what type of cross dresser are you?

Cathy,

Great post and really succinctly expresses where I am as a cross dresser.

Thanks for saying it so well.

Catherine

I am a cross dresser and just love the clothes. Love my girly side once in awhile but love the man i am

I honestly cant say.  When I could dress, I liked doing it.  Now that I cant ... I miss it... but only sometimes.  I often have been addressed incorrectly as a female.  Though I hated it when it happened, I now look forward to it.  In fact, my name came from some one thinking I was a female and that was the name.  Still figuring it out I guess..

I'm like many others who don't know the real reason why I crossdress but I have been doing it for most of my life.    I do love all types of women's clothes and my real favorite is dresses since they are something that is uniquely feminine.  While I would love to wear dresses and all the time, I am very content now to wear more everyday clothes like leggings, shorts and cute sneakers.   As time has gone on, I feel more and more of a connection to my femininity which leads me to believe that I am really trans and that crossdressing lets me exist in my authentic state.

Very interesting thread.  I would say for me it was definitely an expression of sexuality that got me started.  Call it a kink, a fetish, a turn-on, or whatever.  It's just one of those things that came about in that part of the mind where intimacy, pleasure, yearning for affection, desire, and all those other things hang out and contemplate the expanses of love and sex and happiness.  We all have ideas of what constitutes love, what is sexually appropriate or not, and what we think it is that will fulfill those ideas.  Some stick with those ideas throughout their live.  Others allow those ideas to evolve.  I'm one of those in the evolving category and as far as crossdressing goes it was the sexual expression that kicked things off.

Now however, as I've progressed in my exploration I'm learning there is much, much more to the mentality of why I do it.  And what I chose to wear and how in-depth I chose to go seems to have a lot to do with what part/s of myself I'm expressing or allowing the freedom to come out, to exist.  If I really try to get deep about it I can start to see that a lot of the things I've been searching for in life from other people actually live inside of me.  But I've never known that from trying to live in that box that men in rural, blue collar, hard working, conservative communities are supposed to live.  I've never felt at home there.  Crossdressing it seems is something that is allowing me, the real me, to finally begin to exist.

What that means, I don't know.  I'm still exploring where a fit along the spectrum of what is generally considered male or female.  Am I a guy who likes to where feminine clothing?  Am I a woman trapped in a man's body?  Something in between?   Don't know.  And maybe that's the true reason why, to find those answers.

Dear Fiona,

1. you just like womens clothes

Yes! definitely. Whom can say no to a glamorous dress, knee high stocking and killer heels? Womens clothes are meant and designed to look and feel good. Good to look to be seen by others and when worn its meant to flatter ones physic. Unlike male garments, female garments are made with specific fabrics chosen to make one feel a certain way when worn. It goes beyond more than just wearing clothes

2. you are femme at heart like a woman stuck inside a mans body

Yes! I believe we all have both within ourselves, it just whether we want to admit it and deny or embrace it. Society makes it difficult for men to embrace their feminine side and on the contrary women expressing their masculine side is celebrated.

3. wearing womens clothes is like a kind of sexual thing, maybe a fetish or roleplay

Yes! When we look good, we feel good and we are turned on. There is definitely a sense of role play and character as we are embracing all the feminine qualities. When men see women dressed up, they are turned on by what they see. Women dress up and admire themselves in the mirror. It only makes sense as crossdressers, we love what we see in the mirror!

sweetly and glamorously,
The bluest belladonna

This is a very good question, and answering helps me explore my CD motives and urges, so thanks a lot! X

I feel that my liking of women's clothing is an instinctual thing that started very early in life. I remember wearing my sisters dresses in delight when I was about 6 years old.
Not very long after, age 7, sexuality came into play, because I noticed I was different, and was attracted to boys. In my mind, my fondness of women's clothing and liking boys intermixed and became 'part of the same system', but looking at it now, they are separate.
I am not one of those obviously feminine gay men; most people are very surprised when they hear. Bug inside... boy, am I a girl! (pun intended 😉 ) And wearing women's clothing immediately brings out that girl and 'allows' her to be, to show herself. So yes, Frédérique has always been there with me.
And like many other ladies explained, if I wear my undies and and bra and feel great and look good, it is a turn on! But for me that goes in waves. Sometimes I get turned on very strongly, only to litterally physically embrace myself seconds later, embrace Frédérique in a loving hug, really loving the girl inside.
One final aspect of my recent 'uptake in CD activity' has to do with my body and figure. Over the last 4 years, I have lost 45 kg's of weigth. My doctor warned me I was close to develloping diabetes and so I radically changed my lifestyle (keto). And now I am back in the size range where I can buy regular sized clothes and also fit size 48 (EU) women's clothing. And those clothes and especially the underwear adorn my still slimming body and that feels oh so very good. So I not only love that Frédérique can come out and play, but also that I'v found a new love of my body, even though I'm still in the 110 kg range. Trying to get that under 100 before I reach the age of 50 next February.

