not who you are.  You are not defined by a compulsion"

All in all it did feel really good to get off my chest.

 

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8 Replies
2 Replies
Lady
(@jillleanne)
Joined: 2 years ago

Prominent Member     Renfrew, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 600

@thegalinthemirror big brave move by you and I understand your reasoning completely. Good for you. Hopefully all will stay positive moving forward for you. Your siblings will have lots of questions moving forward so stay patient and honest .  I betting everything will be just fine in the future.

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Duchess
(@loneleycd)
Joined: 5 years ago

Famed Member     Roland, Iowa, United States of America
Posts: 2157

@thegalinthemirror 

That is a huge step for you. Hope all goes smoothly for the 3 of you. Having a measure of acceptance or tolerance is what we all crave. Sibling love and caring can be such a joy. 

All my best to you. Cassie 

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Posts: 1742
Duchess
(@alison-anderson)
Noble Member     Middlesex county, New Jersey, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Thanks for sharing, Trixie. I think you're sister is right. You have had a lifetime to come to terms with your crossdressing. Your siblings have only had a short time. Your brother may be partially right that you are not defined by your compulsion, but it does play a part in who you are as a person.

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Posts: 10
(@jennifergirl1)
Eminent Member     Michigan, United States of America
Joined: 1 year ago

Wow Trixie, that took a lot of courage to send that text message. Sounds like your sister is very understanding, I’m sure your brother will come around he just doesn’t understand fully what we go through.

hugs, Jennifer

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Posts: 112
Lady
(@denisemichelle1979)
Reputable Member     Saginaw, Michigan, United States of America
Joined: 1 year ago

I was pretty comfortable telling my family. Now I'm in female mode 24/7 and love it. My parents accepted me as their daughter and my sister's accepted me as their sister. 

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Posts: 675
Duchess
(@catherine0918)
Prominent Member     Henderson, Nevada, United States of America
Joined: 2 years ago

Trixie,

Welcome to CDH!

I think you will find the community helpful, encouraging and supportive.

That took a great deal of courage to send that text as others have said and I commend you for it.

I am a totally private dresser, no one knows and if anyone did, I don't think anyone would understand.

I am okay with that as I am okay with me being a cross dresser, full-time at home, love it and enjoy it.

It sometimes is as much about how we feel about our being a crossdresser than what others may think or feel about it.

Anyway, thanks for sharing your story and I again commend you on your courage.

Again, welcome to CDH!

Catherine

 

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Posts: 11
Lady
Topic starter
(@thegalinthemirror)
Eminent Member     Ohio, United States of America
Joined: 11 months ago

Thanks everyone.  It did require some extra bravery to tell them, but I think it was the right decision.  I told my sister today that I would rather have people playfully tease me or razz me about it than to avoid the subject at all costs.  When they avoid it and don't want to ever discuss it that is when I start feeling bad about myself, like I'm some kind of sideshow freak.  She replied with "IT doesn't matter to me whether you're in a tuxedo or a tutu your still my nerdy brot.... I mean sibling.  She really knows how to brighten my day.

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1 Reply
(@thegalinthemirror)
Joined: 11 months ago

Eminent Member     Ohio, United States of America
Posts: 11

Just thinking....I've never worn a tutu.  Hmmm

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