From my perspective it was the allure of the clothing in that I always appreciated the female body and the way clothes can transform a person. Once I got married it was the fetish/kink side of things with my wife and occasionally would wear stockings or her panties under my male clothes and surprise her.
Just recently I have built a full wardrobe through online and my wife has helped me buy underwear. She finds the sight of me in knickers sexy, I love the feel and the process of change.

From my perspective I agree with the OP that I think every male either has worn something feminine or has a secret desire to. My drive to dress is not as a woman trapped in a male body but as someone that likes to express his feminine side, love the illusion and feel of the clothes and would still love to experience a night out (not in my smallish city) dressed and do a whole weekend dressed up. It is more about putting myself literally in their shoes.

I honestly do not know.   I know at a young age I saw my moms stockings drying on the shower curtain and one day I had to try them on.  From that day I was hooked really good.  I just could not leave anything female alone.  I did not want to be female I just wanted to look like one!  This was a very dark time for me.  At school I had no friends and I was like an outcast.  I did not know it at the time but  I was screaming inside for someone to love me.   Anyone!   I was alone and no one came to my rescue.  I hated high school!  I never really got a grip on things until I went to community college.   There I met really true friends that have been with me till today.  I think the really hard part about this whole deal is finding out out how to love yourself.  Cross dressing brings about a beautiful inner self that we can love because of something we have created from within.  We cannot be ourselves until we learn to love who we are inside.  Then others can learn to love you as a friend.

I often struggle with this subject but I think it is working for me.

I started dressing in my mom's things when I was 10. Was really hooked after that. Quickly started trying on her dresses and it was great. Didn't know why I liked wanting to look like a girl, just knew I wanted to do it. My mom was a petite woman, so I quickly grew out of her things. By the time high school came around, nothing fit so I couldn't dress. It was terrible. I used to see the girls in high school not as potential dates, but was looking at what they were wearing and imagining how I would look in some of their outfits. And I couldn't tell a soul, especially in my conservative family.

It wasn't until college, when I started buying my own things and started hanging out in bars frequented by CDs, that my life turned around. I finally met other people like me. But what I did learn over the years was that I didn't want to be a full time woman and that I was, basically, content to inhabit both worlds. Is this a fetish and indulging in a sexual fantasy? Possibly, but all I know is I feel great when I'm Rita and I think exploring my feminine side has actually made me a better man, more compassionate, empathetic, patient, kinder and more polite towards people. In short, more ladylike. And if those are some of the benefits of being Rita, I'll take that any day.

Cathy,

I feel the exact same way! I like inhabiting both worlds, just wish I had more opportunities to dress and be Rita. I also have a very strong femme side and most of the things that gals like, especially shopping and chatting with girlfriends, but coexisting in both worlds at this stage in my life seems to working out best for me. It's sometimes hard making time for Rita, but I always enjoy it immensely when I do.

Definitely a mixture of all for me. I'm a CD as a whole, but there are different 'shades' or elements to it. I love each one of them <3

#2,I am femme love wearing women's clothes.It was me all these years

I guess I'm in the category of #1, I just like women's clothes. Of course if I'm wearing women's clothes and intend to go out of the house I need to really look the part. So that involves adding lots of other touches like hair, makeup, accessories.

I'm a mixture of 1 and 3.

1 I love women's clothes, esp skirts and dresses

2 I love sexy lingerie esp thigh high stockings and suspender belts they are so a sexual turn on for me. Fetish lol

i love women that wear these all things and unfortunately my wife is not one of the daily wearers in this world. She only wears stockings if I ask or nag, same with skirts and never dresses.
I have always been a secret wearer from a young age but part of my thing now is if she don't wear them then I will.  The other part of me loves wearing skirts and dresses and wearing lingerie makes me happy and feeds my fetish.

Emily x